Author Topic: Transformers: Dark of the Moon Stealth Force Edition Review  (Read 1847 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Halbred

  • Staff Paleontologist, Ruiner of Worlds
  • NWR Staff
  • Score: 17
    • View Profile
    • When Pigs Fly Returns
Transformers: Dark of the Moon Stealth Force Edition Review
« on: January 01, 2012, 06:43:15 PM »

"And they said it couldn't be done!"

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/review/28840

All the Transformers games have had Wii versions, and none of them have been very good. War for Cybertron famously took the “light gun shooter” route. Game reviewers have been joking for years that someday they’d make a Wii Transformers game that took out the transforming. Ladies and gentlemen, that day has come.* The title refers to the cars transforming (stealthily?) into cars with guns. The whole concept comes from a minor sequence in the awful, awful film, in which Bumblebee decides to give those Decepticons what for in the same way. Let’s take that thirty-second action sequence and stretch it into an entire game concept. This game was built on a rock-solid conceptual foundation.

Stealth Force doesn’t feature any in-game transformations. Robots transform in cutscenes, but the cut-scenes themselves are little more than Flash animations with Peter Cullen phoning in the narration. During actual gameplay, you drive around in vehicle form and transform (slightly) into a car that has guns popping out of it and controls differently. In “stealth force” mode, you can strafe. The control scheme is actually pretty abysmal: you drive around with the control stick in vehicle mode, but switch awkwardly to the D-pad in “stealth force” mode. You’ll switch between Autobots, as they try to stop the Decepticons from awakening Shockwave (if you’ve seen the movie, you know how that turns out), and Decepticons, as they try to hold back the Autobots. The problem (the problem?) is that every mission feels like a badly put together deathmatch from Twisted Metal. You drive around shooting other cars until you run out of missiles, at which point you retreat, find more missile pickups, and go back to business. Health and special defensive items are scattered around each map, and each Autobot has a chain gun with unlimited ammo should the need arise. But it seriously took me 20 minutes to shoot down a door because Optimus had to keep going back to replenish his missiles and, en route, take on all the respawning Decepticons in his way.

Every. Freaking. Time.

At least the graphics are—wait, what am I saying? The graphics are terrible. Bare-bones car models that would look out of place on PS2 games drive around boring environments with flat textures that all look like re-skinned versions of each other, though a few do have buildings. You will hear the same voice samples and sound effects endlessly until your brain explodes. Sometimes there’s no music…at all. The cutscenes feature horrible writing and animations that make Super Meat Boy’s cutscenes look like Avatar. This is not a good game by any stretch, and I should probably mention again that it’s a Transformers game that has undercut the core mechanic of the entire franchise: transforming. And isn’t that all you need to know? The game does feature six co-op missions for split-screen local play, but why would you put someone you love through this torture?

*That day actually came around the time Transformers 3 hit theaters. I received this review copy at about the same time my Wii decided to stop working, so it’s been sitting on my shelf ever since, collecting dust.

This would be my PSN Trophy Card, but I guess I can't post HTML in my Signature. I'm the pixel spaceship, and I have nine Gold trophies.

Offline oohhboy

  • should smile more
  • Score: 39
    • View Profile
Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon Stealth Force Edition Review
« Reply #1 on: January 01, 2012, 08:20:41 PM »
A 4 is overrating it eh?
I'm Lacus. I'm fine as Lacus!
Pffh. Toilet paper? What do you think cats are for?

Offline Flames_of_chaos

  • Dancing News Panda
  • Score: -1
    • View Profile
Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon Stealth Force Edition Review
« Reply #2 on: January 02, 2012, 09:12:28 AM »
What's the purpose of a Transformer if it can't Transform.
PM me for DS and Wii game friend codes
Wii: 6564 0802 7064 2744
3DS: 4124-5011-7289
PSN: Flames_of_chaos XBL tag: Evulcorpse
http://twitter.com/flames_of_chaos/

Former NWR and PixlBit staff member.

Offline KDR_11k

  • boring person
  • Score: 28
    • View Profile
Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon Stealth Force Edition Review
« Reply #3 on: January 02, 2012, 10:21:36 AM »
to err?

Offline TrueNerd

  • Score: 6
    • View Profile
Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon Stealth Force Edition Review
« Reply #4 on: January 02, 2012, 03:23:50 PM »
Is it adversely affected at all by the fact that the movie it's based on is dog ****?

Offline Halbred

  • Staff Paleontologist, Ruiner of Worlds
  • NWR Staff
  • Score: 17
    • View Profile
    • When Pigs Fly Returns
Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon Stealth Force Edition Review
« Reply #5 on: January 02, 2012, 04:01:06 PM »
Probably.
This would be my PSN Trophy Card, but I guess I can't post HTML in my Signature. I'm the pixel spaceship, and I have nine Gold trophies.

Offline TJ Spyke

  • Ass
  • Score: -1350
    • View Profile
    • Spyke Shop
Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon Stealth Force Edition Review
« Reply #6 on: January 02, 2012, 05:05:49 PM »
The movie is really good, one of the best action movies of the year.
Help out a poor college student, buy video games and Blu-ray Discs at: http://astore.amazon.com/spyke-20

Offline KITT 10K

  • Score: 0
    • View Profile
Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon Stealth Force Edition Review
« Reply #7 on: January 03, 2012, 02:12:15 PM »
The movie was great, (I only wish the did a decent job for the games). With no  robot into vehicle transformation, (other than a stupid cut seen), means it is NOT a Transformers game! It's just a "cheep knock off wanna be" with Peter Cullen doing Optimus Prime's voice.  To say it rates a "1" would STILL be ab over statement.