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Messages - Halbred

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1151
NWR Forums Discord / Re: Breasts
« on: August 13, 2011, 09:31:29 PM »
HOW HAVE I BEEN MISSING THIS?!?

I'm kind of a breast snob. I feel like women with anything lower than a C-cup are wasting money on bras. Gravity isn't going to affect them, push-up bras are false advertising, and bras DO cost money.

Also, Sofia Vergara. Goddamn. Internet points to the first person who can find and post that GIF of her on Modern Family making chocolate milk.

1152
Movies & TV / Re: Rate the last TV show you've seen
« on: August 13, 2011, 09:21:29 PM »
So, I finally finished Lost. It was a fairly good series, all-in-all. The ending was a bit weird to me though. It was just weird to see that was where all the alternate reality flashes were headed after watching them for how ever long they were going on. I did like how they kinda gave you the ending you were expecting, then changed it a bit to "shock" you and then give you a third ending that was supposed to kinda tie things together. Though, one thing I didn't like was the fact that the show was just like, "Well, a bunch of **** happens next, but since Jack dies, we're just gonna end the story now.

My big problem with the show was that they tried to cram ALL THE ANSWERS into the final few episodes, but actually just chickened out of most of them. Like why the island can move, what's being corked, who built that statue, all that stuff. No answers for it. So disappointed.

1153
TalkBack / Re: Dead or Alive Dimensions Offers New Costumes Once More
« on: August 12, 2011, 10:03:29 PM »
I can attest that only one costume--for Kasumi--is worthwhile. LOL

1154
TalkBack / Zach's Gaming Stuff: K'nex Mario Kart
« on: August 08, 2011, 11:21:34 PM »

Mario on a motorcycle? Ridiculous!

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/blog/27384

I didn't realize that K'nex was in the Mario Kart business, but there this was one day at Target. Mario and Luigi were both available on little motorcycles, and they also had larger, more expensive Karts (Yoshi also got a Kart). There were also K'nex-based course building kits involving fireballs and Thwomps. You can even go online and print out tracks pieces. Well, I wasn't going to let this fad pass me by. I played with K'nex like crazy as a kid and I was curious to see how the brand had survived in a land ruled by LEGO and, sadly enough, Mega Bloks. I also got a nifty Mario motorcycle out of the deal. All for $8!

The back of the box is nicely illustrated, showing other things you can buy and where you can print out those track pieces. One wonders how sturdy a paper ramp is. Probably not very.

Ah, this set contains Mario in sort-of-but-not-really minifigure form, and a bunch of K'nex blocks. And apparently LEGO blocks.

"Damn those Blue Shells!"

Five minutes of construction later, and we have Mario sitting on a bitchin' red motorcycle made up of 10% K'nex spokes and bars, and 90% LEGO knockoff pieces! Whoo!

It's actually a pretty sweet deal, and I might spring for the Luigi bike just to have both brothers. Target is constantly having sales, so maybe I'll get Yoshi's Kart one of these days. Cool, huh?


1155
Movies & TV / Re: Rate the last movie you've seen
« on: August 07, 2011, 02:43:28 AM »
In response to that, I give you Cars and Cars 2.

1156
General Chat / Re: The Movie Idea Thread
« on: August 05, 2011, 11:00:48 PM »
Power Girl movie based on the first six issues or so of her solo title run. With Ultra-Humanite.

Cast Diora Baird in the lead role.

It writes itself.

1157
TalkBack / Re: The Indefensible Position: Stop Reducing Lara's Rack
« on: August 05, 2011, 09:55:44 PM »
The real point is that Crystal Dynamics keeps upping and downing her cup size, simultaneously making Lara chesty and apologizing for it. My feeling is that Lara's always had big breasts, it's a part of her character, deal with it, but they could also make her more modestly-sized, and I wouldn't have a problem with it, but THEY NEED TO STICK WITH ONE OR THE OTHER.

It's also a question of character design. There's a reason people freaked out about Wonder Woman's new costume even though it was more practical and less skin-showy. It just wasn't her for the last 70 years.* That's how I feel about Lara.

*DC may be a bad example. They seem to be going through some kind of mid-life crisis right now.

