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« on: May 16, 2003, 07:11:34 AM »
Heck, you know what? I imagine that, that could be true. I'm just stating my own opinion. But from my own experience, and having two Girlfriends, who when I met at first were "Clinically Depressed" as was stated by their doctors, and having over half of my friends being "Clinically Depressed" as well, and then me just talking to them and trying to understand why each of us were depressed, I figured out, that it is (Once again, in my opinion) all in your head. You could be having a great day and everything is going super, and yet you still feel like crap. Yeah I had those a lot too. Everyday for three years, and if I actually stopped pretenting to the people around me that my life was ok, and started acting the way I truly felt, I imagine I would have been thrown into a hospital and fed medication, being told that its a chemical imballance, because I was contimplating suicide everyday, until one day, I was to the point, with weither I would do it or not. So you know what you are talking about, and so do I.
And after a few long nights partying with my friends and/or talking to my gf's at the time, about our problems, I told them how I thought about the whole thing, how I figured it is all just a state of mind, which technically it is, and that you just have to start planning your life and living the way you want to live. Even though i was depressed all the time and my life was great as could be at the same time, I wasn't really doing what I wanted to do with my life. Not only that, but the idiots in school or around you in your life, who like to make your life difficult, do not help things.
Medication is not going to help you get out of it. Like I said, most of my friends were on soome form of medication for their depression, and I just started to introduce them into new ways of thinking.
But my depression is a chemical thing, passed down from my parent's genetics, so I will just sit here and take these drugs and that will be it. I'll be using them for the rest of my life, and will dull down who I really am inside, but there you go. The medication is also another reason for your depression.
There you are. Taking mediation for something that you feel you can not beat on your own. How depressing is that? Hell, that would keep me in the dumps all the time. I'm one of those people who feel that if I can't do it on my own, then what's the point? Sure if I break a bone or something like that and need cruches, so be it..... it's temporary. But if I am going to be depressed all my life, then should I take some medication that hides it from me, everyday, for the rest of my life, or face what and who I truly am and make my body and mind my own and live in peace for the rest of my life?
To tell you the truth, almost all of my friends now that were on medication or were depressed, are no longer depressed or on medication. Why? Because they face their issues, and decided to say "Ok, what am I going to do about it? I am depressed but I have no reason..... maybe i am not looking hard enough, or maybe I am not really wanting to know why I really am depressed." Or maybe "Ok, everything is down in the dumps. I am failing school. I have no friends who I can really trust or talk to, I have people who torment me everyday, or try and beat the crap out of me, My parents act like they hate me..... etc. What am i going to do about it and how will I change it."
Most will answer back "Nothing. I can't do anything about it, because I'm stupid and I'm usless." or "All these people make fun of me, or there is too many, I can't take them all on, they do this to me, because there must be somthing wrong with me." or whatever sentance or saying you want to put here, put it here, not forget about it and all that crap in this paragraph, and really think about the most logical solution to each individual problem or situation, no matter how small or how big. Then I could just start typing out all the stuff I posted before right here, onto how to continue to solve your problems.
The main thing is. Those who are on medication for their depression, fear their depression, or even more, they fear themselves and what they might do to themselves, if they go off it. The mind is probably one of the most complex devices in the Universe. It can damage itself and it can also heal itself. it can grow and yet stay the same size. It can also be modified for the way you live and experience life. My friends think the way I do about depression now. I thought that I would have never lived passed the age of 14, and here I am at 23.
Do I know what I am talking about? Yes I do. I went through it too. Sure there are differant forms of depression, and they can all be beaten. but you know what? A person can only do so much for another. Like I said, it's something that a person has to deal with on their own.
If you feel that you are perfectly fine, taking medication throughout your life, and you can live a normal life at the same time, by all means. More power to you, and I won't think of you any differantly (But what would it matter how I thought of you, and why would you care?) Do with your life as you see fit. But I am glad and happy about how I decided to go about my life. There is not one thing I regret, there is not one thing in my life that I am afraid of or ashamed of. My lif is my life, and I am proud to be living it, because there is only one life, that is like mine, which is mine, itself. We are living to experience and learn all that we can. Humans are an exploritive species in the universe. To me, all the good things in life, all the bad things in life, all the pain, all the pleasure, every sentance that I speak or type, all the people in my life I meet, all the things I ever done in my life, Made me who I am today and are all experiences that I have explored. And in all my good attributes and all my bad faults, I am I, and I regret nothing. Without doing what I have done in my life, I would have been less of a person.
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