Post by: wandering on January 30, 2006, 12:38:16 AM
One person names a seemingly-innoucous object. The next person describes how you could use this object to kill an unrestrained person. Then they name a new object. Okay? Ready?
The object is: Nintendo DS.
*please note that participating in this game in any way may result in your phone getting tapped by the NSA. But that's part of the fun!
Post by: Pryopizm on January 30, 2006, 02:47:18 AM
Next object: cow tongue
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on January 30, 2006, 06:26:11 AM
new object: my left shoe
Post by: ShyGuy on January 30, 2006, 06:55:33 AM
Austin Powers: "That really hurt! I'm gonna have a lump there, you idiot! Who throws a shoe? Honestly! You fight like a woman!"
*Proceeds to beat to death with the shoe
new object: roll of toliet paper
Post by: ThePerm on January 30, 2006, 07:40:40 AM
object is a wavebird.
Post by: wandering on January 30, 2006, 04:04:40 PM
Then I'd jump out of the shadows, beat my victim over the head with the wavebird til he was knocked out, and then twist the wavebird til it split in 2. And then I'd shove the wavebird parts down my victims throat. isn't this fun?
next item: pocket lint.
Post by: Karl Castaneda #2 on January 30, 2006, 04:30:28 PM
Next Item: Gummi Bears
Post by: Pryopizm on January 30, 2006, 05:49:46 PM
Next item: a pretty kitty
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on January 30, 2006, 05:54:01 PM
next item: a bar of soap
Post by: animecyberrat on January 30, 2006, 06:31:28 PM
Ok next item a "rubber"
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on January 30, 2006, 06:43:59 PM
next item: styrofoam cup
Post by: ThePerm on January 30, 2006, 06:59:12 PM
Item: Ear Muffs
Post by: animecyberrat on January 30, 2006, 07:06:49 PM
next item
Cell Phone
Post by: IceCold on January 30, 2006, 08:04:32 PM
Next item.. Blade of Grass
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on January 30, 2006, 09:10:29 PM
next item: cellophane from a singe pack of cigarettes
Post by: ShyGuy on January 31, 2006, 06:56:16 AM
Next Item: Smith and Wesson .45 with a full clip
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on January 31, 2006, 07:04:55 AM
I take the gun and point it his head and pull the trigger
*miss-fire*
*miss-fire*
*miss-fire*
realize that the firing pin is gone.
so I eject the clip from the gun and pistol whip the victim until they are unconscious
I then make them swallow all the bullets from the clip, then I aim a microwave emitter at his stomach until it heats up the bullets enough to expolde.
next item: a drinking straw
Post by: ShyGuy on January 31, 2006, 07:29:49 AM
Let's come up with some really innocuous...
next item: soap bubble, floating in the air.
Post by: wandering on January 31, 2006, 08:18:32 AM
1: You manufacture a poisoned soap bubble. But ShyGuy implied that the soap bubble was found already floating, so that's no good.
2. You use the soap bubble as a distraction. For example, you might cup the soap bubble in your hand, beckon your victim to take a close look, and then hit him. Hard. Or you might blow it in a conveinent direction so that your victim turns his back to you, and then hit him. Hard.
....Now, you might argue that in scenario 2, your arms are doing the killing more than the soap bubble. But actually, as long as we don't have autonomous killing robots, objects don't kill so much as they increase your power to kill, which they can do to varying degrees. And since a soap bubble can do it to some degree, I think it counts.
What's that? I should stop being philosophical and start being funny? Sorry.
Okay, next item: desk fan.
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on January 31, 2006, 09:00:25 AM
next item: box of crackers
Post by: Arbok on January 31, 2006, 09:14:51 AM
next item: 2 inch strain of hair
Post by: stevey on January 31, 2006, 10:52:44 AM
Next item: the corpse I just killed.
Post by: Zach on January 31, 2006, 11:15:42 AM
next item: a spoon
Post by: KnowsNothing on January 31, 2006, 11:28:10 AM
Post by: Zach on January 31, 2006, 12:04:57 PM
Quote
Originally posted by: wandering
....Now, you might argue that in scenario 2, your arms are doing the killing more than the soap bubble. But actually, as long as we don't have autonomous killing robots, objects don't kill so much as they increase your power to kill, which they can do to varying degrees. And since a soap bubble can do it to some degree, I think it counts.
Thats from the guy who started this game, so dont complain about his rules
But if you insist:
Takes the corpse, cuts it open, and shoves KN's head in, KN drowns in the corpse (happy now?)
j/k
NEXT ITEM: A SPOON!
