Author Topic: The Link Soap (Read 18833 times)

Marcus Arillius · « **Reply #50 on:** September 19, 2003, 04:10:00 AM »

Meanwhile back at zelda's castle...

Zelda: Everything is falling into place now... the spell I placed on Link is working perfectly... He's completely head over heals for Gannon.

Back at Gannon's

Gannon is looming over a magical crystal ball.... He's spying on Princess Zelda....

GANNON: Muah ha ha hah *hack.. cough* excuse me.... muah ha ha hah. The spell I placed on Zelda is working perfectly.... she did exactly what i wanted.... While i used my ability to manipulate her alliance between good evil... so she will be more devilish... (yeah.... its a gift) this in turn allowed me to manipulate her to use her ability to manipulate love.... this way she has made that insufferable Link to fall in love with me and track me down. Now that he's in my lair I can finally do away with him. Muah ha ha ha. Muah ha ah.

What will become of Link? Will he break free of Zelda's love spell? Will Zelda break free of Gannon's evil spell? Will Gannon break free of Louie teh cat's spell? Find out on the next exciting episode of the Link Soap.

PiGPEN · « **Reply #51 on:** September 20, 2003, 09:35:17 PM »

oh yeah make it all Potions...sheesh ...and Ganon wasnt in his lair last he was with link in the pipe to the mushroom kingdom....and im tellin ya Ganon is spelled with 1 N not 2

but 2 can play at that...

Ganon: with the use of my magic ive taken over Zelda so she could take over Link so i could kill him
Link: whats that pudding pop?
Ingo: Alright that explains that but then why am i pregnant?
Kirby: yes and to add more confusion ive taken control of Ganon
Ingo: SH!T! stop popping up like that
Link: so what do we do about all these mind controlling potions?
Kirby: uh i'll have to read the label
Ganon: the potions are undoable
Kirby: quiet im reading....hmmm seems these potions are undoable
Link: UNDOABLE!
Ganon: UNDOABLE! ...no wait i knew that
Ingo: No! if we find the key maker he'll take us to Mt. Doom where we can...
Kirby: what the heck are you talking about?
Ingo: i dont get enough lines
Ganon: well i guess things will just have to keep going the way theyre going
Kirby: nuts to that im outta here
Link: hey! we're through the pipe...we're in the Mushroom Kingdom!

...to be continued...

Link: HEY WAIT! Ganon never got a chance to respond to my gesture of love!

Klutzy Girl · « **Reply #52 on:** September 21, 2003, 08:37:08 AM »

Wait now I'm confused...how come marcus is adding onto the story? And I don't get what's going on it's like I missed a part of it or something...

PiGPEN · « **Reply #53 on:** September 26, 2003, 09:45:18 PM »

i said when i started this that anyone could add to it if they wanted...its just that nobody wanted to. oh and i find it very offensive the way marcus tried to totally turnaround the story just to make it politically correct...luckily an explaination is only as great as its inventors imagination...

..........

Ganon's Army marches steadily to the Princess' Castle...
Link: uh Ganon i, i love you
Ganon: you hardly know me you ponce!
Link: just tell me i have a chance
Ganon: you're-
PigMinion: HYLIAN TROOPS AHEAD!
Ganon: they're surrounding Toadstool's castle!
Ingo: we have to hurry and save her!
Link: im what?!? im sexy? im interesting? im the love of your life? YOU'RE- WHAT!?!

The first platoon of Hylian troops storm the castle...
Inside Princess Toadstool hangs in a cage over a pool of lava...
HTLeader: freeze Princess we have you surrounded!
Toadstool: Put your guns down or i jump
HTLeader: alright im putting the gun down just come up off that ledge
(another troop whispers to the Leader)
HTLeader: hold on! we were sent here to kill you! FIRE!!!

Under the barrage of gun fire the chain holding the cage snaps and the
Princess plummets into the lava and dissapeers in the toxic steam of metal.

Outside the Castle the Pig Minions and Hylian Troops battle for their Lords...
As Ganon, Link and Ingo force their way into the castle...
Within the castle our heroes find Hylian Troops rejoice drinking the
Mushroom Kingdoms royal ale and digging through the Princess' laundry...
Ganon: whats going on here?
DrunkHT: well first we killed Princess Toadstool and we're having a PAAAARTYYY
(Drunk Hylian Troop pats Ganon on the stomach)
(Ganon takes out his club and smashes the Drunk's head in)
Link: wow youre so forceful Ganon

As Link and Ganon conduct their vengance by killing each and
every Hylian Troop Ingo wanders off through the castle...
Ingo: man its not fair...i dont get a weapon or lines
Ingo: Link doesnt even talk to me anymore...its all Ganon this Ganon that
Ingo: what do i get!? i get pregnant!
As Ingo walks on through the castle all the walls are now mirrors...
Ingo: heh this must be Peach's er i mean Toadstool's makeup room
*PiGPEN*: see this is why you dont get lines i told you not to call her Peach!
(Ingo looks at himself in the mirror)
(Then Ingo starts moving and the mirror image has stopped in place)
Ingo: hey what the-?
(Ingo pokes at the mirror)
Luigi: ow! stop that or i'll whup yo ass!

...to be continued...

