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I'll absolutely agree Microsoft has a great thing going with XBL but is it necessarily relevant to Nintendo's customers?
Yes, or else Nintendo's customers wouldn't be in such a funk about it.
Again, asking Nintendo to do away with friend codes isn't asking them to change over and go for Wii Live. Nintendo is more than capable of finding some sort of middle ground without ripping off Xbox Live but providing more functionality than they are currently able to with friend codes. I mean, heck, Sony did it.
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Nintendo can choose to be socially responsible if they want?
But see, this implies that friend codes are they only way for Nintendo to be socially responsible, and that others who don't employ this system aren't being socially responsible.
See, I've always looked at Nintendo's friend codes as the gamingsphere equivalent of those hard right-wing movements to keep condoms and birth control away from the youth, thinking that by providing them with methods of contraception they're encouraging promiscuity on a dangerous level. Sure, by taking away methods of contraception/STD prevention a few aware young people might stay away from sex, but it's not illogical to believe that the majority wouldn't, and without condoms and birth control they'd be exposing themselves to a much greater risk of pregnancy or STDs. So, in effect, it's a movement that does more harm than good.
Nintendo, instead of providing more safety options/tools to keep the service relatively safe AND equally open to the world, is hoping that friend codes keep people "safe" from online predators by confining most of the online functionality between only people they know and who have Wiis. Even at the cost of stifling the mature, responsible gamer. And sure, there are going to be people who don't care enough and will only play Wii games online with people they know, but for a lot of people it won't be enough. A lot of people are going to want the full experience of playing with people all over the world which is really want online play is all about (with more functionality than just random matches), and to make up for lost functionality are going to go online and give their friend codes away to strangers on message boards. This behavior renders friend codes pointless because it's just as dangerous, if not more so because it establishes several points of contact between a predator and possible prey.
There are plenty of options for making online a safe place for all people to game while not taking away from the functionality and what makes online gaming popular, and these methods have been employed by other companies to various degrees. I just think the method Nintendo is using with friend codes is a little drastic and counter-productive.