Post by: ShyGuy on January 31, 2006, 01:11:00 PM
"Because it hurts more!"
Procedes to disembowel victim with the spoon.
Next Item: Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess Gamecube Disc, gold release.
*-Now the challenge here is, if you can keep the TP game disc intact and unmarred, you can pop it into your gamecube to play after you kill the vic!
Post by: ThePerm on January 31, 2006, 02:52:21 PM
item- 1 single grain of sand
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on January 31, 2006, 05:45:51 PM
First I would pull out a shrink ray and shrink the victim soooo small that you need an electron microscope just to see them. Now my single grain of sand is like a gynormous boulder that is about to be dropped on the victims head. SPLAT!!
next item: the bible
anything less than mass suicide is blasphemy
Post by: Zach on January 31, 2006, 07:02:47 PM
DANGER: this method has a risk of insanity to the person reading the bible, make sure that you have a friend near by so that you can take shifts reading.
in the event that this doesnt work, try hiring ben stein (or your teacher who sounds the most like him) to do the job, in the EXTREMELY slim chance that this still does not work, try using the bible to beat the victim over the head (even though it may be funny, dont use a pocket bible).
Next item: a tube of chap-stick
Edit: Im going to hell
Post by: wandering on January 31, 2006, 11:14:18 PM
QuoteQuote
Originally posted by: wandering
....Now, you might argue that in scenario 2, your arms are doing the killing more than the soap bubble. But actually, as long as we don't have autonomous killing robots, objects don't kill so much as they increase your power to kill, which they can do to varying degrees. And since a soap bubble can do it to some degree, I think it counts.
Thats from the guy who started this game, so dont complain about his rules
But if you insist:
Actually, there is a difference...I didn't use any object other than a soap bubble, and you used an outside object (though earlier I did use a tv...) But that's okay, because there are no definate 'rules' - that would make the game less fun. You can choose the level of reality you want to deal with.
edit: actually, I changed my mind. A shrink ray? Now, that's just lazy.
edit2: and as for the Bible, I'd just use it to point out to people that they need to kill my victim, who happens to be an abortion doctor.
...Or maybe, while preparing to use the bible for such a nefarious deed, I'd read it, and learn that I should forgive and shouldn't kill, and then I'd change my ways and spend the rest of my life happily, religiously, ever after.
Post by: wandering on January 31, 2006, 11:30:11 PM
Next item: an empty pizza box.
Post by: ThePerm on February 01, 2006, 06:32:43 AM
item: one single sugar grain
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 01, 2006, 07:32:04 AM
Quote
Originally posted by: ThePerm
i would take the empty pizza box and eqip it with lots of poison tipped fangs, put a single slice of pizza in it... go onto a college campus and leave it in the quad. Every time someone reached for the pizza, the box would slam shut poisoning them.
item: one single sugar grain
fixed
Post by: ShyGuy on February 01, 2006, 02:26:04 PM
Next Item: a booger from Reggie's nose.
Post by: wandering on February 01, 2006, 07:17:21 PM
...complications might arise if it deemed me unworthy...
next item: a corkscrew.
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 01, 2006, 08:05:58 PM
next item: the cork
edit: is that better?
Post by: wandering on February 01, 2006, 08:21:41 PM
Next item: the bottle.
Post by: ShyGuy on February 01, 2006, 08:26:10 PM
Next Item: Ice bucket that the bottle was setting in.
Post by: ThePerm on February 01, 2006, 09:08:02 PM
next: a koala
Post by: wandering on February 01, 2006, 09:21:15 PM
Quote
Make you sit and then spin... no don't stop, keep spinning and spinning and spinning.
Quote
Bottle is easy, smash it into shards, then make the victim walk back and forth on the broken glass until he bleeds to death.
Making? How? Mysterious mind control powers?
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 01, 2006, 09:39:30 PM
Quote
Originally posted by: wanderingQuote
Make you sit and then spin... no don't stop, keep spinning and spinning and spinning.Quote
Bottle is easy, smash it into shards, then make the victim walk back and forth on the broken glass until he bleeds to death.
Making? How?
ok, editted my last post about the corkscrew.
Post by: wandering on February 01, 2006, 09:41:25 PM
My victim sees a cute and cuddly koala bear approaching him in a dark alley. He thinks all is well, until he sees the two human eyes that are glaring evilly out from holes punctured in the Koala's face. He starts to run. He feels the blood from the koala innards dripping on his head before he sees the two human hands holding koala intestine. He feels the slimy rope as it wraps around his neck. And the distinct sting of a koala claw being shoved into his groin. As the agonizing pain continues, his world slowly turns to darkness.
next item: mysterious mind control powers
Post by: wandering on February 01, 2006, 09:43:49 PM
Quote
what?
