Author Topic: Gamer Law>Man Law  (Read 7528 times)

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Offline WuTangTurtle

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Gamer Law>Man Law
« on: December 19, 2006, 03:10:58 PM »
(Warning - Health and Safety:  Before playing, read the Gamer Law precautions booklet for important information about your health and safety.  Do not take laws into you own hands, please contact someone who cares.)

Gamer Law

I.  Continue Crooks - NO stealing continues unless given the okay, its not are fault u suck.  (WuTangTurtle)

II. TV J Walkers - Sufficient warning is always required before walking in between a gamer and the TV. NO EXCEPTIONS, that burning building can wait five seconds.  (Zach)

III.  Game Posers – Cheating to beat a game and then bragging that you beat it all by yourself is illegal and punished by the removal of one (1) finger, other than the thumb.  (Mr. Jack)

IV.  The O.C. – Online Cheaters (Counter-Strike) are punishable by death.  (Mr. Jack)

V.  Mario Bros. before Ho’s – Never let a girl come between you and video games; bitches come and go, but Mario is for life.  (vudu/matt oz)

VI.  Spoiler Alert! – Never assume a fellow gamer has reached the same point in the game you’re playing, EVER.  If you talk about a game avoid spoilers at all cost, especially for Zelda dammit).  (EasyCure)

VII.  Buzz Kill – Don’t pause a game without warning.  I don’t care if you don’t know the moves in a fighting game, DEAL.  It ruins the GOOD gamers flow when you have to pause and look at a skill/move list.  (EasyCure)
Clause - You must confirm that all players are ready to resume playing.  (18 Days)

VIII.  Controller Etiquette – Wash your hands between snack breaks if you’re using someone else’s controllers.  (EasyCure)

IX.  File Imposing – Never play someone else’s file and save your progress.  (EasyCure)

X.  Walkthrough Wussies – Don’t use a Walkthrough, power level in a RPG, or play on anything but hard mode and call a game easy—it makes people want to smack you.  (vudu)

XI.  Co-op not Counter-op – Example:  When playing Contra with two players co-ordinate your jumps during vertical platforming segments.  Continue Crooks get a waiver if they have been Counter-opted.  (Ian Sane)

XII.  Follow Through – If a friend talks you into buying a co-op game, they have to play it with you until it is beaten or you are sick of it.  Example: FF: Crystal Chronicles.  (ShyGuy)

XIII.  New Challenger - No whining that you don't want a challenger in Soul Calibur in the arcade when you're doing TEH CONQUEST mode! Go home and play Final Fantasy instead. :\  (S-U-P-E-R)

XIV.  No Means No! - When told u are not allowed to play without the Wii Strap on, u better obey or you will learn the hard way.  (WuTangTurtle)

XV.  Gamer Prejudice -  Don't bitch about a game you have never played, or seen outside of screenshots.  (nitsu niflheim)

XVI.  No Babysitting - (movies & books too)  If you ask to borrow it I expect you to use/watch/read/play it, If I wanted it to sit somewhere and collect dust, it could've stayed on/in the shelf/box that I had it on/in. Oh and don't let someone else borrow my stuff, I loaned it to you, not to them.  (BlackNMild2k1)

XVII.  You Break, You Buy - You shouldn't mishandle people's stuff, I mean how would you like it if your girlfriend mishandeld your B@lls?  You Break, You Buy. Period.  (BlackNMild2k1)
Clause - Payment should be original MSRP, or decided on in a peaceful manner.  (TVman)

XVIII.  Accept Inferiority -  No bitching or blaming glitches in a game when you lose to someone else. Accept your inferiority.  (Mr. Jack)

XIX.  Have Fun - Don't take things too seriously, MMORPG mass suicides are not cool.  Same thing applies to literally punching someone in Wii Boxing, although it may be fun...(WuTangTurtle)

XX.  Pack it in - When telling a friend you are bringing a console/handheld be sure to bring everything you need such as a AV cable or power supply.  Remember its not as fun imagining playing a video game....(WuTangTurtle)

XXI.  The Giver - Do not let anyone borrow a game unless, A) They are a friend, B) You get something to borrow of equal value, or C) They are in Nut Kicking distance on a daily or weekly basis.  If none apply you just gave somebody a free game, don't b!tch you were warned.  (Vudu)

Offline UncleBob

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #1 on: December 19, 2006, 04:17:54 PM »
Man laws eh?  Never heard of 'em.
Just some random guy on the internet who has a different opinion of games than you.

