The only thing rushing to get stars in this joint are the Luigi cookies.

LEGO Radio Free Nintendo the Video Game, coming 2019 to Switch.

We've finally seen the Nintendo Switch, so we finally get to Nintendo bitch. Strap yourself in...this is happening.

An alias is the most liberating thing. It frees you from your old sins, disassociates you from new ones, and lets you register for a Maestro card.

If RFN came in a box, this is the box quote we'll have earned.

All games should be pinball games.

Unlike alternate Zelda titles, please don't email us examples.

It's time to peel back the pseudonym and talk candidly with an essential leader of Planet GameCube.

The Four Horsemen themselves dissect the latest 3DS Nintendo Direct.

Why do we discount the value of puzzle games? That's a riddle, please answer it.

Let's just remove any artifice here; everyone gets a million stars and none of it matters.

While the cat's away, the doctor will…talk on a podcast, obviously.

I'm just a man, walking around, with a pipe but no rocks.

We have the foremost coverage of the biggest Nintendo news this week, Level-5 Vision.

Greg is not a man willing to negotiate on the purity of his Yoshi experience.

Is Pokémon Go causing Global Warming? Should you feel bad for enjoying the game narcoleptics can't? Will this headline get on the Google News front page? One can only hope.

Is that a Rayquaza in your bath or do I need to call my therapist?

As Season 5 approaches its first anniversary, we've redoubled our efforts to take the mantle of World's Most Important Nintendo Podcast seriously.

The E3 team pulls up to talk about Nintendo's games at E3. So by that, we mean Zelda, Nintendo's game at E3.

I thought Nintendo was above making licensed games.

We recorded our E3 reactions in front of a live studio audience. How did the Breath of the Wild move us?

With an event horizon at 20 centimeters, Kirby's mass would have to be many times that of the Earth. But gravitational distortions don't get to ride a mech.

Things get real on the latest interview in this special podcast mini-series.

I promise that this non-nonsensical title ties directly to Rondo of Blood.

This is not especially observant; it's always a word worth finding.

Funk Taxonomy is more than just my music crew.

Ten years on, Radio Free Nintendo has never answered our very first listener question.

It's a small wonder Great Fox doesn't transform into a robot, a tank, or some kind of robot-tank hybrid.

Nintendo's uninspiring financial briefing didn't deter half of team RFN from their responsibilities.

Despite showing up in this title, Falco Lombardi's child with Mata Hari is only recognized as side-canon.

We brought in an eShop developer to advise RFN as we launch our hot new banger.

Don't worry; my safe deposit box has climate control.

Jon has found his soulmate, an impersonal robotic voice that repeats his every thought.

Jonny is recording long-form interviews with staff members from the past 17 years of this website, and you can listen to them as a preview for his upcoming book. This one features N64 hot shot, website designer, and super-dad Justin Nation!

I just want to see his diary!

How do you judge the value of a man who lazily uses memes to make a joke about memes while they themselves are overusing a meme? Harshly.

I'll just say it: the "Bravely" series is weird.

Jonny is recording long-form interviews with staff members from the past 17 years of this website, and you can listen to them as a preview for his upcoming book. Check out the very first one, featuring super-veteran TYP!

The long awaited Xenoblade Chronicles X episode is finally here.

Nobody can wait for Pocket Card Jockey or Radio Free Nintendo.

Finally, we have found the true reason Nintendo's "voice chat system" is not workable.

More fun than a sack full of Soul Nuts.

My boy Hector once axed 40 guys in a single day; do you really think he's going to be shy about me touching his face?

Getting hit by a dragon's spear is always a bad time.

All inventory will be accompanied with a unique boutique price.

Nintendo of Europe wont even talk to you unless you're putting out a JRPG in February.

It does a good job of keeping the emotions bottled up; but that's really not healthy.

The end leads back to the beginning. Predictions become beloved games, or comedic failures.

Not everyone can be a winner; thankfully the host of the show gets to define all terms to his advantage

Philip K. Dick didn't live to see the Game Gear, but if he did this would be his most harrowing alternate history

Even the Lords of Thunder take off for the holidays.

This is a very serious conversation about "microtransactions."

I guess this makes Jon the show's Cloud Strife? I'm not comfortable with this analogy.

It turns out it's actually a butt; our mistake.

