I’ve got some blond jokes.
A blond, a brunette, and a redhead go into the bathroom at a restaurant. The women's room attendant tells them that inside there is a magic mirror, and if you say something truthful, a wish will be granted- however, if what they say is untruthful they will be sucked into the mirror for all eternity.. The brunette walks up to the mirror and says "I think I'm the prettiest" and a load of cash suddenly appears at her feet. The redhead says "I think I'm the smartest" and keys to a new car appear in her hand. The blond walks up to the mirror, says "I think-" and was promptly sucked into the mirror.
A blond a brunette and a redhead are walking in the forest. The brunette points and says "Look, a dead bird!" The redhead says "Cool!", and the blond looks at the sky and says "Where?"
A ventriloquist is performing for a full house and is telling the audience some blond jokes. After a while a woman stands up and says "I think what you're saying is extremely rude and offensive and you should be ashamed of yourself." Slightly embarrassed the ventriloquist apologizes to the woman. "I'm not talking to you," the woman tells him, "I'm talking to the guy on your knee."
Q: Why does the blond want to be a psychiatrist?
A: She heard you get a couch and can charge by the hour.
A blond really wants to sell her car, but it has too many miles on it to get a serious buyer. Discouraged, the blond asks here brunette friend for help. "It's okay," the brunette tells her, "My boyfriend can roll back the odometer." The blond accepts and gives the brunette her car who returns it several days later. After a few weeks the brunette asks here if anyone has bought her car. The blond quickly replies "I'm not selling a car with that few miles!"
A brunette and her boyfriend are riding in a truck and their blond friend is sitting in the bed. While going over a bridge, the brunette's boyfriend looses control and drives off the edge. After a few seconds, the brunette and her boyfriend appear at the top of the water and swim to shore. They wait 15 minutes for the blond, who finally gets to the surface of the water. "What took you so long?" they asked here, to which she replied "I couldn't get the tailgate open."
You guys have probably heard this one, but it's still good:
A brunette and a blond inherit a cattle ranch from a rich uncle, but he only had one cow left. They decide to buy another bull but need to look for sellers. The brunette agrees to search for potential owners and tells the blond she'll send here a telegram to bring the truck to get the bull. Eventually the brunette finds someone willing to sell a bull and she goes to send the telegram to the blond. The operator tells her it's 90 cents for each word, and the brunette only has a dollar. After much deliberation, she tells the operator to send the word "comfortable". The operator asks why and the brunette responds "She's a blond- she'll sound it out".
Topic: Best blonde joke EVER! (Read 4589 times)