Offline BlackNMild2k1

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #2 on: December 19, 2006, 05:26:23 PM »
This sounds like Funhouse material. carry on.

edit: for Uncle Bob

Man Laws

Offline Zach

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #3 on: December 19, 2006, 06:38:30 PM »
Quote

Originally posted by: WuTangTurtle
I.  Continue Crook - NO stealing continues unless given the okay.  (Contra)
(above rule Also applies for team stock in SSBM)

II. Sufficient warning is always required before walking in between a gamer and the TV.  NO EXCEPTIONS, that burning building can wait five seconds.

GAMER LAW  
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Offline WuTangTurtle

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #4 on: December 19, 2006, 07:02:57 PM »
lol, i didn't realize till now that the Funhouse is now called Grll gamers.  I'll post it in there instead.

Edit:  Disregard my message if the mods have moved this...

Offline BlackNMild2k1

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #5 on: December 19, 2006, 07:11:01 PM »
Don't re-post it, it will get moved sometime tomorrow, I'm sure some mod will be right on it...

*checks watch*



*checks watch again*

yep, definately sometime tomorrow

Offline Nick DiMola

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #6 on: December 20, 2006, 01:39:24 AM »
Cheating to beat a game and then bragging that you beat it all by yourself is illegal and punished by the removal of one (1) finger other than the thumb.

Cheating in Counter-Strike is punishable by death. (That'll teach those a$$holes)
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Offline vudu

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #7 on: December 20, 2006, 06:50:41 AM »
Never let a girl come between you and video games; bitches come and go, but Mario is for life.
Why must all things be so bright? Why can things not appear only in hues of brown! I am so serious about this! Dull colors are the future! The next generation! I will never accept a world with such bright colors! It is far too childish! I will rage against your cheery palette with my last breath!

Offline matt oz

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #8 on: December 20, 2006, 08:29:57 AM »
Quote

Originally posted by: vudu
Never let a girl come between you and video games; bitches come and go, but Mario is for life.



mario bros before hos!
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Offline EasyCure

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #9 on: December 20, 2006, 08:54:22 AM »
- never assume a fellow gamer has reached the same point in the game you're playing, EVER. if you talk about a game avoid spoilers at all cost (especially for zelda dammit)

- don't pause a game without warning. i dont care if you dont know the moves in a fighting game, DEAL. it ruins the GOOD gamers flow when you have to pause and look at a skill/move list.

- wash your hands between snack breaks if you're using someone elses controllers.

- NEVER play someone elses file and save your progress.  
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Offline vudu

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #10 on: December 20, 2006, 09:18:12 AM »
Don't use a walkthrough and then complain that the game is too easy--it makes people want to smack you.

On a similar note, don't power level in an RPG and then complain that the game is too easy--it also makes people want to smack you.
Why must all things be so bright? Why can things not appear only in hues of brown! I am so serious about this! Dull colors are the future! The next generation! I will never accept a world with such bright colors! It is far too childish! I will rage against your cheery palette with my last breath!

Offline Ian Sane

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #11 on: December 20, 2006, 09:44:21 AM »
When playing any Contra game with two players co-ordinate your jumps during vertical platforming segments.

When someone is playing a game don't just barge into the room they're in to ask or tell them something for they may be watching an unpauseable cut scene with information crucial to figuring out a later puzzle.  Though this is more of a rule for non-gamers living with a gamer, such as moms, girlfriends, moms, annoying little brothers, and moms.

Offline ShyGuy

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #12 on: December 20, 2006, 10:08:48 AM »
Ian has three mothers.

Gamer Law: If a friend talks you into buying a co-op game, they have to play it with you until it is beaten or you are sick of it.

Offline WuTangTurtle

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #13 on: December 20, 2006, 10:39:18 AM »
Damn u guys are quick.  Personally i like the "Mario Bros before hos!"

Offline BlackNMild2k1

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #14 on: December 20, 2006, 10:50:55 AM »
Quote

Originally posted by: ShyGuy
Ian has three mothers.

Gamer Law: If a friend talks you into buying a co-op game, they have to play it with you until it is beaten or you are sick of it.
This is definately a good one, I second this one getting into the 'Gamer Law' books, especially if they hype the games multi-player aspects.


Offline S-U-P-E-R

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #15 on: December 20, 2006, 04:17:03 PM »
- No whining that you don't want a challenger in Soul Calibur in the arcade when you're doing TEH CONQUEST mode! Go home and play Final Fantasy instead. :\

Offline WuTangTurtle

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #16 on: December 20, 2006, 11:18:53 PM »
Suprised no mod has moved this yet.

