"Ah, the heat. It is... invigorating, no?"
Deguello stood on the balcony of his hotel. Rio de Setembro allows such luxuries to those of moderate means.
"It truly is great to be in this hot, sweaty, passionate place, no?"
"O senhor, seu papel está aqui," sounded from outside the room.
"Ay, I have a visitor. Come in, please."
A small boy of 10 or so years entered with a newspaper in tow. He had separated it from the others in a tiny wagon.
"O senhor, seu jornal está aqui. Elogios do Toalete Impetuoso."
"Menino, we have other eyes watching and other ears hearing. It would be quite rude for them to have to read a dictionary, and Babelfish is too many clicks away. For the sake of our glorious conversation, be a good menino and switch to the other channel of your simulcast."
"Mas senhor, eu sei somente o portuguĂŞs. Eu nĂŁo falo o inglĂŞs."
Deguello exasperatedly sighed and had to accept that, despite being a minor character himself, not everybody is able to communicate with the readers. Even if he himself became the target of the vicious ninjas, the filthy pirates, or the kneejerk reactions of the easily led townsfolk, the fact that he speaks modern English makes him important in the big picture. Suddenly, inspiration knocked on the door to Deguello's mind. He knows how he can be more important.
"I have it. I must outlast to others. My character will become more important once the others are knocked out. As the number of people go down, my importance and influence goes up!" Deguello cackled.
"Por favor, senhor. Faça exame do papel e pare-o de molestar a galinha."
Deguello complied and put it down, free to roam the streets. The paper was the Livro-razĂŁo De Setembro, much to Deguello's dismay, as he was expecting The New York Times.
"This paper is terrible. It smells of fish. Ay, what is this story?"
Deguello eyed the Headline. "Poderia vocĂŞ ser um ninja ou um pirata?"
Deguello thought to himself, "I could! You never know if you truly are a member of their secret organizations. The Ninja are so secretive, and the Pirates so disorganized, that ANYONE could be a member. It could be possible."
"É você importante, senhor?"
"I can't answer that, menino. There will come a day when the answers will come, my importance will be found."
"Eu penso que o matarĂŁo porque vocĂŞ datilografa demasiado." The boy left.
Deguello didn't hear, because he was enthralled in the funny pages of the Times.
"Ahahaha, this Family Circus never gets old. How can he come up with so many funny ideas after 46 years? He even sources Peanuts as his inspiration! I can like both! Some of Keane's ideas are BETTER than Schulz's!"
Unfortunately, he said those words too loud on the balcony. Some streetwalkers heard him and began to charge the front door. He had only been in the room for 30 minutes, but already he was on the run for his life.
"That's okay. Once I get more important... nobody can stop me."