Author Topic: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)  (Read 8622 times)

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Offline pokepal148

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Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« on: November 17, 2021, 12:57:11 AM »

At Joja Mart, we pride ourselves in our wonderful selection of food for the whole family. These are just some of the wonderful items you can find on our shelves.



With such a wide selection of goods, who would wanna shop at Khushrenada's? Nobody! That's who!
« Last Edit: November 22, 2021, 09:21:35 PM by pokepal148 »

Offline Khushrenada

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business!
« Reply #1 on: November 18, 2021, 12:50:58 AM »
Oh wow!! Perfect! Finally someone is making taco sauce for babies! I was going to cook a couple kids up tonight so this'll work out great. It can be real hard to find proper seasoning for that type of meat.

I'm sorry I took this thread in such a dark direction but I'm also not sorry if it makes it hard for Joja Mart to overcome this scandal.
Whoever said, "Cheaters never win" must've never met Khushrenada.

Offline pokepal148

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business!
« Reply #2 on: November 18, 2021, 11:34:01 AM »
You're saying that as if I wasn't planning to go even darker.


Have you signed up for Joja Prime? With Joja Prime, you can get two day shipping to your home for free! Talk about huge savings! You also get access to our movie streaming service, ad free viewing on Mixer, our livestreaming platform, and a lifetime* supply of kittens** bred right here in Shady Village.

*canceling your Joja Prime subscription for any reason will result in you no longer having access to our lifetime supply of kittens. Customers are limited to one free kitten per year. Once the kitten reaches 12 months of age, a Joja Mart representative will arrive to send the kitten to a Joja Mart Kitten Mill and a replacement kitten will be provided at an undetermined date.

**Some kittens may appear to be green and have a lettuce like texture on their fur. This is normal. Please keep these kittens away from predatory insects that feed on crops. All kittens are the property of the Joja Corporation. By accepting these kittens you also accept liability for any harm that occurs to them.
« Last Edit: November 18, 2021, 11:44:14 AM by pokepal148 »

Offline Stratos

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business!
« Reply #3 on: November 18, 2021, 12:21:12 PM »
Take me to the emergency room sauce sounds like an amazing hot sauce name.
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Offline M.K.Ultra

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business!
« Reply #4 on: November 18, 2021, 03:00:37 PM »
What kind of Black Friday specials are you planning there at JoJa Mart?

Offline BeautifulShy

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business!
« Reply #5 on: November 18, 2021, 09:15:27 PM »
You're saying that as if I wasn't planning to go even darker.


Have you signed up for Joja Prime? With Joja Prime, you can get two day shipping to your home for free! Talk about huge savings! You also get access to our movie streaming service, ad free viewing on Mixer, our livestreaming platform, and a lifetime* supply of kittens** bred right here in Shady Village.

*canceling your Joja Prime subscription for any reason will result in you no longer having access to our lifetime supply of kittens. Customers are limited to one free kitten per year. Once the kitten reaches 12 months of age, a Joja Mart representative will arrive to send the kitten to a Joja Mart Kitten Mill and a replacement kitten will be provided at an undetermined date.

**Some kittens may appear to be green and have a lettuce like texture on their fur. This is normal. Please keep these kittens away from predatory insects that feed on crops. All kittens are the property of the Joja Corporation. By accepting these kittens you also accept liability for any harm that occurs to them.

Why does your logo look like the Watch Mojo logo? 
Maxi is dead. I killed him and took his posts and changed genders.
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Quote by Khushrenada in Safe Words 15.
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I'm happy with thinking pokepal148 is just eating a stick of butter. It seems about right for him. I don't need no stinking facts.

Offline pokepal148

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business!
« Reply #6 on: November 18, 2021, 11:27:18 PM »
What kind of Black Friday specials are you planning there at JoJa Mart?
We have all kinds of sales designed to get you into our store from televisions and movies from two years ago to common household goods. We also have all sorts of great deals on Joja.com as part of our Deals on Wheels promotions going on throughout the holidays. Make sure to check www.jojamart.com for all the latest deals.
« Last Edit: November 19, 2021, 11:49:07 AM by pokepal148 »

Offline pokepal148

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business!
« Reply #7 on: November 19, 2021, 01:09:00 PM »
At Joja Mart, we like to pretend that safety is our number 1 priority. All of our associates are wearing face masks but we don't want to lose any money so we won't be requiring our customers to do the same. We hope you appreciate this 100% hollow gesture that shows our absolute lack of commitment to your safety or the safety of your community.