PIAC · « **Reply #54 on:** October 03, 2003, 01:38:28 AM »

this is still around? O_o

PiGPEN · « **Reply #55 on:** October 03, 2003, 09:07:50 PM »

alright i can take anger and outrage and pity and all other types of bad stuff torward my work but not it being 'boring' or 'whatever' or in this case 'this still around?' so if you're not gonna either love me or hate me I QUIT! no more thats the end SCREW YOU GUYS IM GOING HOME!

If you had a choice between going to hell or nothing which would you choose?

PIAC · « **Reply #56 on:** October 03, 2003, 09:28:25 PM »

nothing! aslong as i can take my gameboy

nitsu niflheim · « **Reply #57 on:** October 14, 2003, 10:18:25 AM »

Quote
If you had a choice between going to hell or nothing which would you choose?

Ohh, you give me a choice. When then I choose to... go to Hell. Yep, gonna go to Hell, gonna go to Hell. *sing-songs as I get my handbasket all ready for Hell*

KnowsNothing · « **Reply #58 on:** October 14, 2003, 10:57:48 AM »

"alright i can take anger and outrage and pity and all other types of bad stuff torward my work but not it being 'boring' or 'whatever' or in this case 'this still around?' so if you're not gonna either love me or hate me I QUIT! no more thats the end SCREW YOU GUYS IM GOING HOME!"

Isn't that what we've all wanted?

PiGPEN · « **Reply #59 on:** October 16, 2003, 09:31:39 PM »

yeah sure but you werent bored before...anyway i dont quite understand why people were offended sure it was a bit of Nintendo sacrelige but thats what humor is...evil

plus another reason i dont know why people were offended was that we're mostly Aussie and Canucks round here right? And ive never known an Aussie or Canuck to ever take anything seriously (well except channel TEN....inside joke)

oh and Link's gaay. DK's gaay. McCloud is gaay. And Mario is open-minded.

nitsu niflheim · « **Reply #60 on:** October 17, 2003, 04:05:48 PM »

I'm offended because it doesn't make any sense. You just seemed to jump from one idea to the other without giving anything any real thought.

And I'm American.

thepoga · « **Reply #61 on:** October 20, 2003, 06:36:56 PM »

nitsujdark ur an idiot.
this is the funniest and best link thing ever!!!!!
I mean, its a stroke of genius. ok, now before you all start bashing me, and before pigpen gets too happy i have something to confess...

This is the most idiotic thing i have ever read. I made jokes like these in like 3rd grade. its not funny anymore! nitsujdark, i agree with you that this doesn't make any sense. BUT you forgot to mention that this is stupid. id like to prove this mathematically. take the amount of posts pigpen makes. then subtract that by how many dumb posts pigpen makes. then multiply that by 50. this should all come out to be zero. thats how funny this is!

KnowsNothing · « **Reply #62 on:** October 21, 2003, 04:50:19 PM »

/\/\47H 15 Gr347!

PiGPEN · « **Reply #63 on:** October 26, 2003, 09:15:52 PM »

zuh?

Ms.Pikmin · « **Reply #64 on:** October 27, 2003, 05:09:47 AM »

I think he said math is great. Is that right? I am still learning this heinous language.

KnowsNothing · « **Reply #65 on:** October 27, 2003, 08:37:07 AM »

Good job Ms. Pikmin! U R @\/\/3$0M3!

PiGPEN · « **Reply #66 on:** October 31, 2003, 05:55:01 PM »

NOW WHOS SPEWING INANE DRIBBLE!?!

KnowsNothing · « **Reply #67 on:** October 31, 2003, 05:58:23 PM »

Hostile Creation · « **Reply #68 on:** November 01, 2003, 11:48:48 AM »

@/\/D /\/\3!1!!1!!!11! $\/\/337!

thepoga · « **Reply #69 on:** November 03, 2003, 01:59:41 PM »

hey pig pen, why dont u make ur "own" website so u dont have to put ur crap on this one. use geocities.com. u can even post stuff on this website and have ur URL in ur signature. of course only pedophiles and necrophiliacs will click but all the same.

KnowsNothing · « **Reply #70 on:** November 05, 2003, 09:47:32 AM »

PIGPEN isn't posting here anymore. no need to bring it up.

Hostile Creation · « **Reply #71 on:** November 05, 2003, 10:40:29 AM »

Alas. I miss him already.

PiGPEN · « **Reply #72 on:** November 09, 2003, 04:40:35 PM »

Quote
Originally posted by: thepoga
hey pig pen, why dont u make ur "own" website so u dont have to put ur crap on this one. use geocities.com. u can even post stuff on this website and have ur URL in ur signature. of course only pedophiles and necrophiliacs will click but all the same.

websites suck...i would not waste my precious time to make a tiny little webbysite in the ocean that is the internet. why pedophiles and necrophiliacs? there is no dead sex or child sex in this story...or sex at all for that matter...just sexual themes.

oh and theres no gap in my name. get it right arsehole!

Bloodworth · « **Reply #73 on:** November 09, 2003, 07:32:01 PM »

Not sure why this wasn't reported much earlier. Anyways, that last comment was enough to get him banned on its own.

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Author Topic: The Link Soap (Read 18833 times)