I'm just going to have to copy what I said over at CAG here...
I think what Nintendo needs to do is grow some balls and tell everyone to piss the hell off when they are playing the Wii version, by taking a page from the old FPS games of yore, such as Duke Nukem 3D, Wolfenstein, and Rise of the Triad. In these games, you chose your difficulty based on normally-demoralizing messages that indicated just how hard you wanted the game.
So if you were a total badass, you chose "They call me the cleaner" or "BRING 'EM ON." If you were a total pussy, you chose "Mommy I'm scared!" or "I can only play with the lights on!"
Before you start the game, you'll go to a screen, and it will ask you what interface mode you want to be.
If you chose normal controls, it says "Help I'm Jigglypuff's fat cousin." If you chose a hybrid of sorts (maybe you just cut out sword motion, opting only for buttons for attacks), you chose "I'm only 50% pussy." If you choose the full motion one, it's "I am Zatoichi.....bitches."
That'd show'em. Who the f*ck doesn't want to be Zatoichi?
Apparently pussies and jigglypuff cousins....bitches.
In fact, Reggie's digitized head should float on the screen when you are chosing your interface, and hopelessly remind you that he could slap you with his dick at any second if he really wanted, because he knows where you sleep, bitch.