Offline Khushrenada

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business! (The Dead Thread)
« Reply #8 on: November 19, 2021, 01:31:51 PM »
That gets a Honk!
Whoever said, "Cheaters never win" must've never met Khushrenada.

Offline Mop it up

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #9 on: November 19, 2021, 09:00:28 PM »
Ah well, at least I got more of you shlubs voting in the early days!

In case anyone didn't catch it, my scheme was to simply cast a vote for every player within the span of a single day, seemed like a funny thing to do. I wonder if anyone's ever done that before...

I s'pose at some point my plan will have to be to do that and still survive the day...

Offline pokepal148

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #10 on: November 19, 2021, 09:19:52 PM »
Any dead players who want to actually do some game talk should message me on discord.

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #11 on: November 21, 2021, 03:26:50 AM »
We at Joja Mart are deeply concerned about the sudden criminal element that has infested Mafia Town. It has come to our attention that there is an abandoned community center in the area that could potentially be used as a base of operations for a group of nasty people like the staff at Pierre's general store or the Mafia. That is why we propose that it be converted to a Joja Mart warehouse. We will happily ensure that the community center cannot be used by the mafia or this killer who has been running around as some kind of base of operations for their nefarious purposes. Instead it will be used by Joja Mart incorporated for our nefarious purposes in the name of capitalism.

Offline Mop it up

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #12 on: November 21, 2021, 12:46:40 PM »
Quote from: BeautifulShy
As for me siding with pokepal to be honest I was least upset with pokepal of the players in last games alliance.  It is Mop it up, MKBungle and then pokepal in that order. 
Now this doesn't make a lick of sense. Pokepal148 did far more damage than anyone else did!

Offline Khushrenada

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #13 on: November 21, 2021, 12:50:19 PM »
Mop it up: Mafia's Most Upsetting Player!

Just can't trust her like you can your good pal Khushreanda who's always honest and true!  ;D
Whoever said, "Cheaters never win" must've never met Khushrenada.

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #14 on: November 21, 2021, 12:55:00 PM »
Quote from: BeautifulShy
As for me siding with pokepal to be honest I was least upset with pokepal of the players in last games alliance.  It is Mop it up, MKBungle and then pokepal in that order. 
Now this doesn't make a lick of sense. Pokepal148 did far more damage than anyone else did!

I am just going to say that you dupped pokepal and is responsable for that. Bungle was just going along with you. Pokepal while inviting you two was a bad choice we as a collective alliance didn't do enough to get you and Bungle out soon enough.  Thus the vendetas this game. You more than Bungle at this point.
Maxi is dead. I killed him and took his posts and changed genders.
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Quote by Khushrenada in Safe Words 15.
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I'm happy with thinking pokepal148 is just eating a stick of butter. It seems about right for him. I don't need no stinking facts.

Offline Mop it up

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #15 on: November 21, 2021, 01:02:15 PM »
I barely said anything to Pokepal148, his decisions were mostly his own or influenced by other people like Order.RSS. I never told Mr.Bungle to do anything either, stuff he did was his own idea. You're manufacturing all of this in your own mind and looking for an easy scapegoat. :P

Pokepal while inviting you two was a bad choice we as a collective alliance didn't do enough to get you and Bungle out soon enough.
At least this line recognises that you and Pokepal148 are more responsible than I am. ;)

Mop it up: Mafia's Most Upsetting Player!

Just can't trust her like you can your good pal Khushreanda who's always honest and true!  ;D
Quiet you! You're just trying to get people to vote out someone else day one besides yourself!
« Last Edit: November 21, 2021, 01:09:32 PM by Mop it up »

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #16 on: November 21, 2021, 01:12:16 PM »
Mop it up: Mafia's Most Upsetting Player!

Just can't trust her like you can your good pal Khushreanda who's always honest and true!  ;D
Quiet you! You're just trying to get people to vote out someone else day one besides yourself!