1158
TalkBack / The Indefensible Position: Stop Reducing Lara's Rack
« on: August 05, 2011, 02:48:15 PM »

They've become a part of her character. Accept it and move on.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/blog/27357

You rarely hear cries from the readers, much less the artists and writers, that Power Girl’s characteristic bust be toned down or that her trademark “cleavage window” be closed. It’s not often you read magazine articles in Entertainment Weekly or TV Guide bemoaning Sofia Vergara’s wardrobe on Modern Family. But people always get bent out of shape about poor Lara Croft. When Crystal Dynamics thankfully took over the franchise from Core Design in 2003, they spent three years crafting Tomb Raider Legend, and one of their bullet points while redesigning her character was to tone down her most mammalian organs, that which had been partially responsible for her success and infamy as a character. This was a priority—the thinking was that by making Lara more realistic, she’d be more relatable, and more people would buy the game. Legend was a success, but probably not because of Lara’s breast reduction—more likely because the game was actually good.

Crystal Dynamics claims they shored up Lara's assets for TR: Legend, then proceeded to show as much of those assets as possible. Compromise noted.

The follow-up to Legend, Tomb Raider Anniversary, restored Lara’s endowments and even added some subtle visual jiggle, something we hadn’t seen yet in a Tomb Raider game. However, unlike the previous game, Lara wore no split evening gowns or cleavage-baring tops. Instead, her wardrobe choices seem purposefully conservative. You might say these factors cancel each other out, but the aftermath of this decision is unclear—I don’t remember anybody bitching and whining that Lara was once again able to comfortably fill her bra, but Crystal Dynamics must have been unhappy with the direction Lara was going (again) because they covered her up entirely in 2009’s Tomb Raider Underworld. In fact, I might suggest that Lara’s costumes in that game actually downplay her chest. If Crystal Dynamics was going for realism, I applaud them while also pointing out that there’s nothing realistic about a 30-something Lara Croft plowing her motorcycle through ancient subterranean ruins while battling giant albino spiders and undead warriors. Tomb Raider has never been realistic—it’s a cartoon.

There was a Wii version, as you'll recall. This is Lara's normal outfit in the game, and also the one that shows off the subtle jiggle effects. Again, kind of a contradiction.

More confusing still, Crystal Dynamics actually reneged on their “more realistic” Lara with Xbox 360 DLC. The downloadable level “Beneath the Ashes” includes not only a fairly simplistic new area, but also several new costumes for Lady Croft, including three or four revealing bikinis in different colors. One might say this was the developer apologizing for the main game’s complete lack of cleavage, or caving to the Croft purists, while simultaneously revealing an inherent contradiction in their design philosophy: to titillate or not to titillate? That is the question, and it’s one Crystal Dynamics can’t seem to decide on.

You'd think Lara's V-neck top would show some cleavage, but it really doesn't. This is puzzling.

It would appear Crystal Dynamics is once more rebooting Lara’s adventures. Fresh out of her Alma Mater, Lara will be shipwrecked on an island, suffering grievous injuries in the process, and will have to find food, supplies, and help during her stay. Her character model has changed considerably, almost to the point of not really looking like Lara Croft anymore. The ponytail is gone. The sharp eyes and calm demeanor have been replaced by a disposition much more panicky. She’s wearing cargo pants. Her breasts really are significantly smaller, more “realistic,” you might say. And maybe this is fine for what they’re trying to accomplish—gritty realism, island survival, and lots of bandage application. But you’re taking away everything that’s made Lara, well, Lara for the last fifteen years.

I love it, sure, but it muddies Crystal Dynamics' intent with the character, doesn't it?

Lara Croft has a ponytail. She’s cool under pressure and happy to leap around stone-age citadels. She wears ass-hugging shorts and she has a big rack. It’s not Mai Shiranui big, it’s just big. And you know what? That’s okay, because there are plenty of real-life women with big breasts. I married one. The internet is filled with them. They exist. Western game developers need to stop apologizing for giving their heroines attractive assets. Should male gamers start ballyhooing over Nathan Drake’s chiseled good looks, or Kratos’ sculpted abs? Physical features are part of what make a character recognizable and iconic. Lara has her ponytail, short shorts, and bosomy bosom. Crystal Dynamics needs to get over that and recognize the sad fact that their new Tomb Raider game could be a completely new IP and nobody would know the difference. Once you take away everything you helped Lara become over the last five years, that character ceases to be Lara Croft.

