Author Topic: zelda timeline~ever notice  (Read 17273 times)

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Offline King of Twitch

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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #25 on: January 20, 2017, 06:28:19 PM »
My apologies to the fellow forumites and moderators of this fine forum. I didn’t realize my words, though brief, could be so hazy and it is the defining nature of my education to be as informative and inopaque as possible whenever the situation of public communication arises. Ever since my youth I was told in no uncertain terms that the best way to convey is to never make hay, a phrase that I will no doubt pass on to the next generation as soon as reproductive opportunities arise, so to speak. Thinking back to all the great literary heroes, orators, entertainers, and playwrights, one gets a sense that they are speaking through the centuries through a crystal clear pane of stained glass, not unlike those adorning the walls of the Temple of Time, unblemished by foolish asides and rabbit trails leading to grassy plains encircled by nowhere in particular; these heroes are the ones we are always trying to climb onto, first by awkwardly fumbling onto their backs with wretched poetry, then, finally, confidently lifting a foot onto their shoulder, where we can stand tall to feed the new generation with new, more relevant messages totally clear of obstructive prose. I have yet to encounter a message more pressing than the one contained in the Legend of Zelda, whose overtones of good and evil have unceremoniously been totally upended recently, an upheaval not considered by the enlightened circus tent that stretches its tarps across the review writers, forum dwellers, and bloggers of the internet.


In the year 1987, we all know that the series was first presented, by Nintendo, to an American public eager for new stories of cave dwellers becoming armed to launch a new series of holy wars via hijacked transportation (whether it be a raft, horse, or boat); a fact less observed, however, is the evil hidden not only in the series antagonist, Gannon Dorf, son of Morf, but in the way the series itself has unfolded. It doesn’t take a mathametic, mathmatetich, sorry, autocorrect is messed up hold on. 1. Aa Ok, I think I’ve got it fixed now. Mathematician to realize that the distance between games and historical events is at least as important as what’s in them. My attempt at subterfuge in order to spur other like-minded individuals to sift through otherwise unrelated points went unnoticed:


Quote
majora's mask is father away from us than super mario bros. was to majora's mask


sailed over the heads like the King of Red Lions swept across the blue ocean, a double-reference, unnoticed, that I hope to rectify both now and momentarily. The most bizarre thing that can be said of the Legend of Zelda is that its story is not only a perfect parallel to, but its release marks exactly 14 years before the event of, 9/11, the latter a dark day in history, but the former number also a dark and foreboding one for certain abhorrent groups which I will not dignify here, not that I fear them, only that I wish to avoid being drawn into a debate I care not to have now. My second attempt at subterfuge, that


Quote
Wind Waker was worse than 9/11


was my attempt to further lead the readers onto this path of seeing the series through the lens of history. Wind Waker was worse for the company than that terrorist attack, but worse things have happened; any keen student of history will be chilled they realize that Wind Waker (whose initials are flipped over from those of Majora’s Mask) and 9/11 can be shortened to W W I I, one of the worst wars in human history according to Wikipedia’s entry for List of wars by death toll. It was a war fought not for glory or for power, but simply for evil’s sake, just like Planet Gamecube; if you don’t believe me, just flip over the website’s founding year and tell me what number jumps out at you.

The quest for pure power in the form of the triforce has been at the forefront of the series since the beginning. Going off purely my memory and also pasting directly from https://zeldawiki.org/Triforce#The_Legend_of_Zelda, we are reminded that in the very first game the Triforce of Wisdom and Triforce of Power are described as "golden triangles possessing mystical powers" that grant their holders great power.[107] Prior to the events of the game, Ganon attacked the kingdom of Hyrule and stole the Triforce of Power. These ideas were percolating beneath my next observation:


Quote
ever notice there were two world wars, 30 years apart, basically the same teams, and they both lasted exactly 4 years? Isn't that kind of fishy?


30 years between world wars, 30 years since the first Zelda, anything sounding fishy yet? The triforce has been a part of the series off and on for three decades with basically the same teams, but now this singular element of power has been thrust into the forefront in The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild by a company that is no longer willing to hide its true intentions; what once was pure evil is now hidden in a hero that is supposed to be the embodiment of good.