The fact that you would accuse me of such a thing is highly upsetting.  8)
Whoever said, "Cheaters never win" must've never met Khushrenada.

Offline BeautifulShy

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #17 on: November 21, 2021, 01:20:48 PM »


Pokepal while inviting you two was a bad choice we as a collective alliance didn't do enough to get you and Bungle out soon enough.
At least this line recognises that you and Pokepal148 are more responsible than I am. ;)

It is that snarky attitude that got you voted out this game.
Maxi is dead. I killed him and took his posts and changed genders.
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Quote by Khushrenada in Safe Words 15.
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I'm happy with thinking pokepal148 is just eating a stick of butter. It seems about right for him. I don't need no stinking facts.

Offline Mop it up

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Re: Joja Mart is open for business! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #18 on: November 21, 2021, 01:28:08 PM »
Nah, you were gonna vote for me no matter what. And sometimes the truth is snark, I guess.

Mop it up: Mafia's Most Upsetting Player!

Just can't trust her like you can your good pal Khushreanda who's always honest and true!  ;D
Quiet you! You're just trying to get people to vote out someone else day one besides yourself!

The fact that you would accuse me of such a thing is highly upsetting.  8)

I s'pose I've earned this title!

Offline BeautifulShy

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Re: Joja Mart is closed forever! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #19 on: November 22, 2021, 07:17:19 AM »
It is a shame the Mafia didn't wait till today to kill me.  I had 3 letters in front of me if Stratos declined my letter. I guess with Bachlor 2 being Mafia then whoever had letter 3 was a townie  so the mafia killed me since they didn't have a choice in the matter. 
Maxi is dead. I killed him and took his posts and changed genders.
Alexis, she/her/Miss

Quote by Khushrenada in Safe Words 15.
Quote
I'm happy with thinking pokepal148 is just eating a stick of butter. It seems about right for him. I don't need no stinking facts.

Offline BeautifulShy

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Re: Joja Mart is closed forever! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #20 on: November 22, 2021, 07:17:39 AM »
With that said go townies!!!
Maxi is dead. I killed him and took his posts and changed genders.
Alexis, she/her/Miss

Quote by Khushrenada in Safe Words 15.
Quote
I'm happy with thinking pokepal148 is just eating a stick of butter. It seems about right for him. I don't need no stinking facts.

Offline BeautifulShy

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Re: Joja Mart is closed forever! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #21 on: November 22, 2021, 09:05:25 AM »
Funny thing about my role is that I was planning on role playing as Jamie before the game started but when my role came up as Jamie I decided to role play as Muffy and start a fruit infused bar and also have all sort of tasty dishes so a few options was Hibusicus flavored Banana Bread.  Honey Dew Melon flavored  drinks and other tasty snacks.   I would of had my animals being servents and the fish would of been the main attraction as I was going to use all my selections on them and maybe 1 other flower to have tasty dishes for everyone. 

Maybe it would have been funnier to be role playing as Jamie as the Jamie role and just flirting with everyone and then having folks question if I was the actual jamie role or just me being my IRL pansexual self and flirting with everyone.  That would have been fun.
Maxi is dead. I killed him and took his posts and changed genders.
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Quote by Khushrenada in Safe Words 15.
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I'm happy with thinking pokepal148 is just eating a stick of butter. It seems about right for him. I don't need no stinking facts.

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Re: Joja Mart is closed forever! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #22 on: November 22, 2021, 01:38:57 PM »
Does anyone want any of my flavored dishes? 

I have Honey Dew melon flavored Banana Bread, Honey Dew melon with Hyacinth flavored drinks.  Halibut served with honeydew melon braise and lily on the side as a visual piece.

The Hyacinth flavored drinks have zinc, copper and iron for your body and is wonderful for your health. Cooper is good for your brain health, cardivascaler, helps with your resperation and treats insomina!!

https://www.healthbenefitstimes.com/hyacinth-bean/

While the honey dew melon can help with reducing blood pressure, helps support healthy skin, and boosts you immune system!



