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[Your controller is bugged.]

1

Podcast Discussion / Episode 930: GameStop Counterintelligence Department

« on: Today at 11:35:43 AM »

Your controller is bugged.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/71502/episode-930-gamestop-counterintelligence-department

At Radio Free Nintendo, we all love the Big Ape. This is a mater of established lore, originally stated during the gone-but-not-recovered Now Playing segments.

While writing this, it lead me to contemplate if "The Big Ape" is an accurate nom de guerre* for Donkey Kong. Do not underestimate my ability to get off-track: we are now going to quote The Center for Great Apes list of things that define an Ape.

• Hair instead of fur - The difference is largely a function of how it grows. Fur generally grows to length and stops/falls out, but hair grows long as it allowed to do. DK has a quaff so I'm going to say that counts.
• Fingernails instead of claws - DK's hands are almost always clenched in a fist, but I was able to confirm fingernails in some art.
• Opposable thumbs - Fists, see above.
• Higher brain-to-body size ratio, high level of intelligence - He can tie a tie, operate vehicles, etc. Have you seen a marmot ride a rhino?
• Prehensility - Again, the fists are doing a lot of work here.
• Padded digits with fingerprints - Unknown at this time.
• Binocular vision - Depth perception is a prerequisite for his punch-based lifestyle. Fists keep winning.
• Reduced olfactory sense - Also unknown at this time.

I would say we have enough checkmarks here to conclude that DK is, in fact, an ape. However, there is an additional line from The Center for Great Apes that I find interesting:

People often confuse apes and monkeys. Although there are a number of differences between apes and monkeys (apes have a longer lifespan, larger body size, larger brain-to-body size ratio, and higher intelligence); the main difference is that monkeys have tails and apes do not have tails.

Diddy Kong is NOT an ape, is dumb, and is going to die before DK. Get wrecked, idiot.

Anyway, Donkey Kong Bananza had a Direct on Wednesday. It was about fifteen minutes of gameplay and story content - not least of which the reveal that DK's sidekick in this game is an adolescent Pauline. This raises all kinds of lore questions about the DK/Pauline relationship that everyone has already meme'd to death, so I will not indulge. The important things to remember are:

1. Pauline, as a human, is also an ape.
2. Diddy is not.
3. Diddy will depart this mortal world much earlier than DK

DK is just looking for his replacement for the doomed Diddy.

James has some lengthy, rambling, confused New Business for Fantasy Life i: The Girl Who Steals Time. There are so many systems and "lives" that feed into the economy of this game, he has an impossible time offering anything other than incoherence. Mine your ore, to make a better saw, to cut down better trees, to craft better tools, to craft yet still better tools, so you can finally have a good weapon. Help.

A break was obviously needed after that segment. On the return, we have more New Business. Jon has been amassing consoles he no longer needs, and attempted to take advantage of GameStop's relatively generous trade in offers in order to upgrade his console as a bang-on effect of upgrading a different console. He was not prepared for Special Agent Steve of the GameStop InfoSec team. It's a different kind of bug hunt at GIS. Greg leads updates on Mario Kart World and F-Zero GX. It is very interesting that two of the major products for Switch 2 are racing games with unique for their series single player components. Mario Kart World is a really big game. Guillaume and James tested out the GameChat function on Switch 2, streaming a few games at each other - including F-Zero GX, Mario Kart World, and Fantasy Life i. He's also got some hands-on with the Switch 2 Pro Controller.

In an effort to do some kind of Lister Mail, this week we try to put marketing campaigns together for some of the many companies represented in Mario Kart World. You can send us your pitches here.

* As a note, it isn't an epithet, because I never refer to him as Donkey Kong The Big Ape, it's a full replacement. However, calling it a nom de guerre isn't accurate either - he didn't give it to himself to serve as an alias. This is best regarded as a nickname. I refuse to learn from this experience and will continue to confuse these title types until I rejoin the soil.

[That aurochs? A bit **** to be honest.]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 929: James Jones - Neanderthal Art Critic

« on: June 15, 2025, 11:15:42 AM »

That aurochs? A bit **** to be honest.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/71390/episode-929-james-jones-neanderthal-art-critic

Most of the cave art we think of, particularly the art around Montignac-Lascaux, are Magdalenian culture - that is to say painted by modern humans dated to between 20,000 and 10,000 years ago. That isn't to say there weren't Neanderthal artists, drawing on caves, at some point prior to their extinction ~40,000 years ago. However, we only really have direct evidence of that in Spain - art predating Cro-Magnon arrival in Europe. However their art was less anatomical drawing of animals and more handprints, dots, and the repeated use of a ladder motif. It's also much older, so its survival is going to inherently be more spotty than their later successors.

