Messages

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TalkBack / Re: Nicalis Announces Four Switch Games

« on: June 12, 2017, 11:24:43 PM »

Which one has busty fighting? I know it's not Ittle Dew 2, because she's totally flat. Still a great game though

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TalkBack / Re: Hot Dogs Unable To Catch Up In Splatfest

« on: August 09, 2015, 05:16:54 PM »

I think the phrase "it's like comparing apples to oranges" could be replaced by "it's like comparing hot dogs to marshmallows." What a weird ketchup.

Are you seriously suggesting putting ketchup on a hot dog? What were you thinking?!

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TalkBack / Re: Nintendo Announces TVii is Coming to an End this August in North America

« on: July 26, 2015, 10:45:06 AM »

I was really excited for it at first. It appeared that there would be movies all the time and people could watch it together and comment together like some kind of Nico Douga. But then I tried it and I picked a movie and it was just a black screen. And no one else was watching. I still have no idea what the hell TVii is and don't really watch movies or TV outside of a very, VERY narrow range anyhow.

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TalkBack / Re: Nintendo And Canada: A Match Made In Heaven

« on: July 03, 2015, 08:22:24 AM »

As a trans-Canadian American, I feel Nintendo's games share a great deal of the same cultural values as my people.

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TalkBack / Re: Major Maintenance For Wii U and 3DS Online Coming Soon

« on: June 20, 2015, 03:06:14 PM »

The new system update will turn us all into amiibos and we will have to place the sensor in our wrist onto the reader. We will all undergo forced implanting as our skin is ripped off and our bones replaced by wires and our fluids drained and hundreds of squid allowed to crawl into our bodies and spread their tentacles across our veins and we squirt fluid all over the operating table and twitch and shake and moan and the doctor will yell "we are losing the patient!" as our face explodes squid internals all over the operating room and our remains scooped into an ice tray and frozen and used to cool the drinks of tentacle-headed monsters that sit behind great desks and push buttons that seal our fates

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TalkBack / Re: NWR TV - Kim, Becky and E3!

« on: June 14, 2015, 10:02:23 AM »

I do not like the Kim and Becky logo. It looks like two identical women's faces inserted onto the middle of a 1920's volleyball. Do they really have afro hairstyles in real life? And their faces make them look like caricatures of happy homemakers, not that there's anything wrong with that. So basically, when I see the logo, I think about two twins with their heads stuck inside old-timey volleyballs who want to clean my kitchen.

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TalkBack / Re: My Joyless Amiibo Journey

« on: April 04, 2015, 10:46:04 PM »

I purchased seven Rosalina Amiibo on opening day. Target management allowed me to do this with no problem, but when I went to the bathroom afterward I met up with one of the people who wasn't able to get them. He grabbed me by the face, his hand so huge he could grip my head like a basketball. The man dunked me repeatedly in the toilet while his son watched. I tried to fight back but he swung me by the ankles and flung me into the wall directly above the trash can, and I fell and landed inside. He then pushed the trash can under the automatic hand dryer and pushed the button in and then tore it off the panel, making it blow hot air on me continuously. For three hours I lay there in the trash can, the hot air drying out my mucus membranes, my face disfigured and my bones broken. He dumped all seven Rosalina Amiibo figures on top of me in the trash can, which he told me belonged to me and that I'd better enjoy them. I can't wait to try to collect the Splatoon ones next!

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TalkBack / Re: Fan Voting Opens For Smash Bros Characters

« on: April 01, 2015, 09:58:13 PM »

I voted for Daisy. It would be the only way they could get me to buy and play this game

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TalkBack / Re: Boxboy Coming to America Tomorrow

« on: April 01, 2015, 09:56:20 PM »

I think a word is missing from a sentence: "a cute little box who can boxes in his image". Or did I read that wrong?

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TalkBack / Re: Zombie Incident (3DS) Review

« on: March 25, 2015, 10:09:57 AM »

I bought this game and I'm not sure I want to put myself through the frustration of playing it to completion. I had a lot of critiques of the game, but then I read that it's just a port of an old MSX game, so I stopped worrying so much, knowing the developer should be judged more on the accurate translation to the 3DS.

The game could be saved if there were simply health drops from enemies--just that one thing would have fixed it. But instead, you have to minimize your mistakes to an obsessive degree, which is hard when lots of enemies fly in irregular patterns near the ceiling, requiring pixel-perfect practice to jump on their heads without taking damage.

And while your character is beautiful and well drawn on the title screen, her sprite is squished to fit in a 1x1 block, making her look more like an overweight office worker. I think the only thing I really enjoyed is the amusing game over sequence where your heroine becomes a zombie, loses her jumping ability, and becomes doomed to walk the dungeon forever. This actually got me a little horny, to be honest, overweight office worker appearance or no. I focus my mind more on the girl from the title screen when it happens.

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TalkBack / Re: Nintendo NX Console, Mobile Partnership, and Membership Service News Reaction and Discussion

« on: March 18, 2015, 10:04:24 PM »

I want what the Wii was rumored to be--an amorphous blob of a console that you pick up and it molds itself around your hands and squeezes them back as you flex and twist your muscles and bond with it on an organic level. It will have body morphing capabilities and will understand your every thought and dream and will add its flesh and genetic material to yourself through the pores in your skin and will run 24 hours a day within your subconscious, allowing you to level up while you are at work or school.

