Author Topic: A Warriors Warrior Warriors for Warriors' Warriors.  (Read 1160 times)

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Offline Crimm

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A Warriors Warrior Warriors for Warriors' Warriors.
« on: June 09, 2023, 05:48:19 PM »

The most important article you'll read this week. For the next few weeks.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/feature/63911/a-warriors-warrior-warriors-for-warriors-warriors

It's June. We are days away from the one year anniversary of Nintendo's last Warriors game, Fire Emblem Warriors: Three Hopes.

Not to spoil the content of this literary masterwork, but it hinges on whether or not a person sleeping under a tree woke up during the first mission of Three Houses and ends with lizard people.

11 months since the last Nintendo Warriors game is 12 months too long for a Nintendo Warriors game. In fact, did you know if you were born in July, 2022 you have never seen a Nintendo Warriors game. You've lived your entire life without a Nintendo Warriors game of your own.

We have also waited for many franchises to receive their first Warriors entry. Far be it from me to deny you another chance to play as a half-dozen Links or the latest Intelligent Systems-designed mommy-dom spicy fanart bait, but it is beyond time to expand the horizons of Warriors Representation.

Nintendo has many franchises suited for the wide-scale enemy thwacking Warriors series, such as:

  • Super Mario.
  • Mario Kart.
  • Dr. Mario.
  • Mario & Luigi.
  • Mario Party.
  • Mario vs. Donkey Kong.
  • Mario Sports.
  • Mario and Sonic at the Olympics Games
  • Paper Mario.
  • Wave Race.

It isn't just that fans of beloved franchises are going underserved, it's that I'm going underserved. I have a trembling need to press a single button thirty times in a row. Exposing more fanbases to the Warriors format will allow the concept to spread. Age of Calamity was the best selling Warriors spin-off to date, and the fruit being left to over-ripen by returning to Zelda/Fire Emblem is potentially sacrificing wins tied to other Switch success stories.

It's also just uncreative. Nintendo and Koei Tecmo have limited themselves to Nintendo's war-centric franchises. It's an absolute miss. Military violence need not be the only thing in play when we also have comedic and cartoon violence that we can dish out on a mechanical scale.

You know what, I'll prove it.

Over the next few weeks, starting this Sunday, I'll help paint a picture. Take to social media and reply to every Nintendo of America tweet they should resist "Tears of the Warriors" and instead start on a new path.

Start with this one!

We, the voice of a generation, will demand Looksley's Line Up Warriors.

James Jones
Mondo Editor
Nintendo World Report

Offline pdoksus

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Re: A Warriors Warrior Warriors for Warriors' Warriors.
« Reply #1 on: June 10, 2023, 01:34:15 PM »
After the award winning articles of 'I Saw Three Images and I'm Enraged', 'Is The Pokémon Company Lying To You?', and 'Putting a Stop to Dr. Mario World's Degree Mills', this one is a letdown. No mention of Punch Out Warriors shows a lack of investigative rigor. It is an open secret that Nintendo has a program to create thousands of Glass Joe clones. Also Mario was seen wearing a referee's outfit. Tie the string between the two pins.

Offline Crimm

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Re: A Warriors Warrior Warriors for Warriors' Warriors.
« Reply #2 on: June 10, 2023, 10:26:51 PM »
Did you miss the "Part 1 drops on Sunday?"

This isn't the article - this is the introduction.
James Jones
Mondo Editor
Nintendo World Report

Offline pdoksus

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Re: A Warriors Warrior Warriors for Warriors' Warriors.
« Reply #3 on: June 16, 2023, 02:54:15 PM »
sorry about that. I meant it as a humorous post but it failed completely.

Offline Crimm

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Re: A Warriors Warrior Warriors for Warriors' Warriors.
« Reply #4 on: June 16, 2023, 11:18:17 PM »
hah it's all good
James Jones
Mondo Editor
Nintendo World Report

Offline TOPHATANT123

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Re: A Warriors Warrior Warriors for Warriors' Warriors.
« Reply #5 on: June 20, 2023, 02:51:17 PM »
This may well be the first trillion dollar idea

Offline lolmonade

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Re: A Warriors Warrior Warriors for Warriors' Warriors.
« Reply #6 on: June 26, 2023, 04:15:08 PM »
You can't make F-Zero fans angry if they're already defeated.