To summarize, their art blew cheeks.

Also, this is off the dome, and I refuse to look anything in the above up (excepting how to spell Magdalenian and Montignac-Lascaux) - fact check THIS! You can imagine where I am tauntingly pointing to suggest fact checkers "do their job."

Fully modern James is the critic, not a James with a pronounced brow-ridge and a beret. Just envision Hot Tub Time Machine, but actually funny.

THIS WEEK Jon has his Switch 2, lovingly delivered from the corporate arms of bestbuy.com, LLC. As such, we let him give some early console thoughts and lead our deep dive into Mario Kart World. We, and presumably every Switch 2 owner on Earth, have been playing this game. Boy, does it feel like you can get just wrecked by shell-after shell-after shell. Just imagine, Jon in his living room, getting decimated by a cavalcade of red shells. It's weirdly calming.

Also a new Splatoon single player game got announced.

Somehow - this results in a bunch of other stuff. I don't understand this show either.

We take a break to preserve our mental health, but alas we must resume. And resume we do. Guillaume makes an impassioned case that you should try F-Zero GX, now on the NSO Expansion Pack service on Switch 2. This is a path I do not advocate, mostly because of the murderousness he's embraced. Honestly, it's about what you'd expect from him. To sate his bloodlust, he's also been playing Switch game Valfaris - a 2D platform shooter that is all about big guns, big enemies, and big violence.

Greg took a look at the Switch 2-focused patch for Splatoon 3 that just came out. He has some thoughts on the extra pop of HDR, and the super-stable framerate that only Switch 2 can offer. They don't call it "super-stable framerate," but they should. I'm doing Nintendo's marketing work for them.

Again.

Lastly James, your esteemed author and artisan, has been playing the Switch 2 version of Fantasy Life i: The Girl Who Steals Time. I've dealt with many time thieves: children, auditors, management types, inspectors but I've never dealt with a child time thief.

Wait... ANYWAY. I'd really just started the game at the time of recording so my impressions are basically just the tutorial. Hopefully I'll be much further on when we record next week. Should be a given, unless I run into... well you know.

Submit your Paleolithic drawings here.

[The key to maximizing your Italian isn't genetic, it's pas-tetic]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 928: Ultra-Italian Luigi

« on: June 08, 2025, 06:09:57 PM »

The key to maximizing your Italian isn't genetic, it's pas-tetic

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/71317/episode-928-ultra-italian-luigi

The Switch 2 has arrived, and with it Jon and James have returned.

For three weeks, you have been spared J&J Nightmare Factory, and now they return like a dark specter stalking the lands. Crops will fail, children will quake, dogs will... pee in places it is inconvenient for you as a pet owner...

I really can't fathom having a dog and having carpeted floors. It just seems like you're asking to fight a losing battle, between the shedding and the urine. And lord, just the general smell. Hardwood is the way to go...

Wait, sorry Switch 2.

We start the show with some impressions of the hardware, and the process of getting it. James bought Nintendo Switch 2 Welcome Tour (00:11:33) FOR YOU! He has impressions FOR YOU about the challenges, facts, quizzes, and yes the fact it has a price tag. After a break, we go into the game that...literally everyone is talking about, Mario Kart World (00:59:33). Keep in mind, Switch 2 had only been out 20 hours as of recording, so treat this as early impressions.

Beyond Switch 2, we also address... GameCube games on NSO for Switch 2 (02:06:23)! The fact NES Bionic Commando is in Street Fighter 6... ON SWITCH 2! And the new convenient ways to post screenshots and video on... you get the joke.

An artist is never appreciated in his time, I'm going to go watch more Mr. Iguana matches!