Who would have thought finding a guest would be as easy as throwing around a letter.

It's fine to be enthusiastic about your work, but stop shooting the walls.

There is a new king at Royal Tennis Academy. Long live the King!

Don't believe Nintendo, baboons are horrifying.

This isn't a rhetorical question; I need to know.

The Super Mario Maker circle is complete and we reveal the winner of our Mario Maker-inspired RetroActive poll.

I'm always looking to maximize the number of Yoshi kills my stages feature.

Disney may have Infinity, but Animal Crossing Happy Home Designer provides the truest look into the unlimited expanse of oblivion.

If Nintendo puts out some games we won't have to keep finding names for this.

Jon Lindemann's got to know we're going to get him out.

The Thunder Round has gained some new Lords.

Season 5's got a fresh new look, with the same great RFN taste.

The sun may set in the west, but the hover tank rises in the east.

Online games and news from Japan take the spotlight in this three-dude episode.

New Yoshi games don't always require his return, as far as he knows.

We can't talk about this subject anymore. *Similarities to other podcasts are purely "Coincidental"

An expert guest helps us preview some new games and revisit some old ones, mostly from Japan.

We're FINALLY back from E3 with fresh games and your Listener Mail (mostly about the show, of course).

James, J.P. and Donald knew with Smash Direct and the Nintendo World Championship there would be some pre-show news to talk about. Little did they know that the good ship E3 would spring so many leaks. We've got a quick catch-up for you.

I am become Hype.

It's the least predictable time of the year, so there's no better time for our annual E3 Predictions!

The live event is over, but the recording is now one of our biggest episodes ever!

Crouching Squid, Rolling Thunder

A first-time guest brings New (Leaf) Business, while we check out PuzzDra, HarmoKnight, Kerbals, and a lot of retro games. Plus: the debut of Silky MC, James's cure for your backlog, Gui's hope for Splatoon, and Kojima's future with Nintendo.

RFN gets really real on the decline of Konami, Goldeneye 007 on Wii, and Geometry Wars. Plus: return of the Thunder Round!

Curtis joins the ruckus to talk about all the hottest topics of 2015: Mario Kart, Donkey Kong, and Twilight Princess.

James is delighted by nearly everything on this episode, which features another infamous FPS and the return of the Listener Mail Lighting Round... or maybe it's better named the (Lords of) Thunder Round!

Gui plays a first-person shooter, on GameCube! Plus, your emails include the final Club Nintendo Elite rewards, Smash balloting, obscure rock band adventures, and Splatoon's voiceless online modes.

Ahh, there's too much to talk about! How did we cram it all in? With some help from Donald and our listeners' emails, as it turns out.

You are not prepared for the New Business about to go down. Plus: Elliot's Quest, Xeodrifter, NX launch games, living with a non-gamer, the mythical Nintendo phone, and haunting hanafuda music.

Nintendo is going third-party -- on smart phones and tablets. We might have something to say about that.

So many Nintendo games! So much quasi-Metroid! So great Listener Mail! Such grammar!

We have a weird set of games for New Business, and then it's time to sling cards in RetroActive!

The foursome is back together with loads of cool games and a sprawling edition of Listener Mail!

Our friend Josh Hillyer helps induct the New 3DS XL into the RFN tradition of Things-We-Really-Like-But-Still-Complain-About.

Our friend TYP drops in to helps us discuss lots of indie games, Pokemon, the D.I.C.E. awards, Virtual Handheld, and how to choose the right Smash Bros. character.

We're more than happy to recommend a few Club Nintendo rewards.

Get ready for RFN's first-ever live unboxing (of horror).

We catch up with a few games that didn't make our Top Five lists, and then a special guest lends a credibility boost to our stupid yearly predictions!

Even this extra-large episode can barely contain all the Nintendo Direct news and our Top Five Games of 2014!

We played games over the holiday break and would like to tell you about all of them!

Welcome the new year with a special episode that's all emails, all the time.

We finally get Bayonetta 2 and Captain Toad into New Business, just in time for the year's end. Plus: your Listener Mail!

We've got reactions to Zelda's huge world, a follow-up on Wii U's health, and lots of new games!

Back to our usual format, we blast through games and emails in this post-Thanksgiving episode.

The RFN guys play and discuss Smash Bros for Wii U in this unique episode, recorded during a four-way online match!