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Author Topic: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck  (Read 4920 times)

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Offline GoldenPhoenix

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Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« on: August 24, 2007, 02:48:49 PM »
According to Matt on the latest Wiik in review he believes IGN's competitors will rank Metroid Prime 3 in the 8-8.5 range. So prepare for the suckage before it is too late!
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Offline UERD

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #1 on: August 24, 2007, 02:52:40 PM »
If I immerse it in water, will it become playable?
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Offline GoldenPhoenix

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RE:Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #2 on: August 24, 2007, 02:56:07 PM »
It may, though you'd have a better chance of enjoying Cruisn for Wii then you would have enjoying Metroid Prime 3. Nintendo is doomed, they have put no effort in Metroid Prime 3 and pure suckage developed. Looks like the phazon corrupted Metroid Prime 3's gameplay and now it may get 8s!
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Offline Mario

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #3 on: August 24, 2007, 03:42:04 PM »
I have already rated it a 0. Guess nobody will be able to play it now.
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Offline KDR_11k

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #4 on: August 24, 2007, 09:46:08 PM »
No blood. 7.9
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Offline Caliban

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RE:Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #5 on: August 25, 2007, 02:58:54 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by: GoldenPhoenix
...IGN's competitors will rank Metroid Prime 3 in the 8-8.5 range...


1UP for the rescue.
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Offline Mashiro

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #6 on: August 25, 2007, 05:04:55 AM »
Anyone who honestly thought MP3 would be any good is stupid.

Only fanboys like Metroid and Wii for that matter. It's just a stupid fad.

Excuse me I'm going to go play . . . hot shots golf on my PS3 lozers! LAWL!
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Offline Caliban

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #7 on: August 25, 2007, 07:37:37 AM »
Make sure you get some hot shots upskirts photos for us.
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Offline Mashiro

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RE:Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #8 on: August 25, 2007, 08:02:39 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by: Caliban
Make sure you get some hot shots upskirts photos for us.


Of course man . . .

they're all in the slideshow . . .

(+100 cool points for anyone who gets that reference).
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Offline Kairon

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #9 on: August 25, 2007, 09:16:20 AM »
Gamespot, STRIKE!
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A glooming peace this morning with it brings;
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Offline KDR_11k

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RE:Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #10 on: August 25, 2007, 09:46:10 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by: Caliban
Make sure you get some hot shots upskirts photos for us.


Would be better if he was playing Pangya.
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Offline Caliban

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #11 on: August 26, 2007, 03:25:43 AM »
But then we wouldn't be able to get any detail from a Standard Definition game, HD all the way baby.
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Offline Crimm

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RE:Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #12 on: August 27, 2007, 09:47:17 AM »
8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0 8.0

MP3 = teh failz
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Offline GoldenPhoenix

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RE:Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #13 on: August 28, 2007, 12:41:28 PM »
Variety CONFIRMS Metroid Prime 3 sucks. Here it is.

Quote
In addition to being borderline nonsensical, "Metroid Prime 3" is also difficult. It has the audacity to say, "Welcome to this strange place. Now go figure it out." Much of the game consists of groping around strange places, puzzling out devices, and traveling back and forth to find new powers, which serve also as "keys" to get to previously unreachable areas.


Quote
Too much of the time, though, "Metroid Prime 3" is more tedious than epic. This is particularly true of the boss battles, which are exhaustive affairs requiring dedication, patience, and most importantly, a familiarity with the vocabulary of videogames: double jumping, circle strafing, shooting weak points for massive damage, etc. Those who previously used the Wii only for party games will need a 13 year-old boy to explain it all.
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Offline UERD

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #14 on: August 28, 2007, 12:52:32 PM »
Wait, Halo was well-paced, thrilling, and had a great narrative? What?
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Offline Bill Aurion

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #15 on: August 28, 2007, 01:01:37 PM »
"It has the audacity to say, "Welcome to this strange place. Now go figure it out.""

Ahahaha, GOD FORBID a Metroid game make you figure things out on your own!

"This is particularly true of the boss battles, which are exhaustive affairs requiring dedication, patience, and most importantly, a familiarity with the vocabulary of videogames: double jumping, circle strafing, shooting weak points for massive damage, etc."

What?  WHAT!?  Wrong, wrong, wrong, WRONG...Exhaustive more like awesome of epic proportions...
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Offline GoldenPhoenix

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RE:Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #16 on: August 28, 2007, 01:04:51 PM »
Double jump always confuse people, what a vague gaming term!
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Offline ShyGuy

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #17 on: August 28, 2007, 01:19:14 PM »
Holy crap! Who reviewed this? my grandma?
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Offline Mashiro

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #18 on: August 28, 2007, 01:20:36 PM »
So . . . Metroid fails because it is NOT party game with one control function?

Variety fails at everything and should go out of business.  
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Offline ShyGuy

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RE: Confirmed: Metroid Prime 3 will suck
« Reply #19 on: August 28, 2007, 01:37:52 PM »
What's sad is this was written by Tom Chick, who writes for Games For Windows magazine, among other. This guy is a gamer, so I have to think this is a satire piece or he got some editorial directive to "write it for a Wii Grandma"
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