[That tank needs more water.]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 926: BMX XXX Spiritual Cleanse

« on: May 11, 2025, 09:17:00 AM »

That tank needs more water.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70997/episode-926-bmx-xxx-spiritual-cleanse

This week we have a real New Business segment! James is playing the new (to Switch) adventure game Endless Monday: Dreams and Deadlines (00:04:41) - a game about being a procrastinating artist working at a nameless corporation. It's very weird in the best possible way. Jon has finished Castlevania: Circle of the Moon (00:16:22) and is already planning his next Dracula murder. Greg gives a brief update on Crypt of the Necrodancer and a more beefy update on Xenoblade Chronicles X new Chapter 13 (00:22:19). Guillaume is running out of Pixel Remasters, with his impressions of Final Fantasy VI Pixel Remaster (00:44:23).

After a break we knock-out a duo of listener mail: Cleaning up more games with F.L.U.D.D. (00:56:27) and the best one-off Nintendo series (01:17:46). Send em, or I'll get the hose.

We mention it in the episode, but we'll be taking a two week vacation just due to scheduling challenges. Next week we'll drop one of our old Patreon episodes on the feed. The subsequent week, the plan is to just be out-out.

[Move out, deploy that Kong!]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 925: DK Order 66

« on: May 04, 2025, 12:55:04 PM »

Move out, deploy that Kong!

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70936/episode-925-dk-order-66

The Kong has had it too good for too long. It's time for a change.

This week we start with Listener Mail. Is Nintendo dropping Fire Emblem hints (00:02:44)? Is Melee coming to Switch 2 Virtual Console (00:13:07)? Is F-Zero back for real (01:02:13)? How would we build a Yoko Shimomura best-of album? Where can you ask? Why, here!

After a break we have some New Business. Greg has an update on Xenoblade Chronicles X (01:36:58) and he's also playing some Rift of the Necrodancer (01:41:19). Guillaume is looking at the NSO preview games Star Wars: Bounty Hunter Remaster (01:44:02) and Star Wars: Episode I: Jedi Power Battles (01:55:29). Lastly, a look at Lonely Mountains: Snow Riders (02:02:30) and Final Fantasy VI Pixel Remaster (02:13:30). Jon doesn't have much to update and James has disappeared.

[Bring order to this era where I can't order anything.]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 924: It's The Dumb **** Era

« on: April 27, 2025, 04:41:39 PM »

Bring order to this era where I can't order anything.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70863/episode-924-its-the-dumb-****-era

This week we talk about trying to order a Switch 2 (00:02:05), which turns into a post-mortem for various websites. All three of us did succeed, despite the best (and worst) efforts of our favored retailers. James uses extreme skill in transitions to get us to LISTENER MAIL - why are so many Switch 2 games only key cards (00:51:02) and should someone buy Xenoblade Chronicles X Definitive Edition if they already have the Wii U release (01:06:27).

This leads to another graceful transition where James gives his New Business - having now completed X's new content, Guillaume is mired in The Gunk (01:26:11), and Jon is exploring Castlevania: Circle of the Moon (01:36:36).

Email here.

[Funny enough, the sequel to IV is also II.]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 923: RFN World: Podcast Boys IV (The Sequel to RFN World II)

« on: April 20, 2025, 06:04:18 PM »

Funny enough, the sequel to IV is also II.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70793/episode-923-rfn-world-podcast-boys-iv-the-sequel-to-rfn-world-ii

We were due. It had been a long time since technology reached down and smote us like an angry god. Years of offerings, prayers, and ritual had kept Hephaestus Kyllopodion from the field.

But not today.

Today Hera spoke, he rose, and boiled us like Xanthos with a only a minor effort.

So yeah, we recorded a segment about the Mario Kart World Direct, and then lost it. Sucks, happens.

So our second attempt to start the show instead pivots to our RetroActive for Wonder Boy: The Dragon's Trap (00:00:00). There are disagreements between people who think the decision to leave this game horribly out of date was a mistake and people who are otherwise incorrect. We then try to re-do our reaction to the Mario Kart World Direct (01:36:32), but it kind of turns into a tribute to an episode you'll never hear.

[Will it be more horrifying to see the image I create or read the title I give it?]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 922: Monkey Mouthful Mode

« on: April 13, 2025, 02:55:22 PM »

Will it be more horrifying to see the image I create or read the title I give it?