Notice that in the Batman reboot, Bruce didn't start wearing anything other than the batsuit.


1159
Reader Reviews / Re: Rate The Last Game You Played
« on: August 03, 2011, 05:37:19 PM »
Lithium, you should play Aria and Dawn of Sorrow. They're bettter introductions to the modern Castlevania. Order of Ecclesia, while excellent, is basically for Castlevania fans who want a meaty challenge but area already familiar with the formula. You're got a leg up now, so you might appreciate Aria/Dawn even more.

1160
TalkBack / Re: Super Mario Bros. Deluxe
« on: August 01, 2011, 11:02:41 PM »
If you like all these games, if you like mario and luigi, why don't you like Paper Mario?

Because Paper Mario is Fischer Price's My First RPG for Babies.

1161
Movies & TV / Re: Rate the last TV show you've seen
« on: July 29, 2011, 02:09:26 AM »
Been watching "How I Met Your Mother." Actually, we've seen all the DVD's released now.

The central conceit of the show is getting old. Reveal the damn mother, already. It's otherwise a good show, not great, but Neil Patrick Harris is awesome (loved his "Suit" song) and the rest of the cast, especially Jason Segal, is strong, too. Robin is GORGEOUS but needs to gain some weight and...grow some...you know what I'm gonna say. It's not a show for everybody, but it's definately funny, but in a different way than something like Seinfeld or Modern Family.

1162
Movies & TV / Re: Rate the last movie you've seen
« on: July 29, 2011, 02:06:05 AM »
@Broodwars

I think I said it before, but I didn't like one...single...art design decision in the entire film. I also don't agree, philosophically, with bringing any version of Alice in Wonderland and/or Through the Looking Glass onto the big screen and try to give it a coherent story or, God forbid, CONNECT the two books--which are entirely different books. Both are certainly meant to be noncohesive dream sequences, so when you try and get a big central narrative going, it's going to fail, at least for me.

Also for those of you who have fond rememberances of the ancient Disney movie, go back and watch it. You'll find that 90% is needless filler.

1163
Podcast Discussion / Re: Newscast Lite: Ambassador's Edition
« on: July 29, 2011, 02:01:11 AM »
GC got a price cut six months in? I don't remember that at all.

1164
I sense a Newscast special feature discussion. I refuse to reveal mine until I'm on the air.

(Wii is not #1)

1165
General Gaming / Re: Xbox Live Arcade General Discussion
« on: July 29, 2011, 01:55:01 AM »
Too bad it didn't come out on PS3. ;-)

I'm a little annoyed about how much certain games cost. Portal and Shadow Complex are $15 apiece.

1166
TalkBack / Super Mario Bros. Deluxe
« on: July 28, 2011, 03:13:51 AM »

Best version of SMB EVAR!

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/extralife/27283

The Game Boy Color was a wonderful device that had awesome games, Links Awakening DX and Shantae among them. But there was also Super Mario Bros. DX, a “deluxe” port of that granddaddy sidescroller that took the original game and heaped additional content upon it such that even SMB masters would find plenty to do, especially if you had a Game Boy Printer. This was Super Mario Bros. turned up to eleven, packed to Blooper gills with modes and unlockables.

Oh, the original game is in there, of course, but there’s also a challenge mode. You must achieve a certain high score in every stage AND find Red Coins and a Yoshi Egg in every stage! Nefarious! Better still, accruing a certain aggregate score in the main game (an easy feat for any hardened Nintendo vet) unlocked The Lost Levels (though not called that). It was modified to be easier than the original game or the Super Mario All-Stars version. But oh yes, dear readers, I beat that game. I beat it hard. Another points-based unlock is You vs. Boo, in which the player must race a Boo through several customized stages filled with obstructions. Beating one Boo unlocks its much-faster successor, so this mode proved quite challenging.