No Means No! - When told u are not allowed to play without the Wii Strap on, u better obey or you will learn the hard way.

Offline nitsu niflheim

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #17 on: December 21, 2006, 03:41:15 AM »
Don't bitch about a game you have never played, or seen outside of screenshots.
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Offline BlackNMild2k1

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #18 on: December 21, 2006, 05:24:36 AM »
Quote

Originally posted by: WuTangTurtle
Suprised no mod has moved this yet.

No Means No! - When told u are not allowed to play without the Wii Strap on, u better obey or you will learn the hard way.

*looks at watch again*

Yeah, they are gonna move it.... any......minute..... now......








....or not.

Offline BlackNMild2k1

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #19 on: December 21, 2006, 05:36:46 AM »
1) No Babysitting (this goes for movies & books too) - If you ask to borrow it I expect you to use/watch/read/play it, If I wanted it to sit somewhere and collect dust, it could've stayed on/in the shelf/box that I had it on/in. Oh and don't let someone else borrow my stuff, I loaned it to you, not to them.

2) You Break, You Buy - This should be known w/o having been said, but if I let you borrow something of mine that was working fine when I gave it to you, I expect it back in the same condition in which it left. If you come over and use something of mine, I expect you to respect my stuff and care for it as I would & only use it for its intended purposes. If you damage then you should fix or replace it, If I am not satisfied, then you should definately buy a NEW one. -Don't throw my controllers or games -Don't set my game disc on the carpet or table -Don't pretend you're a helicopter and swing my Wiimote around by the strap above your head. Thats how accidents happen.

Offline WuTangTurtle

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #20 on: December 21, 2006, 11:35:37 AM »
Let's try to keep these to a few sentences, otherwise I'll just edit them when i put them up on the list.  And if u want to put a nice little title for your law, it would be nice.  Plus I'm sure u guys can come up with better names than i could.  Thank u BlackNMild2k1 fo adding names, it saves me time

Offline BlackNMild2k1

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #21 on: December 21, 2006, 11:42:02 AM »
I saved you time on the names, but you spent it minimizing my speech/rant. Thanks! I just needed to get the whole point out, but I'm glad you put it in 30 words or less

Offline Requiem

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #22 on: December 21, 2006, 02:53:13 PM »
This list makes me depressed to be a gamer....just like how everyone hates those man-law commercial.

Since when has gaming become anything more than entertainment? Where did all this seriousness come from?

That said, some of that sh#t really bothers.
"Hey....

I'm not a whore, ok? Really.....really, I'm not.

But, if she slips man....if she slips, I slide!"

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Offline 18 Days

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #23 on: December 21, 2006, 09:28:07 PM »
A sub clause for VII Buzz Kill
You must confirm that all players are ready to resume playing.
pietriots.com
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Offline Nick DiMola

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #24 on: December 22, 2006, 01:59:50 AM »
Here's a new one:

No bitching or blaming glitches in a game when you lose to someone else. Accept your inferiority.
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Offline WuTangTurtle

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #25 on: December 22, 2006, 08:55:50 AM »
Quote

Originally posted by: Requiem
This list makes me depressed to be a gamer....just like how everyone hates those man-law commercial.

Since when has gaming become anything more than entertainment? Where did all this seriousness come from?

That said, some of that sh#t really bothers.


I don't mean any of these to be serious, its just for fun.  I mean im not really expecting anyone to really be arrested and trialed for Online Cheating, it would be hilarious but it would be a waste of tax payer dollars.  You can't tell me you have never felt atleast annoyed when one of these "Gamer Laws" have been broken.

Oh and if anyone has suggestions plz let me know.  Should i only update on the first page or should i just post a new copy every so often?

I see this is still in General Chat.......

Offline IceCold

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #26 on: December 22, 2006, 09:25:52 AM »
Quote

No bitching or blaming glitches in a game when you lose to someone else. Accept your inferiority.
It's the calibration! I swear!
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Offline wandering

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #27 on: December 22, 2006, 07:17:24 PM »
When discussing Final Fantasy VII, a gamer shall never spoil the fact that Aeris dies. Some people still haven't played it.

Quote

Originally posted by: UncleBob
Man laws eh?  Never heard of 'em.