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70728/episode-922-monkey-mouthful-mode

This week, Nintendo is "refreshing" the eShop and this attempt at professionalism cannot be allowed to stand (00:00:31)! Then James spends entirely too long talking about Xenoblade Chronicles X (00:07:26) before finally ceding the floor to Greg and Jon to do the same (00:48:11). Guillaume has wrapped up Final Fantasy V (01:10:21), and moved onto Playdate, the handheld with a crank (01:17:08)!

After the break, we have the necessary and unpleasant conversation about the tariff question (01:31:41). It's a bit rambling, and despite James' pledge that he "doesn't want to get political" it does a bit. It's unavoidable. It's also stupid and irresponsible. The events, not the conversation. Unwilling to end the show on such a downer, we do take on a single Listener Mail question: condemning someone to life inside the Monkey Ball (02:17:07). You can sign-up for a prison of eternal motion sickness by sending us an email.

As of now, the plan is to do our RetroActive for Wonder Boy: The Dragon's Trap next week. I know it's been a bit harried around here the last few weeks, so we've been under-advertising it. Get your comments in either via email or the NWR Discord.

[But she's got a new hat!]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 921: She’s Just a Regular Fish Bone With a Stupid Cheap Hat

« on: April 02, 2025, 10:53:44 PM »

But she's got a new hat!

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70620/episode-921-shes-just-a-regular-fish-bone-with-a-stupid-cheap-hat

Today was the Nintendo Switch 2 Direct. We are joined by friend of the show Syrenne McNulty to help sort through all the news that came out of today's barrage of headlines, developer interviews, YouTube videos, Nintendo Today updates, press releases, etc.

Obviously, we cover a lot of ground.

Topics include: Donkey Kong Bananza, Mario Kart World, the C-Button meaning GameChat, GameShare, a camera accessory, a wheel accessory, pricing, release dates, The Duskbloods, Switch 2 Editions, upgrade path, hardware features, and a ton more. This is an incredibly busy show.

This is a three hour show, turned around as quickly as we could, so please excuse the rough edits and the short notes (without timelines). If someone wants to contribute highlight timing, I'll add them in.

Also, because we ran so very long, we didn't get to your Switch 2 Emails. We will next week, so please send them in.

[You'll have to provide your own hand gestures.]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 920: RFN Today Brings the Podcast Directly to You

« on: March 30, 2025, 05:19:31 PM »

You'll have to provide your own hand gestures.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70494/episode-920-rfn-today-brings-the-podcast-directly-to-you

This week, Nintendo surprised us with a Direct for Switch games, less than a week before the Direct for Switch 2.

So, instead of spending a bunch of time talking about Xenoblade Chronicles X, we spend a lot of time talking about: Rhythm Heaven Groove, "Virtual Game Cards," more SaGa stuff, Sony games coming to Switch under the Namco Bandai flag, Tomodachi Life, Metroid Prime 4, of course Nintendo Today, and more.

Next week is the Switch 2 Direct, and so send your questions now...well, after, I guess.

[I love you too, robot.]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 919: Your Number 5 Podcast for 16-bit Koei Games According to Robots

« on: March 23, 2025, 06:21:00 PM »

I love you too, robot.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70347/episode-919-your-number-5-podcast-for-16-bit-koei-games-according-to-robots

This week, a bunch of Koei SNES games coming to NSO (00:01:14), perfect for the #5 Strategy Podcast.

Also, Xenoblade Chronicles X is out. We have a lot to say, considering we'd played a combined six hours (00:21:04). Jon is also playing a different open world game, Monster Hunter Wilds (01:05:54). Guillaume is still catching up on Super Smash Bros. Ultimate (01:016:57), and we take a trip down RFN memory lane.

After a break we tackle a Listener Mail question about the "ideal" Switch 2 year one (01:40:24) and give our Switchmas 2, the Re-Switchening predictions. Email me.

[If the answer is "yes," consider turning it into a allegory at least. Those are "creative."]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 918: Ask Yourself, "Am I Writing a Manifesto Right Now?"

« on: March 16, 2025, 03:37:06 PM »

If the answer is "yes," consider turning it into a allegory at least. Those are "creative."

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70286/episode-918-ask-yourself-am-i-writing-a-manifesto-right-now

Jon Lindemann would accuse me of writing a manifesto every week if he didn't think it would result in me declaring "okay, you write it!" But, this week, we start the show with an actual Xenoblade manifesto in the form of the "UNOFFICIAL Xenoblade Chronicles X review guide," and we force James to explain how it wasn't him (00:02:04). We then dig into elements of games that are so good, we don't notice them (00:40:32), before wrapping Listener Mail with some thoughts on the Nintendo Music app (01:03:50).