In conclusion, it appears you all have been trolled.
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Offline Stratos

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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #26 on: January 21, 2017, 10:50:05 AM »
Still a better example of quality game journalism than most of the dreck produced in the modern gaming media.
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Offline Phil

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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #27 on: January 21, 2017, 07:26:21 PM »
I like this topic. Not just good but obviously had some effort put into it.
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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #28 on: January 21, 2017, 10:50:40 PM »
I think I'm going to give Mr. Shalong one more chance

Well, after considering it, I think I'm going to give the Ding-dong 10 more chances to really redeem this thread. But that's it.


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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #29 on: January 21, 2017, 11:03:24 PM »
*slaps chess pieces off the desk in a fit of rage* if that wasn't good enough than nothing will!
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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #30 on: January 21, 2017, 11:20:13 PM »
That was always going to be my response no matter what you posted.


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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #31 on: January 22, 2017, 03:58:15 PM »
 :evil; darn you
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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #32 on: August 30, 2017, 08:08:48 PM »
ever wonder if augmented reality is the true reality?
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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #33 on: October 19, 2017, 01:29:49 PM »
why can't we drop loot crates on Puerto Rico?
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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #34 on: October 19, 2017, 01:57:24 PM »
Are you trying to create a Hunger Games scenario of some kind out of Puerto Rico?


Speaking of PR, is anyone on these forums in contact with Soren in some way outside of them? I've been kind of worried about how's he doing ever since the hurricane hit and I've noted he's been absent from here since then.

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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #35 on: October 19, 2017, 06:30:53 PM »
The site's been in contact with him, he's doing okay.
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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #36 on: October 19, 2017, 06:40:57 PM »
Ah, cool. Good to hear.

Offline Stratos

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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #37 on: October 26, 2017, 11:12:18 PM »
The site's been in contact with him, he's doing okay.


What about Pap64? Or is he not on staff anymore?


Also Toruresu is in PR. Really hoping everyone is okay. Its rough down there. My team has been involved in sending people down there to help and it is just crazy.
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Offline King of Twitch

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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #38 on: April 23, 2018, 10:39:58 PM »
all the levels in fortnight are in daytime
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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #39 on: May 18, 2018, 10:51:33 PM »
Why isn't there a Guy Fieri of game development?


*samples some lines of C++*

"Mmm! That's out of the park!"
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Offline BranDonk Kong

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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #40 on: May 18, 2018, 11:12:05 PM »
Wat
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Offline ThePerm

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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #41 on: May 19, 2018, 06:08:51 AM »
Why isn't there a Guy Fieri of game development?


*samples some lines of C++*

"Mmm! That's out of the park!"

i'd watch that show
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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #42 on: May 21, 2018, 02:51:12 PM »
Why isn't there a Guy Fieri of game development?


*samples some lines of C++*

"Mmm! That's out of the park!"

i'd watch that show

yess! I would too. I nominate @BlackNMild to make the youtube series (later to be sold to Netflix).
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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #43 on: May 22, 2018, 04:04:49 AM »
Why isn't there a Guy Fieri of game development?


*samples some lines of C++*

"Mmm! That's out of the park!"

"I was worried that the gameplay mechanics were going to be a bit janky but then you added these awesome bits of code and took it to PHYSICS-TOWN!!!

So good!"
« Last Edit: May 22, 2018, 04:07:22 AM by Linkle Link »

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Re: zelda timeline~ever notice
« Reply #44 on: July 05, 2020, 03:14:20 AM »
does the Mushroom Kingdom have a Department of Transportation?

the reason I ask is because it doesn't seem like Jolly Roger Bay ever needed a ship in the first place.

point A: a ledge next to a wall

point B: a cave where stalagmites fall over for no reason

then they built a bridge out of blocks to the ship which temporarily activates after you step on a switch; why not just finish the nearly completed bridge with non-magical material? and then they built a canon to launch to the ship (in case you're in a REALLY big hurry?) so you don't even need the bridge, just really good aim. I bet they sunk that ship out of sheer incompetence.
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