Topic: The 2018 Evan_B Game Awards - a message from the future

[Order.RSS]

It's ya boi, dat trusted ol' pal Evan_B coming atcha live from the future!!

So I'm out on the town for a millenial festival right (ugh those millenials so entitled know i'm sayin') and lo' and behold my friend's clumsy dad accidentally zorped us all into a time portal! I'll spare y'all the gory details so as not to Trigger anyone, but after some roundabout swervings I finally ended up at that most enviable of places: The 2018 Game Awards (sponsored by Beybladez)!!!

To give y'all plebians of the past a sneak peek I figured I'd share the winners with you, so you 2017ers can place bets on these and look super clairvoyant a year from now. Note to self: buy lottery ticket #52989258 in March!

Now I, Evan_B, don't know too much about RPGs of course, but the best RPG turned out to be Lost Reavers! Following the announcement I downloaded it (for free even!) right away of course and it is now my favourite game of all time. An engrossing story of four misfits who must unite pieces of a crystal to save the world, online too! Some phantasy these designers display. Y'all ain't ready for these 2018 graphics, hold on to your hats:

I play in Japanese like real otakus

Following my newly-found love of RPGs I was pleased to see I had returned to the 2018 Beybladez Game Awards (made possible by viewers like you) just in time to see the final award, the one for best 3DS eshop title!!! Now as someone who never saw the point of indie titles, electronic goods & services, or indeed the entire handheld platform as a whole, this wasn't of immediate interest to me... But all of that changed when confronted with the winner: Devil Band - Rock The Underworld!!!
A seamless port from the DSiWare service, this rhythmic title will be sure to rock your world too, if only you give it a chance!


It has a leveling system to accompany its catchy MIDI tunes

Well that's all the glimpses of the future I, Evan_B, was able to catch before being syzzurped back to boring old 2017. Oh one final piece of advice, Aries, stay clear of vengeful Pisces!!! But hey the future looks hella promising guys, just wish Our Galactic Overlord would allow everyone to sleep with dry bedding perhaps.

Peach out!

[Evan_B]

I appreciated all the references, really. This is better organized than some of my actual stuff.

But uh, I don't know if I'll ever consider playing a JRPG. I mean, I tried out Tokyo Mirage Sessions and it told me I was a filthy casual, so I just shrugged my shoulders and, you know, went with it! I don't usually appreciate that sort of thing in a game, but the fact that Atlus went out of their way to include such an option, something I thought was normally reserved for Nintendo's platformers like Super Mario Galaxy and Donkey Kong Country, well, I just knew I had to get to the end.

[Order.RSS]

Hahahaha perfect! 

Had totally forgotten about those how-to-play DVDs. They were dvds right? On a system that couldn't play dvds?

[Evan_B]

I was referencing the "Super" modes that play through the level for you.

God, you're so stupid, Evan_B.

[Order.RSS]

Ah gotcha! I, Evan_B the elite pro ranked mode superclan McUltra gamer had merely temporarily forgotten the name of this feature I never used, apologies! But I'm glad it exists so that noobertroopers like yourself can still see the endings, Steefosaurus, and pretend to be good at games by waggling unconnected controllers in case someone passes by. An essential feature for you certainly, as there's no such thing as a website where one might gawk at video walkthroughs or something.

[Evan_B]

But really, I appreciate the lengths you took to keep up my persona.

I'm not sure if it was intentional or not, but I did unabashedly enjoy Lost Reavers.

[Order.RSS]

But really, I appreciate the lengths you took to keep up my persona.

I'm not sure if it was intentional or not, but I did unabashedly enjoy Lost Reavers.

Oh hahaha really? Yeah no I just went for a vague take on your rpg thread, and these were the first two poorly reviewed titles with rpg elements I thought of. Never tried either of them, maybe I'll download Lost Reavers to give it a go on a free evening sometime then.

Fun coincidence though so just pretend it was intentional!

[Khushrenada]

Do I still win the World's Best Gamer Award again?

[Evan_B]

Never

Ever

[Khushrenada]

Well, that is... unfortunate. But at least I know not to bother sending in any bribe money for the award this year. Looks like I just saved myself $50.00. Woo-hoo!