The “Toy Box” area of the game involved a fortune-telling card game, a calendar (GBC  as Blackberry), and several pictures that one could print out on the Game Boy Printer, even to the point where you could make little comics—text bubbles include—featuring the Mario characters. The better you do in challenge mode, the more pictures you unlock. One other nice feature in the Toy Box is the Yoshi Egg Roulette. Spin the wheel, and a screenshot from a random stage will pop up to give you some indication of where the Yoshi Egg is in that stage. Very helpful!

Finally, there was an awesome two-player mode. Memory fails me as to whether players had to use the link cable or whether the IR sensor was sufficient, but the mode was basically like You vs. Boo without the Boo, and Mario and Luigi raced through the customized stages in an effort to be the best there ever was.

Now, the game did suffer from one flaw: because of the GBC’s resolution, the game appeared to be a little too “zoomed-in,” so you’d have to hold various buttons to scroll the screen left, right, up and down to really see everything. However, it really wasn’t a hassle, and being so familiar with the original game, I never really found it necessary. It certainly needed to be done during The Lost Levels, though, as I was completely unfamiliar with that sequel at the time.

The game’s not terribly hard to find and it’s one of the best offerings on the Game Boy Color—a system I wish I still had a working version of. You may recall that Nintendo tried to create an independent “Virtual Console” on the GBA by releasing several “NES Classics,” including Super Mario Bros., the two NES Zelda games, and the original Castlevania. I was stupid enough to buy them all except SMB, because I had the superior version already (and it worked fine on GBA). If you stumble over a copy of SMB DX, I recommend picking it up without a second thought—it’s the best version of that game.


1167
Podcast Discussion / Re: Episode 95: Canine Take Your Order?
« on: July 27, 2011, 12:13:27 AM »
Three for Five, baby!

1168
If Baten Kaitos wins, I will give up on all of you, and suggest an Inevitable RetroActive Rule: if an RPG is present on a RetroActive poll, it will undoubtedly win, no matter its calibur.

Star Wars, goddamnit. It looks better than most Wii games. Also, it's STAR WARS.

1169
TalkBack / Pokédex 3D FAIL
« on: July 24, 2011, 07:08:38 PM »

You might never actually catch 'em all.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/blog/27251

My Pokédex 3D stopped downloading Pokemon the other day. This was a complete surprise, since I'd scanned every AR Marker available on the Internet back when the app first came out, and I was getting three Pokémon a day: two in the morning, one after work. It ran like clockwork, until yesterday. Yesterday, my 3DS got no Pokémon, despite missing four of the elemental monkeys and several different forms of existing Pokémon, like Deering or Sawbuck. Some internet research turned up some annoying findings: without other people who also have Pokédex 3D, I'll never have a complete Unova Pokédex.

Turns out, there are certain Pokémon you can only have one form of, or one kind of, and the rest you have to get by trading with friends (with the "Give/Receive" function in the menu). Here's a list of Pokémon that you'll only get one form of:

Deering, Sawbuck, Frillish, Jellicent, and Unfezant

That leaves three versions of Deering and Sawbuck, and one version each of the other three for you to get by trading. Furthermore, you'll only get one of the elemental monkeys and its evolution. I got Pansear and Simisear, but if I want Pansage, Panpour, Simisear, and Simipour, I'm gonna have to go do some beggin'. Finally, and this is the best part, you'll never get six Pokemon through SpotPass--you have to get them by scanning AR markers: Victini, Cobalion, Terrakion, Virizian, Reshiram, and Zekrom. It's not difficult to find an AR Marker website, so don't fret, but it's still a raw deal.

I understand this is Nintendo's way of adding typical Nintendo trading functionality to this useless app, but in North America, especially ALASKA, it's just not gonna happen. I can only hope these missing forms are downloadable via SpotPass in the future, because I hate to see missing Pokémon in my 3D Pokédex.


1170
TalkBack / Re: Stop Going to GameStop
« on: July 16, 2011, 02:17:34 AM »
Inherent contradiction noted. This post was fueled by rage and exhaustion.

1171
TalkBack / Stop Going to GameStop
« on: July 16, 2011, 01:52:06 AM »

Have you seen the Best Buy across the street?

