Author Topic: Random LOL of the day thread  (Read 233617 times)

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Offline BlackNMild2k1

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #400 on: March 09, 2010, 10:00:03 PM »
i didn't scroll that far...

Quote
Types of Bitches: A list compiled by inner-city 3rd graders

1) Dirty dumb ass bitches
2) Aint got no ass bitches
3) Dusty trick bitches
4) ...............

Offline Stogi

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #401 on: March 09, 2010, 10:27:51 PM »
That takes the LOL factor to new heights!
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Offline ThePerm

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #402 on: March 10, 2010, 08:33:31 PM »
The Dish came on tv and i realized Danielle Fishel is a #37

other #37s

Marge Simpson
Lisa Simpson
Betty Rubble
Wilma Flintstone
Meg Griffin
Lois Griffin
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Offline BlackNMild2k1

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #403 on: April 02, 2010, 04:53:17 PM »
Look up in the sky !!!
It's a bird... it's a plane...!!

Offline ThePerm

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #404 on: April 02, 2010, 10:43:29 PM »
lol i see two things that are supeman like
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Offline ThePerm

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« Last Edit: April 02, 2010, 10:47:17 PM by ThePerm »
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Offline Stratos

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #406 on: April 03, 2010, 03:14:02 AM »
LOL, what? How did that happen?
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Offline ThePerm

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Offline UltimatePartyBear

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #409 on: April 16, 2010, 10:11:57 AM »
I guess this is the best place to post this.

This is an actual IM conversation I had with a coworker today.  The office was ordering us lunch, and one of us would have to sign the boss's name, which starts with a G.

him: you should sign for the pizza
me: But I can't remember how to write a capital G in cursive.
[long pause]
him: um
[at this point he's realized he can't remember, either]
him: sign in non cursive :)
me: That's not signing.
me: That's printing.
him: some people sign their name in print
him: you don't HAVE to use cursive
me: Maybe I could just put an X.

He ended up having to google it.  The good news is someone else is going to sign for it.  The bad news is the pizza still isn't here yet. :(

Offline vudu

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #410 on: April 16, 2010, 11:40:39 AM »
me: But I can't remember how to write a capital G in cursive.

It sorta looks like a 2, right?

No wait, on second thought I'm pretty sure it's the capital Q that resembles a 2.
« Last Edit: April 16, 2010, 11:44:44 AM by vudu »
Why must all things be so bright? Why can things not appear only in hues of brown! I am so serious about this! Dull colors are the future! The next generation! I will never accept a world with such bright colors! It is far too childish! I will rage against your cheery palette with my last breath!

Offline ThePerm

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #411 on: April 16, 2010, 06:13:44 PM »
that didnt make me lol, that made me say wow

what is in the water


hehe, funny my cursive G doesn't have that loop, and thats why people shouldn't write in cursive, because everyone writes their letter differently. I've had a tough enough time trying to read my Grandma's Birthday letters.
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Offline Halbred

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #412 on: April 16, 2010, 06:18:14 PM »
Why are push-pins so expensive?

There's a thumb tax!!!
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Offline ThePerm

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #413 on: April 16, 2010, 07:00:52 PM »
damnit, You already did that one on facebook

did you hear about the accountants dog? his name is tax. he opened the door and in come tax :).
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Offline Halbred

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #414 on: April 16, 2010, 09:11:09 PM »
I did, didn't I?

And that joke is horrible. In a good way.
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Offline TheBlackCat

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #415 on: April 16, 2010, 11:20:06 PM »
I was walking to my apartment one day and I saw a google maps...tricycle.  It was like one of those oversized tricycles that tourists hire to show them around, except instead of seats in the back it had a big box with a pole sticking out of it topped with a ring of cameras.  I assume they were using it to do street view of alleys.


On a funnier note, my favorite joke:

Three men were fishing the Gulf of Mexico when one of them pulled in a huge fish.

But as soon as it was in the boat the fish shook the hook out of its mouth and transformed into an angry bearded many wearing a crown and brandishing a three-pronged spear.

"Who are you, sir?" quavered one of the fishermen.

