Wheresville, Transylvania wasn’t a very pleasant place to live, thought Mayor Bloomershelaiplarestian as he walked the cobbled streets. It was a cluster of homes and shops on a hill surrounded by woods... filled with heavy winds, dark alleyways, centuries old buildings in horrific disrepair, and the metric system. And now with these mysterious disappearances, there was a very real chance the town would be named as one of Time magazine’s ‘50 worst places to live’ for the second year in a row. And that couldn’t be allowed to happen.
The mayor knew the PIEtriot Act had to be passed. But, in order for that to happen, there needed to be proof that the disappearances were actually caused by vampires and werewolves, and not just people running away to Norway. There was only one thing that made sense: the mayor had to kill the next person to walk by, stab his neck with fake teeth marks, rip open his stomach, and eat his innards.
...The next person to walk by was Kirby.
Which would’ve been fine, except, as the mayor raised his blood soaked face, he saw Bill Aurion had witnessed the entire event...and the mayor was forced to strangle him with Kirby’s intestine. By the time Breakyboy and Degeullo were sliced open with Bill’s teeth, the mayor was starting to see the folly of killing Kirby on a well-trafficked street. Fortunately, breaky-boy carried a pistol, and the dispatching of PIAC, SS4, Bloodworth and Infernal Monkey was fairly quick.
The PIEtriot act passed with flying colors. Mayor Bloomershelaiplarestian was named official judge, jury, and executioner for the Town of Wheresville.
“Ladies and gentlemen,” the mayor shouted, the pink light of early sun illuminating the cobblestones where seven bloody bodies once laid. “Though the PIEtriot act dictates I can kill whomever I please, this isn’t the middle ages. I would never kill a Wheresville citizen without due process.”
“Then why do you need the powers the PIEtriot acts provides?” asked KnowsNothing.
The mayor shot him. “UNLESS, they unpietriotically question the law, me, or my motives.” He grinned. “The vampires and werewolves will be eliminated. Every day, you will vote for who you suspect. And every night, the loser of the vote will be declared guilty, killed, and then hanged in the public square as an example. Voting begins now.”
Topic: Mafia IV: Day One (Read 9718 times)