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/blog/27188

Dear GameStop,

Your stores are poorly organized.

They offer a cheap-looking mish-mash of games strewn about the store on racks—never shelves—and in glass cases. The glass cases are reserved for used GBA and DS games that didn’t come with cases or, in most instances, instruction manuals. Half your stock of used…I’m sorry…”pre-owned” games are in generic DVD boxes with really awful GameStop art on the sleeve. It is not reversible. The game’s title is often written in marker. There is no manual. You are selling it for well over the $10 it’s probably worth. Your back room must be such a travesty that employees simply can’t find what they’re looking for, as trips to this mythical storage facility almost always end in disappointment and tears. It would be nice if you alphabetized your PSP games, too.

You are a criminal.

You take games—sometimes new—for store credit, and you give people pennies on the dollar. Then you turn right around and charge, say, $55 for that same game, despite acknowledging that it’s “pre-owned.” You offer some kind of points-based benefit card for a fee, of course, and you tell customers that they can use the points to buy games, accessories, even game systems. The trick is that like Club Nintendo, you have to spend infinitely more than whatever eventual purchase you make based on those points is actually worth. You still sell PS2 games, and I’m talking ancient PS2 games, for up to and including $20. You sell caseless, manual-less GBA and DS games for sometimes the same price. This is highway robbery and you know it. Additionally, all the money one spends on used games at GameStop goes directly to GameStop; not a single penny goes to the developer or publisher. That copy of Uncharted 2 you bought used for $55? Naughty Dog doesn’t see a dime of that. Shouldn’t they see a dime? They did a really good job with that game. GameStop is basically taking that hard-earned dime.

You are unreliable.

“Want to pre-order a game?” Sure, I’ll pre-order Super Mario Galaxy 2 just to shut you up so I can leave. I’ve accrued $50 in store credit over three years of selling you my old games, so why not? I’ve always been told that pre-ordering the game I want is the only way I’m guaranteed to get it. So when the day of happiness comes, that joyful Sunday when Super Mario Galaxy 2 launches, I march right into GameStop and am told that, unfortunately, they didn’t get as many pre-orders as they thought they would, and my name is too far down the list, so I won’t be getting one. Thanks, guys. There’ve also been times—more than once—where I called ahead, asked if they have a game in stock, and was told yes. Can you put it behind the counter for me? I’m only ten minutes away. “Sure, we can do that!” Well, guess what happens when I get to the store. They forgot about it, and now it’s gone, or they actually didn’t have it in the first place, the computer just said they did, oops! “I can’t be bothered to go see if it’s actually here or not.” Thanks again, guys.

You are incredibly annoying.

What an Edge card? Oh, you have one? This is the free card. Do you want the points-based card? It only costs $10 a year! You get points, which you can use to buy games and accessories in like six years if you buy from us exclusively! No? Alright, then. Do you want to pre-order a game? I’ve heard that L.A. Noire is going to be amazing. Oh, not a big Rockstar fan, huh? Well, Portal 2 is on the horizon too, and it’s going to be super-popular. If you want to make sure you get a copy, you’d better pre-order. Alright, let me just ring you up, here. Hey, do you want to grab the strategy guide for this game? No? Okay, that will be $25 for Metroid Prime 2: Echoes. No, sorry, we don’t have a case or manual.

Best Buy is right around the corner.

People don’t seem to realize this. In most large cities, and even here in Anchorage, there is a magical place called Best Buy. In this blue-tinted fairyland, you can walk through video game aisles unhindered by obnoxious, nagging posters reminding you to “PRE-ORDER TODAY!” or giant 3DS boxes with completely conceptual art on the cover. You can select a game from their many gaming-related aisles and—I know you won’t believe this—take it to the front counter and just buy it without being interrogated. Then you can leave. There have been a few times where a cashier has asked if I wanted scratch protection, and of course I told them to suck it, but other than that, my game-shopping experience at Best Buy has always been quick and to the point. Other retailers sell games as well: Wal-Mart, Fred Meyer, and even Target stock and actively advertise games in their Sunday newspaper ads. Toys R Us often has insane deals on games. It’s a brave new world, one in which nobody ever has to go into a GameStop ever again.

