Author Topic: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!  (Read 21683 times)

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Offline Smoke39

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I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« on: September 29, 2006, 05:50:43 AM »
It's rather embarassing.  I cut myself today while shaving a certain part of my body that isn't my face.  Parallel blades for maximum damage!  I could have bled to death!  I'll sue!
GOREGASM!

Offline decoyman

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RE:I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #1 on: September 29, 2006, 06:47:53 AM »
Quote

Originally posted by: Smoke39
It's rather embarassing.


So, posting it on the Internet makes it better how... ?



(But seriously dude, be more careful next time, lol)
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Offline Smoke39

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RE:I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #2 on: September 29, 2006, 07:30:04 AM »
You're my friends!  I love you all!  I confide in my friends.

And I was careful!  I'm always careful when I shave that area!  It's a very important area to me.  My hand slipped!  And the razer--it's so diabolical in design--it cut me!  Cut me with parallel blades!
GOREGASM!

Offline ShyGuy

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #3 on: September 29, 2006, 08:43:22 AM »
Hush, you wanker.

Offline vudu

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #4 on: September 29, 2006, 08:58:07 AM »
Maybe you should just use a pair of electric clippers in the future.  
Why must all things be so bright? Why can things not appear only in hues of brown! I am so serious about this! Dull colors are the future! The next generation! I will never accept a world with such bright colors! It is far too childish! I will rage against your cheery palette with my last breath!

Offline Smoke39

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RE:I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #5 on: September 29, 2006, 09:40:34 AM »
Quote

Originally posted by: ShyGuy
Hush, you wanker.

Psh, you're just jealous of my virility, non-wanker.
GOREGASM!

Offline KDR_11k

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #6 on: September 29, 2006, 09:43:55 AM »
Razors cut you? Should have used gasoline and a match, no cuts that way.

Offline Smoke39

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #7 on: September 29, 2006, 09:48:10 AM »
Yeah, sure, how 'bout I set you on fire? D:<
GOREGASM!

Offline UltimatePartyBear

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #8 on: September 29, 2006, 10:03:05 AM »
Perhaps a nice acid bath to dissolve the hair would be less dangerous.

Offline Smoke39

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #9 on: September 29, 2006, 10:43:05 AM »
No.  I bathe in water.  NOT ACID.

Your ideas are dumb.  I will sue the manufacturer, and then buy razers that don't try to kill me with their parallel blades.
GOREGASM!

Offline ThePerm

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #10 on: September 29, 2006, 10:47:04 AM »
iv cut myself in that area, but not badly. Thats too bad.
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Offline Smoke39

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #11 on: September 29, 2006, 10:48:23 AM »
It wasn't a bad cut.  It was like a paper cut.  Two paper cuts.  From parallel blades.  I could have died.
GOREGASM!

Offline UltimatePartyBear

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #12 on: September 29, 2006, 10:48:40 AM »
Have you tried shaving with perpendicular blades instead?

Offline Smoke39

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #13 on: September 29, 2006, 10:49:47 AM »
No.  The cut resulted from perpendicular motion.  Perpendicular blades would be death.  Certain death.
GOREGASM!

Offline UltimatePartyBear

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #14 on: September 29, 2006, 11:01:05 AM »
Motion perpendicular to the blade is how shaving works.  You must have cut yourself because you were doing it wrong.  Maybe you just need shaving lessons.

Offline Smoke39

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RE:I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #15 on: September 29, 2006, 11:45:38 AM »
Motion orthogonal to the handle is what I was refering to.

visual aid!
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Offline UltimatePartyBear

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #16 on: September 29, 2006, 12:01:17 PM »
Given the subject matter, I trust you'll understand why I might be reluctant to follow a link to a picture from this thread.

Offline Smoke39

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #17 on: September 29, 2006, 12:03:17 PM »
Blood and gore!  It's like an action movie!  With a shower scene!  It's like that movie where that person gets stabbed in the shower!
GOREGASM!

Offline UltimatePartyBear

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #18 on: September 29, 2006, 12:38:57 PM »
Well, as long as there's plenty of action and none of that mushy stuff...

Brilliant.  You should get an award for this masterpiece of wit.

Offline Ceric

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #19 on: September 29, 2006, 12:39:19 PM »
...And thats how you lost you pony tail.

On a related note you should do like the rich child molester on Law and Order did.
Have laser treatment so you never have to worry about it again.
Or maybe Nair.  Though I don't know how well that works.
Genetic re-engineering may also take care of it.
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so, I don't have to edit as Much.

Offline Smoke39

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #20 on: September 29, 2006, 12:43:56 PM »
No.  I still have it.

I don't want laser treatment.  What if I later decide I want my hair back?  All I want is a razer that isn't designed for killing.
GOREGASM!

Offline Bill Aurion

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #21 on: September 29, 2006, 12:44:18 PM »
You didn't emphasize which part of the body you were shaving, could you enlighten us directly?
~Former Resident Zelda Aficionado and Nintendo Fan~

Offline Smoke39

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #22 on: September 29, 2006, 12:47:05 PM »
What's it t'you what part I shaved? <_<
GOREGASM!

Offline ShyGuy

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #23 on: September 29, 2006, 12:52:12 PM »
Ah, young love, sprung forth on PGC. Make sure I get an invite to you two's civil ceremony.

Offline Bill Aurion

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RE: I'll sue the razer manufacturer!
« Reply #24 on: September 29, 2006, 12:52:42 PM »
^_^
~Former Resident Zelda Aficionado and Nintendo Fan~