After a break, we dive into a small dose of New Business with Greg's look at Ninja Five-O/Ninja Cop (01:34:20). Lastly, we close out with the announcement of our next RetroActive Wonder Boy and the Dragon's Trap, for Switch.

Email us, I guess.

[Fictional characters can't order layoffs. We think.]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 917: Our Best CEO Doesn't Exist

« on: March 09, 2025, 03:15:16 PM »

Fictional characters can't order layoffs. We think.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70207/episode-917-our-best-ceo-doesnt-exist

Greg was unable to make it to recording this week, and given the circumstances we were forced to punt on naming our next RetroActive. I would say the plan is now to name it next week, but I worry I'm tempting fate.

James is without New Business that any of you would care about, so he turns the show over to Guillaume who has some final thoughts on Final Fantasy III Pixel Remaster, and yes, Final Fantasy IV Pixel Remaster (00:08:04). If you're wondering "does he also do V," the answer is "not today." He also has some fuller thoughts on 1000xRESIST (00:29:15), a sci-fi story that has some things to say and he really enjoyed. Jon is, predictably, playing a lot of Monster Hunter Wilds (00:52:13). He's got some thoughts on some of the more controversial decisions in the game's design.

Did you know we have a website? Did you know you're on it right now? Did you know Jon writes descriptions of stupid images and James makes stupid images? This is all news (01:17:49).

After this earthshattering revelation, we actually manage TWO Listener Mail questions. This week we rank Nintendo systems by consensus (01:22:35) and we figure out which of four alarmingly poor candidates would maximize Nintendo's profits (02:08:53). You can transfer stolen funds into our bank account here.

[Finally, a good Mario Movie.]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 916: Bowser's Fury Road

« on: March 01, 2025, 03:55:41 PM »

Finally, a good Mario Movie.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70100/episode-916-bowsers-fury-road

This week we kick the show off with a brief chat on the Pokémon Presents from earlier in the day. A lot of the content isn't of much interest to the crew, but Pokémon Legends: Z-A gets plenty of discussion time. With that, there are a lot of questions about the wisdom of a city for Pokémon.

We also review your submissions for our next RetroActive (00:28:27). Most of you understood the assignment, but the predicted ne'er do wells did... no... wells. We don't pick a game, but we ran through your submissions. We'll announce the game next week.

Additionally, James buys an amiibo. I don't know either. He does though.

After the break we tackle THREE EMAILS!

...we picked THREE EMAILS.

...we only did a single email (00:59:04). This week we figure out what the next Mario Kart could be to break new ground. You too can send us email we'll never get to.

[GIVE LINK A CAR!]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 915: Here's Link, and He's Pissed!

« on: February 23, 2025, 04:12:50 PM »

GIVE LINK A CAR!

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/70048/episode-915-heres-link-and-hes-pissed

This week, Nintendo put a knife in the back of Gold Points and gave some bad news on the vouchers you already have (00:00:58).

After we dig into this news, we launch into NEW BUSINESS! Gui is digging into more Final Fantasy Pixel Remasters. He gives final thoughts on II (00:17:02) before moving onto III (00:30:39). He also talks about his personal choice in physical Game Boy emulator the TrimUI Brick. James wrote a review on Stories from Sol: The Gun-Dog, and he wants to tell you about it (00:40:30). Greg is looking at the latest addition to the GBA Nintendo Switch Online games, Wario Land 4 (00:56:25).

After a break, Listener Mail continues to give no hecks about time constraints, digging into gaming experiences that were lost to time (01:24:21). Send 'em or end 'em.

[James confused two brain-dead Sony shooters. Sony will forgive him because they forgot either series existed.]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 914: EAT MY NUANCE

« on: February 16, 2025, 03:46:23 PM »

James confused two brain-dead Sony shooters. Sony will forgive him because they forgot either series existed.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/69977/episode-914-eat-my-nuance

This week, James has actual real New Business with Stories from Sol: the Gun Dog (00:07:55). And to be clear, I mean minutes of it, because that's all he had played at that point. That's okay, he shows all y'all why there are games he "just doesn't talk about here" when he tries to describe the bewildering experience that was adapting to A Total War Saga: Thrones of Britannia (00:14:13). Playing like the pillagers he's fighting just feels dirty.