Maxi is dead. I killed him and took his posts and changed genders.
Alexis, she/her/Miss

Quote by Khushrenada in Safe Words 15.
Quote
I'm happy with thinking pokepal148 is just eating a stick of butter. It seems about right for him. I don't need no stinking facts.

Offline Order.RSS

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Re: Joja Mart is closed forever! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #23 on: November 22, 2021, 06:39:28 PM »
I'd like to have the record show that Pokepal and I both got played like fiddles and each of us invited separate moles into that Townie Alliance lol. Although I think most of it was my fault, so I at least want partial credit for inadvertently dooming the previous Haunted Town Mansion!!  >:( ;) :vedetta:

That said, there's no way all the previous non-Townies would be non-Townies again, right? ....Right?

Hang on a minute...

Offline BeautifulShy

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Re: Joja Mart is closed forever! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #24 on: November 22, 2021, 06:53:23 PM »
I'd like to have the record show that Pokepal and I both got played like fiddles and each of us invited separate moles into that Townie Alliance lol. Although I think most of it was my fault, so I at least want partial credit for inadvertently dooming the previous Haunted Town Mansion!!  >:( ;) :vedetta:

That said, there's no way all the previous non-Townies would be non-Townies again, right? ....Right?

Hang on a minute...

To be fair I was stated to start on the townie side and I was playing like that till I was joined with Stratos who was a townie so the townie relationship would have continued.  Really the only thing I didn't say was my role directly.
Maxi is dead. I killed him and took his posts and changed genders.
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Quote by Khushrenada in Safe Words 15.
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I'm happy with thinking pokepal148 is just eating a stick of butter. It seems about right for him. I don't need no stinking facts.

Offline Mop it up

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Re: Joja Mart is closed for remodeling! (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #25 on: November 22, 2021, 07:52:54 PM »
I'd like to have the record show that Pokepal and I both got played like fiddles and each of us invited separate moles into that Townie Alliance lol. Although I think most of it was my fault, so I at least want partial credit for inadvertently dooming the previous Haunted Town Mansion!!
You didn't even make BeautifulShy's list, that's gotta sting! Poor Steefosaurus, never getting the credit he deserves.

Offline pokepal148

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #26 on: November 22, 2021, 09:22:17 PM »
Goods For Your Farm List

With the Jamie role matched (and dispatched) there is no longer any need to select items for your farms. I'm just posting the final edition of the list and where things were at for posterity/matter of public record. If you still want stuff for your farms then take what you want. Take whatever and all that you want. Mayor Khushrenada is too distraught to stop you now.




With that, the game is back on.
We understand how difficult it is for Mafia Town to get by now that the only store in town is gone but rest assured we are working hard to reopen our Mafia Town branch in order to best serve the needs of Mafia Town.

I'm Morris's identical twin brother, Borris by the way. I will be happy to serve my supervisors and the Joja Corporation sharehol- I mean the wonderful residents of Shady Valley!

Offline pokepal148

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #27 on: November 23, 2021, 03:33:05 PM »


Depicted: Khushrenada checking his voice-mail.

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #28 on: November 24, 2021, 01:43:24 PM »


Offline pokepal148

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #29 on: November 24, 2021, 07:32:43 PM »
I hear that Mafia Town has successfully taken out a Mafia member. We here at Joja Mart will be hosting an event at our warehouse to celebrate this success.

« Last Edit: November 24, 2021, 07:34:29 PM by pokepal148 »

Offline stevey

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #30 on: November 24, 2021, 10:27:45 PM »
(For the record, MKBungle was Bachelor #1. Stevey could have been bachelor #3 but he never sent in a letter.)

I waited to find a season appropriate cringy love song in order to give Jamie enough brain cancer to pick me. And I finally found it: Will You Be My Christmas Waifu
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Offline M.K.Ultra

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #31 on: November 24, 2021, 11:15:59 PM »

Well I guess I'm dead. I knew blabbering to the mayor was a bad idea. I suppose the sprite costume wasn't really fooling anyone. Honestly I thought hell would be worse, this JojoMart place ain't so bad. One of the perks of consumerism replacing religion I guess....Wait, all these movies are sequels...and all the albums are greatest hits compilations...and all this clothing is denim ... and are those ferrets! Dear god someone get me out of here :'(

Offline BeautifulShy

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #32 on: November 25, 2021, 07:30:49 AM »
(For the record, MKBungle was Bachelor #1. Stevey could have been bachelor #3 but he never sent in a letter.)