Man Law #16888: A man shall never lie unless he knows for certain that he shall never be found out.
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Offline UncleBob

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #28 on: December 23, 2006, 01:11:45 AM »
Quote

Originally posted by: wandering
When discussing Final Fantasy VII, a gamer shall never spoil the fact that Aeris dies. Some people still haven't played it.

Quote

Originally posted by: UncleBob
Man laws eh?  Never heard of 'em.

Man Law #16888: A man shall never lie unless he knows for certain that he shall never be found out.


heh...
Just some random guy on the internet who has a different opinion of games than you.

Offline WuTangTurtle

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #29 on: December 23, 2006, 10:34:55 AM »
Quote

Originally posted by: wandering
When discussing Final Fantasy VII, a gamer shall never spoil the fact that Aeris dies. Some people still haven't played it.


I think we covered that with Spoil Alert, however that one is a pretty big one.  One that you may have spoiled for someone just now....

Offline nickmitch

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #30 on: December 23, 2006, 02:12:10 PM »
I think we sould add to the break it, buy it law that the breaker should pay the original retail that you paid for it as opposed to any player's choice price or anyother mark downs.
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Offline BlackNMild2k1

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #31 on: December 23, 2006, 02:19:57 PM »
Quote

I see this is still in General Chat.......


It'll move, just give more it time....

*starts tapping watch vigorously*

um, yeah....... more time....

Offline WuTangTurtle

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #32 on: December 27, 2006, 09:01:20 AM »
Recently i went to visit 2 friends that live like 40 miles away and i forgot to bring AV cables for my Wii, that night I was supposed to also see another friend about 20 miles away......On a much funnier note I felt like the guys on the Wii commercials.  Driving from one place to another and telling people "Wii would like to play".  I'm also AZN, Chinese (Twinkee) to be exact so the similarities were very much present.

So here is a new law:

When telling friends your bringing a console/handheld remember to bring all the essentials!  

Offline Athrun Zala

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #33 on: December 27, 2006, 10:23:46 AM »
Quote

Originally posted by: WuTangTurtle
Quote

Originally posted by: wandering
When discussing Final Fantasy VII, a gamer shall never spoil the fact that Aeris dies. Some people still haven't played it.


I think we covered that with Spoil Alert, however that one is a pretty big one.  One that you may have spoiled for someone just now....
LOL, reread wandering phrase please XD
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Offline EasyCure

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #34 on: December 27, 2006, 01:06:53 PM »
Quote

Originally posted by: WuTangTurtle
Recently i went to visit 2 friends that live like 40 miles away and i forgot to bring AV cables for my Wii, that night I was supposed to also see another friend about 20 miles away......On a much funnier note I felt like the guys on the Wii commercials.  Driving from one place to another and telling people "Wii would like to play".  I'm also AZN, Chinese (Twinkee) to be exact so the similarities were very much present.

So here is a new law:

When telling friends your bringing a console/handheld remember to bring all the essentials!



yeah seriously. everyone needs to hammer it into the persons head thats bringing the equipment. everyone responsible...

just last week we were having a wiiparty and my friend was supposed to bring back MY copy of red steel as well as monkeyball, marvel ultimate alliance and draganball z....

all he brought was red steel, or should i say THE CASE FOR IT. the game was still in his system and the other three he simply forgot at home... we were stuck playing wiisports all night
February 07, 2003, 02:35:52 PM
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Offline vudu

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #35 on: December 27, 2006, 02:39:07 PM »
If you ever send Ceric your copy of Beyond Good & Evil and he says he's going to send it back he won't.  Deal with it.
Why must all things be so bright? Why can things not appear only in hues of brown! I am so serious about this! Dull colors are the future! The next generation! I will never accept a world with such bright colors! It is far too childish! I will rage against your cheery palette with my last breath!

Offline IceCold

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RE: Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #36 on: December 27, 2006, 07:52:39 PM »
There's the tact I expect from you, vudu
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Offline WuTangTurtle

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RE:Gamer Law>Man Law
« Reply #37 on: December 29, 2006, 02:06:24 PM »
Quote

Originally posted by: vudu
If you ever send Ceric your copy of Beyond Good & Evil and he says he's going to send it back he won't.  Deal with it.


heh, i almost want to put that down as a law.  Something like, Ceric doesn't understand the word "borrow" so do not expect to ever see your games again.

Oh better yet:

The Giver - Do not let anyone borrow a game unless, A) They are a friend, B) You get something to borrow of equal value, or C) They are in Nut Kicking distance on a daily or weekly basis.  If none apply you just gave someboyd a free game, don't b!tch you were warned.

Edit:  New Law