Jon is intent on doing the most confusing thing possible with two PSP to PS4/5 ports: Killzone: Liberation and Resistance: Retribution (00:25:40). This Nintendo-focused audience immediately conflates the two series in their heads, which is more headspace than Sony is giving them. o7 Rico. Jon and James then go talk about all kinds of random bullshit.

James' commentary: My notes on this segment just say "3DO-no" and "Wait, why are we talking about this?"

Guillaume continues to confirm that Super Smash Bros. Ultimate is a good game (00:57:43). He also confirms via the Pixel Remaster that Final Fantasy II really isn't. He's also playing the Xbox One Killer Instinct? What a strange line-up we have this week.

Greg takes us back from the depth of this New Business degeneracy with a perfectly normal look at Wario Land 4, now on NSO+Pack (01:12:31).

After the break, we try to tackle our inbox backlog. This would be a great transition but first we break down the latest much more boring Investors Briefing (01:15:52). Then we tackle a Listener Mail question: how to approach a backlog (01:30:15).

You can make our backlog increasingly menacing by doing the thing we ask you to do.

[I will not.]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 913: Mario Is Curious, if You Will

« on: February 09, 2025, 12:24:56 PM »

I will not.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/69894/episode-913-mario-is-curious-if-you-will

This week we're going to keep it quick!

Greg has the Switch port Donkey Kong Country Returns HD (00:02:06). James is angry at Nintendo for putting more garbage [Super Ninja Boy] on Nintendo Switch Online (00:33:13). Guillaume has beaten the first Final Fantasy in its Pixel Remaster form (00:58:13). He's also been playing Ridge Racer 64 (01:13:32), also on NSO. Lastly, he's playing bad arcade games (01:18:16).

After a break we hit Listener Mail: Tactics Ogre or Unicorn Overlord (01:27:04), we guess some more C-Words (01:44:43), and we review our memories of Super Mario Bros. on its impending anniversary (01:49:03). Email me; I miss you

[Contact the Braintal team; we got a corker for them.]

18

Podcast Discussion / Episode 912: Mi-AI-moto Has Gone Rogue, All Tables Are In Danger

« on: February 02, 2025, 02:53:47 PM »

Contact the Braintal team; we got a corker for them.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/69827/episode-912-mi-ai-moto-has-gone-rogue-all-tables-are-in-danger

This week SEGA has a business idea for you: business ideas (00:00:00). Imagine waking up and saying "What would SEGA think of this problem?"

We asked for your "investor questions," which is a polite way of saying we asked you to make fun of the investor briefings. We got more content than we had time for. What we did get to: can we literally kill physical games (00:20:50), can we deflate the Japanese economy (00:29:15), why don't we [Nintendo] have an MOMRPG (00:46:12), AI and Google trying valiantly to summarize AI (00:55:11), Swixbox (01:13:55), bringing back Miitomo as a blockchain scam (01:25:29) and flooding the eShop for maximum income (01:38:36). Y'all are demented.

After a break, we roll into some New Business. Guillaume is playing 3DS launch game Ridge Racer 3D (01:50:07), which is nicely timed to the release of Ridge Racer 64 on NSO. He is also upgrading his Xbox for reasons unknown even to us (02:07:14). Jon is trapped in No Man's Sky and its endless new content (02:15:38). Greg has DKC: Returns (02:27:41) and we also talk about the new SNES expansion game Sutte Hakkun.

Send Emails.

[Being Jon Lindemann is a constant state of being with Jon Lindemann.]

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Podcast Discussion / Episode 911: I'm Not Trapped In Here With You, I'm Trapped In Here With Me!

« on: January 26, 2025, 04:54:03 PM »

Being Jon Lindemann is a constant state of being with Jon Lindemann.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/69756/episode-911-im-not-trapped-in-here-with-you-im-trapped-in-here-with-me

This week we did our Top Five Games of 2024.

For those unfamiliar with the ritual, as performed by RFN, there are effectively zero rules. The broad guidelines are any game from 2024 on Nintendo systems. Neither of these criteria are rules, both are flexible. At a minimum, it should at least be a game you played in 2024, but even there we have seen games not played in the relevant year. Admittedly, those were exceptional cases.