"I am Neptune, god of the sea, and I am going to put a curse on your!  Before you get home, your boat will spring a dozen leaks--nay, make that a dozen and a half for good measure!"

With a nasty laugh Neptune dived over the side and disappeared.  The fishermen's boat got so many holes in it that they had to swim ashore, and from that day to this they have never forgetten Neptune's eighteen-hole Gulf curse.


Another good one:

Did I ever tell you I write headlines for a newspaper run by trained animals?  The gnus are in charge of the headline department, and they pay very well.  You'd be suprised how much the newspaper headline gnus pay per headline.

(if you don't get it try reading it aloud)
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Offline EasyCure

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #416 on: April 17, 2010, 10:44:57 AM »
i read this in the comment section on one of the many websites that posted the story about that women becoming a sex addict after a wiifit accident:

A man is sitting next to an attractive woman on a plane. He notices she's sneezing quiet a bit, but finds it strange that when she does she takes her tissue and dabs it between her thighs. He tries hard, but eventually has to make a comment:

"Bless you.. " he starts timidly

"Thank you" she replies

"Ma'am, I'm sorry but i must ask.. I noticed when you sneeze you.."

"Yes," she interrupts, "I have this rare condition; when I sneeze i have a tremendous orgasm..."

"oh" he says shocked, "are you taking anything for it?"

"yes, pepper"

February 07, 2003, 02:35:52 PM
EASYCURE: I remember thinking(don't ask me why) this was a blond haired, blue eyed, chiseled athlete. Like he looked like Seigfried before he became Nightmare.

Offline nickmitch

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #417 on: April 17, 2010, 10:53:07 AM »
This happened on campus recently.
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Offline TheBlackCat

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #418 on: April 17, 2010, 09:36:33 PM »
...
"yes, pepper"

That actually reminds me of a true story one of my professors told in one of my undergrad classes.  A woman had an electrical implant in her spinal cord.  It released occasional weak electrical pulses to control the condition.  Since it was an early experimental unit they let her tweak the electrical pulses, and she found quite by accident that a certain combination of parameters allowed her to trigger an orgasm just with a push of a button.  As my professor said, "she was having a grand old time".  Unfortunately the scientists were not able to reproduce the effect on subsequent patients.
Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
-Jeff Raskin

Offline Halbred

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #419 on: April 18, 2010, 06:39:06 PM »
Why do people bring an extra pair of socks to the golf course?

Just in case they get a hole in one.
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Offline EasyCure

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #420 on: April 19, 2010, 02:50:30 PM »
Vajazzle

giving "pearl necklaces" a whole new meaning?
February 07, 2003, 02:35:52 PM
EASYCURE: I remember thinking(don't ask me why) this was a blond haired, blue eyed, chiseled athlete. Like he looked like Seigfried before he became Nightmare.

Offline BlackNMild2k1

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #421 on: April 19, 2010, 02:59:10 PM »
Vajazzle

giving "pearl necklaces" a whole new meaning?

I remember when J. Love was on Lopez Tonite talking about her bedazzled Vajayjay.
I was really hoping she would show it off.

giving "diving for treasure" a whole new meaning ;)

Offline EasyCure

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #422 on: April 19, 2010, 03:05:21 PM »
dammit i knew there was a better phrase i could go with!

at least i didn't go with my original thought something along the lines of "i'd love to jizzle a vajazzled vajayjay"
February 07, 2003, 02:35:52 PM
EASYCURE: I remember thinking(don't ask me why) this was a blond haired, blue eyed, chiseled athlete. Like he looked like Seigfried before he became Nightmare.

Offline Shorty McNostril

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #423 on: April 27, 2010, 05:58:55 AM »
I found a nifty little tool to help you with PC monitor maintenance.  It will also work with your TV.

http://www.raincitystory.com/flash/screenclean.swf

Offline Stogi

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Re: Random LOL of the day thread
« Reply #424 on: April 27, 2010, 04:56:41 PM »
Vajazzle

giving "pearl necklaces" a whole new meaning?

L O fucking L

I found a nifty little tool to help you with PC monitor maintenance.  It will also work with your TV.

http://www.raincitystory.com/flash/screenclean.swf

Hahahaha

this is definitely being forwarded!
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