(Warning - Health and Safety: Before playing, read the Gamer Law precautions booklet for important information about your health and safety. Do not take laws into you own hands, please contact someone who cares.)
Gamer Law
I. Continue Crooks - NO stealing continues unless given the okay, its not are fault u suck. (WuTangTurtle)
II. TV J Walkers - Sufficient warning is always required before walking in between a gamer and the TV. NO EXCEPTIONS, that burning building can wait five seconds. (Zach)
III. Game Posers – Cheating to beat a game and then bragging that you beat it all by yourself is illegal and punished by the removal of one (1) finger, other than the thumb. (Mr. Jack)
IV. The O.C. – Online Cheaters (Counter-Strike) are punishable by death. (Mr. Jack)
V. Mario Bros. before Ho’s – Never let a girl come between you and video games; bitches come and go, but Mario is for life. (vudu/matt oz)
VI. Spoiler Alert! – Never assume a fellow gamer has reached the same point in the game you’re playing, EVER. If you talk about a game avoid spoilers at all cost, especially for Zelda dammit). (EasyCure)
VII. Buzz Kill – Don’t pause a game without warning. I don’t care if you don’t know the moves in a fighting game, DEAL. It ruins the GOOD gamers flow when you have to pause and look at a skill/move list. (EasyCure)
Clause - You must confirm that all players are ready to resume playing. (18 Days)
VIII. Controller Etiquette – Wash your hands between snack breaks if you’re using someone else’s controllers. (EasyCure)
IX. File Imposing – Never play someone else’s file and save your progress. (EasyCure)
X. Walkthrough Wussies – Don’t use a Walkthrough, power level in a RPG, or play on anything but hard mode and call a game easy—it makes people want to smack you. (vudu)
XI. Co-op not Counter-op – Example: When playing Contra with two players co-ordinate your jumps during vertical platforming segments. Continue Crooks get a waiver if they have been Counter-opted. (Ian Sane)
XII. Follow Through – If a friend talks you into buying a co-op game, they have to play it with you until it is beaten or you are sick of it. Example: FF: Crystal Chronicles. (ShyGuy)
XIII. New Challenger - No whining that you don't want a challenger in Soul Calibur in the arcade when you're doing TEH CONQUEST mode! Go home and play Final Fantasy instead. :\ (S-U-P-E-R)
XIV. No Means No! - When told u are not allowed to play without the Wii Strap on, u better obey or you will learn the hard way. (WuTangTurtle)
XV. Gamer Prejudice - Don't bitch about a game you have never played, or seen outside of screenshots. (nitsu niflheim)
XVI. No Babysitting - (movies & books too) If you ask to borrow it I expect you to use/watch/read/play it, If I wanted it to sit somewhere and collect dust, it could've stayed on/in the shelf/box that I had it on/in. Oh and don't let someone else borrow my stuff, I loaned it to you, not to them. (BlackNMild2k1)
XVII. You Break, You Buy - You shouldn't mishandle people's stuff, I mean how would you like it if your girlfriend mishandeld your B@lls? You Break, You Buy. Period. (BlackNMild2k1)
Clause - Payment should be original MSRP, or decided on in a peaceful manner. (TVman)
XVIII. Accept Inferiority - No bitching or blaming glitches in a game when you lose to someone else. Accept your inferiority. (Mr. Jack)
XIX. Have Fun - Don't take things too seriously, MMORPG mass suicides are not cool. Same thing applies to literally punching someone in Wii Boxing, although it may be fun...(WuTangTurtle)
XX. Pack it in - When telling a friend you are bringing a console/handheld be sure to bring everything you need such as a AV cable or power supply. Remember its not as fun imagining playing a video game....(WuTangTurtle)
XXI. The Giver - Do not let anyone borrow a game unless, A) They are a friend, B) You get something to borrow of equal value, or C) They are in Nut Kicking distance on a daily or weekly basis. If none apply you just gave somebody a free game, don't b!tch you were warned. (Vudu)