Additionally, given this outrageously loose guideline, it would be impossible for us to attempt to reach some kind of consensus on a collective Top Five, so the list is personal.

There is, of course, overlap. The #1 spot is shared on two lists. You will not guess the game - in this I have immense confidence. I am likewise sure that someone will message us saying they did guess it, but I know they speak in lies.

Whisper your digital deceptions into our electronic ears.

[Coprolalia. Look it up. Oh, and Switch 2, I guess.]

20

Podcast Discussion / Episode 910: Trying Out New C-Words

« on: January 18, 2025, 01:50:48 PM »

Coprolalia. Look it up. Oh, and Switch 2, I guess.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/69683/episode-910-trying-out-new-c-words

Nintendo chose to do something we greatly cherish, choosing to circulate their Switch 2 commercial well-prior to RFN's creation. We know this is a chastened Nintendo; historically they would have churlishly commenced such a commercialized announcement either after we commenced, or even at the conclusion of our recording. Our past castigations have changed their considerations.

Alright, that's enough of that crap.

We obviously start the episode talking about the Switch 2 video. 141 seconds of content caused an hour of conversations. Sorry, I promise that's the last one.

We talked about the weird mouse-looking thing, the mysterious C-Button, the Mario Kart, the fact it matched all the leaks, and the upcoming Direct and tours.

After we conc...finish, we move onto New Business. James conveniently, given the Switch 2/mouse whatever that was, played WarioWare: Move It! over the last week. It's shockingly thin, and he finished with it in record time. He also picked up Unicorn Overlord again, for reasons unknown even to him. Oh good, a fugue state. Cool Cool.

Crap.

Jon finished Firewatch and he wants you to know he did not cry! He also bought Titanfall 2 for literally two dollars. You should play Titanfall 2's single player campaign - it's stunning. Also Jedi Fallen Order/Survivor. They are likewise amazing.

Guillaume decided, as Switch 2 is being announced, it was finally time to try out Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. It is, in fact, always time.

Greg is finding his inner Jimmy Woods with Nintendo World Championship. It's pretty much exactly what you expect it to be, although the weekly challenges are a nice inclusion.

It's time for emails. It's time for our top 5 games. It's time for you to play investor again and send us questions for our "RFN Investor QA" on Switch 2. Help us, help you, help us channel our inner Nintendo executives. Here.

[The silk fabric cleans the screen automatically.]

21

Podcast Discussion / Episode 909: Hiding a Switch In Our Giant Vest Pocket

« on: January 12, 2025, 02:31:05 PM »

The silk fabric cleans the screen automatically.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/69644/episode-909-hiding-a-switch-in-our-giant-vest-pocket

Jon is back, and so is Xenoblade Chronicles X (00:01:54)!  

After we spend entirely too long dissecting three minute the trailer, we tackle some Listener Mail. First we try to break-down how the Switch's successor should/will be announced (00:26:57). Then, we name the most infamous Nintendo final bosses and the best Zelda bosses (00:53:58).

After a break, we roll onto New Business. First, Greg finally wraps up Mario and Luigi: Brothership(01:38:54). Jon spent his travel time with Metroid Prime Remastered (02:00:10), Contra Anniversary Collection (02:04:58), and Firewatch. Guillaume wraps up New Business with 1000xResist (02:09:43).

Send em.

[This restaurant specializes in the tenderest of orders.]

22

Podcast Discussion / Episode 906: Greg and I Both Went "Man-Flesh"

« on: December 22, 2024, 09:14:00 AM »

This restaurant specializes in the tenderest of orders.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/69520/episode-906-greg-and-i-both-went-man-flesh

This week we're back at full strength, and we recorded two episodes to get us through the holiday season.

Episode 906 is an email show. We planned to do about 90 minutes and a few emails. Frequent listeners can finish this thought. For those who cannot: we only did two emails and it took over two hours. The first email asks if our personal "top" games list is constantly evolving and the second is - and I am not making a joke - a Jon Lindemann trivia contest (00:50:02). You would think Jon would have a commanding advantage in such an exercise. You would be incorrect.

You can send us less insane games here.

Next week is our RetroActive on Professor Layton and the Curious Village, but like I said earlier - it's already been recorded.

[The prequel that you weren't ready for.]