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TalkBack / Re: Gunman Clive 2 (3DS) Review

« on: January 31, 2015, 10:09:18 AM »

This game has been frustrating so far. I have really fond memories of the first and I think they ramped up the difficulty right from the get go. You go through long segments of moderate difficulty just to get to one tough part right before the level ends where you die and die, and it's very time consuming and rage-inducing to be continually sent back to before the long, boring part. Add to that a lot of obstacles where you will not know what to do the first time through and will have to die to learn what not to do, and you have yourself a maddening time-waster. I find myself ragequitting regularly and then resuming the level later, only to beat it and find a new obstacle and do the same thing again and again.

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TalkBack / Re: Electronic Super Joy: Groove City Review

« on: January 25, 2015, 09:57:34 AM »

What was that stuff about butts and penises? This is on Wii U??

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TalkBack / Re: Nintendo Responds to New 3DS Release Questions

« on: January 14, 2015, 04:31:00 PM »

They probably looked at the number of active systems on Club Nintendo and found that perhaps 75% of them were XLs, and also were afraid of crowding the market with too many confusing choices.

I think the backlash against the small screen size of the original 3DS also sticks in their craw a bit--I think American eyes love big screens and only the hardened few that grew up with portable gaming systems were prepared to accept the small dimensions of the regular 3DS. I showed normal friends the original 3DS and heard them to say "...not on a screen of that size." I think around then the tablet boom was just getting underway.

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TalkBack / Re: Mario Maker Will Support Online Level Sharing

« on: December 22, 2014, 05:52:19 PM »

Well, there goes my life. Gonna be playing this game endlessly now

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TalkBack / Re: NFC Payments Coming to New 3DS in Japan

« on: December 07, 2014, 09:44:42 AM »

What's to stop someone on the train from rubbing their New 3DS up against my butt where my wallet is and stealing my money? They could even do it surreptitiously by keeping their system in their front pocket and rubbing up against me from behind, thrusting their pelvis into my hindquarters and draining my card. When I visited Tokyo, I can't tell you how often I saw this behavior and on my next trip there I will be looking into lining my wallet with lead plating in the vain hope of stopping such rear-mounting shenanigans.

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TalkBack / Re: New Track Announced for Mario Kart 8

« on: October 22, 2014, 08:34:45 PM »

Yoshi Circuit is a dump. Its only memorable feature are the shortcut jumps and the long stretch before the finish line which is utterly *infested* with blue shells

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TalkBack / Re: How We Think Smash Bros. 3DS Should Be Updated

« on: October 22, 2014, 08:31:44 PM »

I am probably going to give up Smash, finding it a slightly boring and simplistic. I will stay only if Princess Daisy is made a proper character

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TalkBack / Re: Nintendo Download - October 16

« on: October 16, 2014, 08:33:35 PM »

The Legend of the Dark Witch is AMAZING! It's pretty much an 8-bit Mega Man game with a power up system stolen from Gradius. Great music, Japanese voice acting, cute character designs, fun dialog, and it can get hard as balls. And it's only $4! I love it

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TalkBack / Re: Voice Acting Language Selected for Mighty No. 9

« on: October 15, 2014, 11:00:30 AM »

Considering the high level of Japanese voice acting, which is even able to compete the likes of Disney and Hollywood on a fraction of the budget...probably not the best choice

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TalkBack / Re: Nintendo 3DS System Update Available, Adds New Parental Controls Feature

« on: May 14, 2014, 08:46:29 PM »

Yeah, Kitt, you're right, you still get the home with a cross through it when it's loading. I took the word of someone on Gamefaqs about that and it ended up not being true.

But I think the eShop does look a little different on the touchscreen when you put the cursor over a game icon. Not even sure if that change pertains to the system update or not.

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TalkBack / Re: Nintendo 3DS System Update Available, Adds New Parental Controls Feature

« on: May 14, 2014, 10:06:10 AM »

I believe the eShop has been modified as well. The menus look slightly different, and you can exit to the home menu when it's loading (no more house symbol with a cross through it when you attempt to hit Home)

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TalkBack / Re: Your Pro Guide to Rusty's Real Deal Baseball

« on: April 03, 2014, 09:03:38 PM »

How low can the price of a game go? I've been unable to get him to go less than $1.90

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TalkBack / Re: Mario Kart 11's Use of the GamePad Is Disappointing

« on: April 03, 2014, 10:45:55 AM »

Yes, that does seem like a good idea to have one player have the TV and the other to have the remote. That will probably ruin some fun that I could have had, and I wouldn't have minded a graphical drop in order to have that fun. Was their pride too much to allow this?

And also, Soren, I had not heard of Affordable Space Adventures. I found a trailer and look forward to it. I assume that it is a long ways off from release, though, since there isn't even an entry for it at Gamefaqs.

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TalkBack / Re: Wii U System Update 4.1.0 Downloadable Now

« on: April 01, 2014, 03:22:09 PM »

By quite small, do you mean a short download time? If it's 500 MB or more, I'll probably want to take it to a public wifi to update so as to not threaten my ISP's monthly download limit.