How are you making your victim do nasty things to himself?
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 01, 2006, 09:44:40 PM
Quote
Originally posted by: ThePerm
i let the ice freeze the water and the bucket..and then i smack someone t o death with t he blunt hard bucket
next: a koala
nuff said?
next item: the INTERNET!!!
Post by: ShyGuy on February 02, 2006, 05:18:42 AM
Quote
Making? How? Mysterious mind control powers?
Ok, I sprinkled the shards in a narrow hallway and at the end of the hallway, I placed a delicious pie. Once he reaches the pie, I place a delicious cake at the other end of the hallway.
Blah, I still think the soap bubble post was a cop out. Every post could then be: Distract victim with _object_, hit said victim.
Distract victim with the internet, then hit them really hard.
Next Item: yourself in a giant monkey ball.
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 02, 2006, 06:36:33 AM
And no its not a 'distract with object X and then hit with object Y or Z' post.
Post by: Pryopizm on February 02, 2006, 02:13:50 PM
Next item: SCIENCE FACTS
Post by: ThePerm on February 02, 2006, 04:53:35 PM
next item: froot loops
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 02, 2006, 05:32:05 PM
next item: teh internet
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 02, 2006, 05:42:21 PM
) out for a really greasy meal of fried chicken, and anything else bad for you. After the meal we would watch a really scary movie, just something to get his heart rate up a little more . then I would ask him if he has seen that new car commercial on tv(which he hasn't) then proceed to show it to him on the internet.*you should follow these instuctions too*
first I would turn up the volume on his speakers so that he could hear the dialogue
and tell him to sit close enough to the screen to get a good look at whats going on
then to click on this link
and if everything goes as planned, he'll have a heart attack and die
next item: a giant foam finger
Post by: IceCold on February 02, 2006, 08:25:52 PM
Post by: wandering on February 02, 2006, 08:26:15 PM
Okay, next item: a soap bubble (since my answer was such 'a cop-out', I challenge somebody to come up with a better one)
Post by: ShyGuy on February 03, 2006, 07:32:03 AM
Next Item: PS3 Controller
Post by: KDR_11k on February 03, 2006, 09:09:22 AM
Next up: Atari 2600 cartridge "E.T."
Post by: stevey on February 03, 2006, 10:58:03 AM
Next thing: a Mortal Kombat game.
Post by: IceCold on February 03, 2006, 06:09:00 PM
Next item: Swatch watch.
Post by: KDR_11k on February 03, 2006, 10:09:41 PM
Next up: A Kasumi hugging pillow. No, you're not allowed to crush their skull with the accompanying XBox, that's too easy.
Post by: wandering on February 04, 2006, 03:04:10 AM
next item: a trash can lid (yeah, I watched Battle Royale recently)
Post by: KDR_11k on February 04, 2006, 05:51:29 AM
Next item: Your wit that is sharper than any sword (remember that ad?).
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 04, 2006, 09:38:16 AM
Me - I can prove to you that you are stupider than tou think.
Him - I'm not stupid, so how are you gonna prove that?
Me - Wit
Him - Wit what?
Me - Uhh, ok..... If you can give me a reasonable explanation to this one questions then I will admit that you are smart, but you cannot leave this room for any reason until you have answered it.
Him - ..... ok
Me - Does expecting the unexpected make the unexpected the expected?
Now as he sits and ponders that question for about 10 days w/o food or water he would eventually die.
p.s. I would also like to see if someone could use wit better than I have, I think that is a challenging one.
next item: a post-it note
Post by: wandering on February 06, 2006, 06:58:58 AM
Quote
p.s. I would also like to see if someone could use wit better than I have, I think that is a challenging one.
Man in Black: All right. Where is the poison? The battle of wits has begun. It ends when you decide and we both drink, and find out who is right... and who is dead.
Vizzini: But it's so simple. All I have to do is divine from what I know of you: are you the sort of man who would put the poison into his own goblet or his enemy's? Now, a clever man would put the poison into his own goblet, because he would know that only a great fool would reach for what he was given. I am not a great fool, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. But you must have known I was not a great fool, you would have counted on it, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me.
Man in Black: You've made your decision then?
Vizzini: Not remotely. Because iocane comes from Australia, as everyone knows, and Australia is entirely peopled with criminals, and criminals are used to having people not trust them, as you are not trusted by me, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you.
Man in Black: Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.