23

Podcast Discussion / Episode 904: Bi-Force Warriors

« on: December 09, 2024, 05:30:27 AM »

The prequel that you weren't ready for.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/69415/episode-904-bi-force-warriors

This week, Jon returns - ignorant of the previous episode's shenanigans at his expense. Guillaume starts New Business with Tetris Party and Alien Storm (00:01:53) and spends the bulk of his time describing Inscryption (00:09:14). James got Arc Systems Works' KILL la KILL -IF during the Black Friday sale for ONE DOLLAR. It's a weird anime arena fighter, telling the side story of very naked titular anime (00:22:57). Jon bought a PlayStation VR2 (00:34:25) on sale, and also played a bit of Castlevania: Dominus Collection (00:50:19). Greg closes New Business with an update on Mario and Luigi: Brothership (00:54:51).

After a break, we tackle a couple Listener Mail. This week we're asked what can Metroid Prime 4 do to be a true capstone of the lessons of Switch (01:10:42) and what we would play if sentenced to a cabin in the wilderness together (01:35:52). Murder, most likely. You can send your hypotheticals here.

[This remake has hit a snag.]

24

Podcast Discussion / Episode 902: Japanese Tom Hardy

« on: November 24, 2024, 03:03:49 PM »

This remake has hit a snag.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/69280/episode-902-japanese-tom-hardy

This week, we expand on our 1-900-103-4RFN offers with a deep dive on Death Wish 4 (00:00:26). This was nominally part of the introduction, but RFN will always RFN.

After a remarkable amount of time spent on a segment that exists only to let new listeners establish our voices/names and inform the other listeners if Jon is out (likely), we roll into NEW BUSNESS! Greg has a short update on Mario & Luigi: Brothership and then leads a conversation on new NSO offering: Donkey Kong Land (00:13:38). James is back on his... considerate behavior with the newly-released KUUKYOMI 4: Consider It (00:31:04). It's getting hard to talk about these things, they're all the same but they're still stupid fun. Guillaume has some final thoughts about Trials of Mana (00:39:54), and it turns out its a really good game. It's also part of the Nintendo Black Friday sale. He's significantly less positive on the Amazon series Like a Dragon: Yakuza (00:45:43). Jon bought Skyrim, again (01:05:01). This time it's on PS5 and he's actually playing it. He and James also crack strategy on buying vouchers for the eShop and Xbox Live - it's almost game time for these two.

After a break, the crew pull together a list of eight Nintendo DS games, two each, to deliberate over selecting our game for The Nintendo DS 20th Anniversary Retroactive (01:15:27). What did we pick? Listen and find out.

Feed the beast!

[A bargain at any price; that price happens to be $10.99/minute.]

25

Podcast Discussion / Episode 901: 1-900-103-4RFN

« on: November 17, 2024, 04:23:51 PM »

A bargain at any price; that price happens to be $10.99/minute.

http://www.nintendoworldreport.com/rfn/69119/episode-901-1-900-103-4rfn

This week, we start the show without the pressures of 900.

Instead, we talk Universal Studios Donkey Kong Direct, or whatever insane thing they named it (00:02:29). Do you want a hotdog covered in guacamole, or some other nightmare food concoction? Well, you'll have to fly to Japan, because when Epic Universe opens in Orlando next year, they definitely wont have this stuff.

After we finish educating on theme parks, it's time for NEW BUSINESS. James promised you Ys X: Nordics impressions, and Ys X: Nordics impressions he has (00:27:20). In fact, he's basically 100%'d the game. It's a nice return to the exploration of Ys VIII: Lacrimosa of DANA but this time by ship. Both games come highly recommended. Ys IX: Monstrum Nox, you can skip buggy mess.

Guillaume is playing the remake of  Trials of Mana (2020) (00:49:03). He had put off playing this game, because Square Enix in their infinite wisdom had just released Trials of Mana on the Collection of Mana a year prior. With enough time between then and now, he's enjoying this modern remake of the game we (previously) never got in the west.

Greg has even newer business than James, with early impressions of Mario and Luigi: Brothership (01:06:25). He's really just getting started, so he's able to talk about what's new this time around.

After a break, we tackle a single LISTNER MAIL! This time we try to burden our pockets with extra bones by running a pay-to-call 900 number for the RFN Brand. Join in on our business planning session (01:21:37). You can give us more scams ideas via in the inbox.