I waited to find a season appropriate cringy love song in order to give Jamie enough brain cancer to pick me. And I finally found it: Will You Be My Christmas Waifu

This would have been hilarious. I would of selected you right off the bat.  I am guessing whoever is GF didn't want to wait till the next day for me to make my choices on letters which by the results of things would have been Bungle and stevey. Detective and Goon.  The other thing is that this song would have been included in the letter and posted for all to see and I don't know many other anime and waifu obsessed players on here and it probably would have been easy to figure out it was you that sent me the letter/song and we would have been voted out but I guess on the bonus side if that happened me and you would have still won as mafia if Mafia won so there is that I guess.

There was probably too big of a risk with the detective still out there so I understand the logic there.

That said it would have been an interesting dynamic of Crimm being voted out but there being no retailiation for it in night actions and maybe folks turn on me since they may have thought that I was just trying to get townie cred by voting out a mafia member if I actually was a mafia member.

All interesting things to think about.
Maxi is dead. I killed him and took his posts and changed genders.
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Quote by Khushrenada in Safe Words 15.
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I'm happy with thinking pokepal148 is just eating a stick of butter. It seems about right for him. I don't need no stinking facts.

Offline BeautifulShy

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #33 on: November 25, 2021, 07:47:16 AM »
Any dead players who want to actually do some game talk should message me on discord.

Just a friendly reminder for those that are interested.
Maxi is dead. I killed him and took his posts and changed genders.
Alexis, she/her/Miss

Quote by Khushrenada in Safe Words 15.
Quote
I'm happy with thinking pokepal148 is just eating a stick of butter. It seems about right for him. I don't need no stinking facts.

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #34 on: November 26, 2021, 04:47:21 AM »
Hey, pokepal! Ya got any chicken livers? I'd like to suck the blood. Don't have any money to pay for it, but I could spare Mop it up and help mop the place. As long as I don't have to clean up any flea powder!

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #35 on: November 26, 2021, 04:49:43 AM »
The disadvantage of the vote reaching critical mass at night is there's no time for anyone to change their mind. Darn time zones!

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #36 on: November 26, 2021, 04:55:20 AM »
Kinda slow at Joja Mart today. Think I'll put a nickel in the jukebox. Hmmm. Here's a song from my favorite country singer: Donald Duck!

"Oh, bury me thar
with my battered git-tar
a-screamin' my heart out fer yew!"

Bein' dead ain't so bad MKBungle! Joja Mart's better than the Wal-Mart meat section.

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #37 on: November 27, 2021, 01:27:25 PM »
Joja Mart Ceo Bill Bezos is happy to contribute to the common human objective of space exploration instead of giving our money to trivial matters like "stopping Climate Change" or "ending world hunger." Not only does this ensure the future of the human race across the stars without doing anything for the ungrateful lot of moochers in the present but it also opens several business opportunities for us in the future.



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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #38 on: November 28, 2021, 01:10:11 PM »
By the way, I had meant to comment that it's been a long time since I've seen the vigilante actually strike down a Mafia member, I can't even remember when this last happened. Typically the vigilante is too timid to act, so kudos to you TOPHATANT123 for taking a stab and getting it right!

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Re: Joja Mart Grand Reopening (The Dead/RP Thread)
« Reply #39 on: November 28, 2021, 08:23:21 PM »
I was going to say this when I died but didn't want to be yelled at for giving out info:
Vendetta Tophatant123 :ph:

Also the reasons for my vote off were bollocks. Playing for the items was just fun and I would have killed BS day 1, Poke day 2, & Tophatant day 3 if I had my way :P
« Last Edit: November 28, 2021, 08:30:30 PM by stevey »
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nVidia is CRAP!!!
BOYCOTT Digest mode and LEGEND OF OO!

Your PM box will be spammed with Girl Link porn! NO EXCEPTION!
Wii want WaveBirds

Stevey Duff
NWR HAWTNESS Inspector
NWR Staff All Powerful Satin!