After the smashing success of the iPod, iMac, I, Robot, Ikea, iTunes, iPhone, Wii, and DSi, Nintendo President Reggie Fils-Aime has decided to eliminate all the "excessive" letters 'a' through 'h,' and 'j' through 'z' in the upcoming years.While the highly aggressive Fils-Aime is known for taking names in general, this appears to be the most comprehensive simplification of the advertisement and product identification process to date. The long inevitable move would also leave only variations of the letter 'i' to communicate, though the company's marketing president himself seems ready for the transition:
"I ithink in ithe ilong irun, it iwon't ireally imatter, ibecause iNinendo's igames ireally ihave isuch ia ibroad irange iof iappeal, ifrom ifive, to ininety-ifive, ior 'i' ito 'z'. iThe igaming ienthusiast ithat ibuys ia itremendous iamount iof igames icontaining imany idifferent iletters is itruly insatiable. iWe ibelieve itoday ithat iwe ihave ishown ia iplethora iof igames ifull iof iwords ithat ican isatisfy ithe imost icasual ito ithe imost icore.
iThe iletter 'i' is imore ithan iadequate ifor inaming ifuture iNintendo ihardware. iBesides, ijust imagine ihow imuch ink iwe'll ibe iable ito isave ion instruction imanuals iand iboxart."
Needless to say, forums across the country were sent into a total meltdown -- yet this wacky new idea already seemed to seep into the subconscious. A small sample:
I really can't fathom how such insane ideas get into Iwata's imagination; it's idiotic, impractical and probably illegal. Where can I go to get inoculated indefinitely from such intentional inanity???!!1i
While it's perfectly legitimate to wonder where gaming would be today if Mario Is Missing would've been spelled as " i I i i ," game designer Shigeru Miyamoto iterated that players should give the new changes a chance before dismissing them outright:
"I iiiii iiiii iiiiiii iiii iiiiiiiii iiiiiii iiii iiiiii iiiiii iiiiii iiiiiii iiiiiii iiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiii iiii iiii iiiii iiiiiiii iiiiiii. Iii iiiii iiiiiiii iiii iiiiiii, iii iiiiiiii, iii iii iiiiiiiii... iiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiii iiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii! Iii'i iiii iiiiiii iiiiiiiii? Iiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiii iii ii iiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiii iiiii."
"...Iiiiii iiiii iiii iiiiiiiii iiiii iiiiiii iiiii iiii iiiiiii iiiiii iiiii iiiiii iiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiii iiiiiiiii iiiiiiii. Iiiiiiiiii [iiiiiiii] iiiii ii iiii ii iiiiiii ii iiiiiiii iiiiiii iiiiiiiii Iiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiii iiiiiii iiiiii ii ii iii iiiiiiii iiiii iii iiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiii iiiiiiii iiii iiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiii iiii."
Expict thi chinge ii i fuiiy in iffict ii Dicimbir 3i, 20ii. Ni wiid yii iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii or i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i, bit risi issiriid Niniindi Wiiii Ripiii wiii hiii aii ihi iaiisi.
Topic: iNOA to Phase Out Most of English Alphabet By 20ii (Read 1528 times)