This is a strategy I would advise all of you readers to take up. If you have credit at GameStop—more than you care to lose—just go use it up. If you like the idea of selling your old games for some kind of monetary exchange, there ARE other options. Sell them to your friends or on Craigslist. Sell them on eBay or Goozex. Hell, you can trade stuff in at some comic shops and even Best Buy. The problem with GameStop, Play ‘n’ Trade, and even Best Buy is that by exchanging your stuff with them, you are tying yourself to their store. That means that if Play ‘n’ Trade isn’t getting Ocarina of Time 3D in until two days after launch, too effing bad (they even suggested that, if I want it on launch day, I should go to a different store). This poses no advantage to me.

I’d have to buy new if I wanted it on launch day, but this wasn’t something I was itching to do. Like many of us, money is consistently tight from month to month, and dropping a cool $40 (much less $60) on a game isn’t something I can just go out and do. This is where the principle of buying new starts to lose some ground. Games, and the consoles they run on, and the accessories you play with, are a whopping financial investment. My entertainment center has several hundred dollars sitting on it, TV included (contrary to popular belief, you will need a TV to play console games…or a nice monitor). Because of this, companies like GameStop prey on your desire to pay less than full price for video games. This would be a noble endeavor were it not so blatantly clear that GameStop is dollar-driven, not customer-driven. “Power to the Players?” Please. More like “Power to Our Bottom Line.” However, buying games new at somewhere other than GameStop does two things: It rewards the developers, and it screws GameStop out of a potential transaction.

I’ve started selling my old games at a local comic shop where I get store credit (of course) but I use that credit to buy expensive figures. Real money I used to blow on Kotobukiya’s Bishoujo Wonder Woman is now spent buying new games. They also give me more credit than GameStop does, although how could they not? They tell me exactly how much each thing will be worth in store credit so I can decide whether it’s worth giving to them or not. They know me there; they know I read Power Girl. The revolving door of GameStop employees don’t know me from the pale, obese, T-shirt wearing, acne-laden gamer stereotype in line behind me, and that’s a little disappointing.

“But I can get StreetPasses there!” I can hear you decree. I’ve gotten StreetPasses in comic shops, in outdoor markets, in Best Buy, in the mall generally, at Barnes & Nobel, and even in PetCo. Don’t worry too much about it—you have other options. Besides, if you don’t live in Japan and don’t go to E3 or PAX, those StreetPass games are barely worth trying for anyway. So the lesson to take away from this article? GameStop is not worth giving your time or money to when there are plenty of stores that will happily take your money and not waterboard you while doing so. There is just no good reason to go to GameStop in today’s day and age.


1172
TalkBack / Re: RFN 250: A Live Call-In Celebration TODAY!
« on: July 09, 2011, 04:10:45 PM »
I can't see the chat box...puke!

1173
Podcast Discussion / Episode 60: iPokémon
« on: July 08, 2011, 05:06:46 PM »

Pokémon is coming to the App Store? Sounds like somebody at Nintendo has a screw loose.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/newscast/27153

On this episode of the Newscast, Andy, Zach, and Mike chat about an impending Pokémon smartphone game, the loss of Super Meat Boy as a potential 3DS game, the long-awaited availability of Final Fantasy VI on Virtual Console, and the 2011 Club Nintendo Rewards.

Also, we talk about Zelda AGAIN. There's also some chatter about non-Nintendo games, but you probably don't care much about that.

Don't forget to email us at newscast@nintendoworldreport.com!


1174
Podcast Discussion / Re: Episode 59: Rainy Days
« on: July 03, 2011, 09:57:06 PM »
Well, that's what I do.

1175
Movies & TV / Re: Rate the last TV show you've seen
« on: July 03, 2011, 03:55:47 AM »
Still loving "How I Met Your Mother."

Still irritated by the script calling for commentary on Robin's bosom surprisingly often, because she doesn't HAVE one. Every time somebody brings it up ("Robin, stop puffing out your breasts!") my wife and I say, together, "WHAT BREASTS?" It's like the writers have never seen the woman who was cast in that role.

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