Vizzini: Yes, Australia. And you must have suspected I would have known the powder's origin, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me.
Man in Black: You're just stalling now.
Vizzini: You'd like to think that, wouldn't you? You've beaten my giant, which means you're exceptionally strong, so you could've put the poison in your own goblet, trusting on your strength to save you, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. But, you've also bested my Spaniard, which means you must have studied, and in studying you must have learned that man is mortal, so you would have put the poison as far from yourself as possible, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me.
Man in Black: You're trying to trick me into giving away something. It won't work.
Vizzini: IT HAS WORKED! YOU'VE GIVEN EVERYTHING AWAY! I KNOW WHERE THE POISON IS!
Man in Black: Then make your choice.
Vizzini: I will, and I choose - What in the world can that be?
[Vizzini gestures up and away from the table. Roberts looks. Vizzini swaps the goblets]
Man in Black: What? Where? I don't see anything.
Vizzini: Well, I- I could have sworn I saw something. No matter.First, let's drink. Me from my glass, and you from yours.
[they drink ]
Man in Black: You guessed wrong.
Vizzini: You only think I guessed wrong! That's what's so funny! I switched glasses when your back was turned! Ha ha! You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly less well-known is this: never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha -
[Vizzini stops suddenly, and falls dead to the right]
Buttercup: And to think, all that time it was your cup that was poisoned.
Man in Black: They were both poisoned. I spent the last few years building up an immunity to iocane powder.
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 06, 2006, 09:00:04 AM
anyway, next item: post-it note
Post by: stevey on February 06, 2006, 10:31:48 AM
next
Post by: Rhoq on February 06, 2006, 11:12:06 AM
Quote
Originally posted by: BlackNMild2k1
plagiarist!!!!!
anyway, next item: post-it note
I can never get tired of The Princess Bride.
I know Stevey already gave his scenario for death by Post-It note, but I would just like to ask the question: Has anyone ever seen the (now cancelled) Showtime series Dead Like Me?
If you have, you'll know how a Post-It note can mean death.
Post by: IceCold on February 06, 2006, 02:15:44 PM
QuoteIt's true.. *nods head solemnly*
as everyone knows, and Australia is entirely peopled with criminals
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 06, 2006, 06:07:13 PM
Quote
Originally posted by: stevey
Think post-it note are cheese and eat till get paper cut and slit neck from inside out.
next
you forgot to pick the next item stevey...
Post by: wandering on February 07, 2006, 07:18:59 AM
Quote
Originally posted by: stevey
next
The NeXT operating system, eh? Well, I'd probably install in in my victim's artificial pacemaker, and wait for him to die via spinning beach ball of death.
next item: the revmote (nunchaku not included)
Post by: stevey on February 12, 2006, 11:15:50 AM
Next up bridget
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 12, 2006, 11:32:20 AM
), they really hit it off, get lots of drinks, and get really flirtatous. Just before he would end up going home w/ Bridget, already holding hands and making out a-lot, I would call his cellphone. He would tell me how he met the woman of his dreams and how she is really hot, he would even send me a cell phone pic, which I would immediatly put up on myspace with all the embarassing truth behind it.Now he would get home with Bridget and....
Things really start to heat up between the two, first they Hey this is very graphic and completely censored, so censored that I'm not even gonna post what really happens, You are gonna have to use your imagination and come up with your own details to fill this spoiler tagged part of the story. and thats when he realised that he just got it on with a man and already confessed his love for her(him) to his friends & now knows he had been set up.
But to make an already long story not much longer, we never found out what happened to him, he never showed his face again, we just assumed he died of shame.
next item: Animecyberrats rap music
Post by: ThePerm on February 12, 2006, 12:03:14 PM
next item: rubber gloves
Post by: ThePerm on February 24, 2006, 12:33:16 PM
next item. animal crossing wild world cartridge!!!
Post by: stevey on February 24, 2006, 01:23:08 PM
next: a web forum base on Nintendo Gamecube
Post by: BlackNMild2k1 on February 24, 2006, 05:40:07 PM
I would sign this person up and then set them up to be the first on killed in the game, and therefore in real life!!!!
Post by: wandering on February 24, 2006, 09:24:36 PM
Then I'd go and kill someone like how I described in the thread.
Then, in police questioning, they'd say, "there's no smoking in here."
Then, I'd say, "what are you going to do about it?"
Then, they'd do nothing and ask me about the murder.
Then, coldy, I'd say "I wouldn't kill someone in the exact way I described a killing in a web forum. That would be stupid. I'm not stupid."
Then I'd have a love affair with Michael Douglas.
I'm kidding.
