In this, the third installment of The Deal Machine, we have the first appearance of DS titles!  For those of you who are unaware, The Deal Machine is a tool I built back in May to generate a list of "good" games that are affordable.  For consideration the game has to be cheap (under $20 for Wii, under $15 for DS) and at least "good" (6 is the lowest press average I'll accept).  Once The Deal Machine, a.k.a. "Dealy," generates a list of games meeting these criteria, it randomly selects four games from its list.  For better or worse, I have no say in the final four selections.  In May that meant that a lot of Nintendo first party titles were selected, more than I would have liked to see used in a single month.  In June it meant that I was given a list that I dubbed "gaming for sociopaths", with four games that all had some misanthropic qualities.  I'm beginning to regret turning over all the decisions to a machine.

I've decided to adopt a variation of the approach this month.  No previous Deal Machine has included a DS game, due entirely to my own mistakes.  I've decided to compensate for this oversight with a value-sized Deal Machine this month.  For July we have six games - four for Wi and two for DS - for your fiscally responsible gaming pleasure.

Let's get started!

Nancy Drew: The White Wolf of Icicle Creek - Did I mention I have no say in this list?

Nancy Drew, everyone's favorite teenage super-sleuth, made the move from books to point-and-click adventure titles years ago.  Previously the domain of the PC, the point-and-click genre has seen a bit of a renaissance of late, especially on Wii.  Last month we featured another point-and-click series, Sam and Max.  In this month's point-and-clicker there is much less comedy and much more domestic servitude.  A lodge nestled deep in the Rockies has found itself beset by one inexplicable accident after another; the locals have determined that these accidents are the work of a curse brought on by the titular White Wolf.  Apparently unconvinced by this completely logical explanation, Ms. Drew concludes that these accidents have a more human cause.  Stupid kids.

In order to investigate these incidents she takes a job in housekeeping at the lodge.  This means that not only do you get to click around the Rockies in order to solve a murderous mystery, but you also get to engage in exciting chores such as cleaning and cooking within a time limit.  Way to challenge gender stereotypes, guys.

Are you ready for round two?

Monster Lab - A mix of a fighting game and a mini-game collection, Monster Lab is a bit of a...Frankenstein's Monster of a game.  In his review, staff alumnus Nick DiMola explained the game's story as follows: "Players assume the role of Professor Fuseless' latest apprentice who is fighting to stop the evil Baron Mharti, who is using his evil science to oppress the Mad Science Alliance and reign the Uncanny Valley at large."  With a narrative like that, my Frankenstein's Monster pun doesn't look so bad now, does it?

In Monster Lab you create your monsters in Professor Fuseless' lab by combining parts (arms, torsos, heads, etc.) and playing mini-games on the various machines to animate your horrible creation.  Once you're done playing God you take your monsters into battle, exploring various locales within the Uncanny Valley and defeating the monsters that reside therein. Not only do you get to play God by creating new life, you get to wipe-out existing life too!

Death and destruction, so give me something nice Dealy!

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen – Michael Bay's second Transformer movie set new standards for storytelling and dramatic appeal in cinema.  Having a stirring romantic subplot for female audiences, and an exciting story of conflict for male viewers, it manages to provide something for everyone.  Of course, the last two sentences were bold-faced lies.  Revenge of the Fallen, the film, is CG robots fighting each other with CG explosions ripping up CG sets, with non-CG Shai LaBeouf yelling "STOP!" a lot.  It's pretty much the cinematic limit for Bay.

Revenge of the Fallen, the game, is a linear robot beat-'em up.  You go through stages, punch and shoot robots, and they blow up.  Besides the story - which our own Zachary Miller notes the specifics of which do not carry over from the movie - it is pretty much the perfect depiction of a Michael Bay film.  The game also features vehicle sequences in which your Transformer gets to do thing like drive on the highway and fly.  Transportation games.

It's time for game four.

Spider-Man: Web of Shadows – Another pull, another licensed game.  Web of Shadows is another beat-'em up, this time with the victim of a terrible lab experiment versus animated vehicle robots.  In Web of Shadows you get missions from other, apparently busy, super heroes and then proceed to beat the ever-living hell out of waves of enemies.  In his review, Neal Ronaghan notes that the story missions are more interesting than the generic beat-'em up I described above, providing objectives beyond "destroy X number of enemies."  The game allows you to pick between two Spider-Man suits: his traditional (and festive) blue and red suit and the symbiotic (and emo) black suit.  The red and blue suit allows for more agility, whereas the black suit has more power.  Both suits have their own skills you can level up.  Beyond pummeling, Spider-Man can coat his foes in webbing and heave them around.

Dealy, hit me with some DS love!

Feel the Magic XY/XX – Not that kind of love, Deal Machine.

A launch title for the DS, Feel the Magic is a colorful adventure in...touching things.  The original DS mini-game collection features a whacked-out story of a young man trying to court a beautiful woman.  To do so he has to confront challenges like stampeding bulls, swallowing goldfish, and digging treasure up out of the sand.  With success you earn "love points", and collecting 100 of them unlocks a new set of challenges and the next phase of the story.  Not content to let the strangeness end there, the game's presentation features silhouetted characters cast against a colorful world.  Our young lover is cheered on by the original DS cheer-squad "The Rub Rabbits", a very strange group of men waiting to help those in need. 

The game received a similarly odd sequel (it's actually a prequel, if you can fathom such a thing) in 2006 called The Rub Rabbits!. Alarmingly, the Japanese title of the sequel translates to "Where Do Babies Come From?". 

If only a single word of that was a joke...

Seeing as it is probably very difficult to secure this almost six year-old game, I think it's best I just declare victory and get out of here before things get stranger.

One last time, Deal Machine!

Ninjatown – The last stop in our strange journey takes us to the least inviting village in existence.  If you ever see a highway sign that says "Ninjatown - Next Right", I encourage you to keep driving.  Thankfully, Ninjatown is actually a game about a village of cute chibi ninja, who have to protect their cookie recipe from evil ninjas.  I'm serious.  See?

It's actually a very solid tower defense game.  You have to try to keep the evil ninja out, and the ones that get in must be dealt with before they make their escape.  Your primary method of defending your cookies is your ninja populace.  The game features eight types of ninja, each with their own strengths and weaknesses.  You use them by placing huts in each stage, and these huts produce your ninja.  Huts are purchased and upgraded via the cookies that you're so valiantly trying to defend, which calls into question the cost/benefit analysis skills of ninjas.  

Six games for under a total of $90.  You can't beat those kinds of randomly selected bargains.  Until next month, dealers!