Author Topic: Possibly the funniest statement ever  (Read 27965 times)

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Offline Stogi

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Possibly the funniest statement ever
« on: September 07, 2008, 04:59:03 PM »
Last night, I was getting hammered celebrating a girlfriend's birthday and of course, our conversation lead us to the subject of sex and what not.

Like clockwork, the girls started talking about dick size; mainly discussing the average size. Needless to say, **** was getting awkward, but coming through in the clutch was my friend who jumped up with his hands on his head, coincidentally, looking exactly like my pooh avatar and yelled out with such enthusiasm:

"If I had a really hot chick in my bed and it turned out that she had penis, I'd be like 'WHOOOA!.......................................Wait....who's dick is bigger?'"

I literally was laughing so hard I cried. No one could talk for the next several minutes without immediately cracking up. At one point, I even applauded.

This comment came a little bit after a little schpeel where I was impersonating him, saying things like: "Hey, I'm *****. I like to say outlandish things like: I like to eat burritos while I masturbate......Oop! Have to poop!"

And then he tops me by saying that. Perfect.

Anyway, I just had to share that even if it doesn't make you laugh in the slightest.
« Last Edit: September 07, 2008, 05:09:36 PM by KashogiStogi »
black fairy tales are better at sports

Offline stevey

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #1 on: September 07, 2008, 05:12:57 PM »
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Offline Kairon

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #2 on: September 07, 2008, 06:19:38 PM »
Needless to say, **** was getting awkward, but coming through in the clutch was my friend who jumped up with his hands on his head, coincidentally, looking exactly like my pooh avatar and yelled out with such enthusiasm:

"If I had a really hot chick in my bed and it turned out that she had penis, I'd be like 'WHOOOA!.......................................Wait....who's dick is bigger?'"

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Offline NWR_insanolord

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #3 on: September 07, 2008, 06:24:28 PM »
Is it too late to add a possible Funhouse name to UncleBob's poll?
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Offline Spak-Spang

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #4 on: September 07, 2008, 06:29:20 PM »
I vote for the new quote.

Offline EasyCure

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #5 on: September 07, 2008, 07:05:59 PM »
what the hell is up with your avatar spak?
February 07, 2003, 02:35:52 PM
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Offline Bill Aurion

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #6 on: September 08, 2008, 02:25:52 PM »
All roads lead to Bridget!

Your friend sounds a bit like mine, Kashogi...except mine acts like that when completely sober... :tpg:
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Offline GoldenPhoenix

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #7 on: September 09, 2008, 01:16:14 AM »
Sounds like you are around some um, great people. :\
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Offline Stogi

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #8 on: September 09, 2008, 07:56:58 AM »
Bill - He's just as witty and eccentric when sober.

GP - Don't take it out of context. There good people with good hearts.
black fairy tales are better at sports

Offline Hostile Creation

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #9 on: September 09, 2008, 09:01:10 AM »
This reminded me a bit of something a friend of mine said.
Some guys were talking about dick size, and it got rather heated (in a joking way) until two of them were in each other's faces, going, "You wanna go at it?  Huh?  Huh, man?!"

And then my friends goes and says, "Do you want to see it all, or just enough to win?"
HC: Honourary Aussie<BR>Originally posted by: ThePerm<BR>
YOUR IWATA AVATAR LOOKS LIKE A REAL HOSTILE CREATION!!!!!<BR><BR>only someone with leoperd print sheets could produce such an image!!!<BR>

Offline EasyCure

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #10 on: September 09, 2008, 12:54:38 PM »
i dont know if i should feel normal for not ever having talked about dick size with my friends, or like the odd man out here..
February 07, 2003, 02:35:52 PM
EASYCURE: I remember thinking(don't ask me why) this was a blond haired, blue eyed, chiseled athlete. Like he looked like Seigfried before he became Nightmare.

Offline nickmitch

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #11 on: September 09, 2008, 01:24:43 PM »
My friends and I have talked about the pros and cons of being told by a chick that your dick is huge vs. being the "perfect size."
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Offline Stogi

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #12 on: September 09, 2008, 06:45:32 PM »
i dont know if i should feel normal for not ever having talked about dick size with my friends, or like the odd man out here..

I've never partook in a conversation about dick size. I always sit on the side lines. But most importantly, it never comes up unless I'm around drunk girls.
black fairy tales are better at sports

Offline Maverick

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #13 on: September 09, 2008, 07:21:02 PM »
I'm a grower not a shower.

 :-X
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Offline EasyCure

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #14 on: September 09, 2008, 07:52:05 PM »
I'm a grower not a shower.

 :-X

lol havent heard that expression in forever.

so.. nipple size (on a woman).. does it matter to you?

discuss
February 07, 2003, 02:35:52 PM
EASYCURE: I remember thinking(don't ask me why) this was a blond haired, blue eyed, chiseled athlete. Like he looked like Seigfried before he became Nightmare.

Offline nickmitch

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #15 on: September 09, 2008, 10:05:46 PM »
It should be in proportion of the size of the breast.  I know some of my friends don't like nipples to be too big, but I can let larger nipples slide if the breasts are large themselves.  Although, there is a limit to how far that goes.
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Offline EasyCure

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #16 on: September 09, 2008, 11:06:41 PM »
proportion is always best. i dated this one girl once who wasnt very big, but when excited her nipples looked like magnum rounds.. lol. it was a little weird at first but whatever, i got to see boobs right?
February 07, 2003, 02:35:52 PM
EASYCURE: I remember thinking(don't ask me why) this was a blond haired, blue eyed, chiseled athlete. Like he looked like Seigfried before he became Nightmare.

Offline Stogi

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #17 on: September 10, 2008, 12:37:36 AM »
It's hard not to like everything I've come across. Yeah there were some that were better and some that were worse (I like her nipples to be darker, not lighter or basically the same color as her skin); but all in all, you'll find no complaints here, especially because I really could care less about titties. I'm an ass man all the way.

black fairy tales are better at sports

Offline Maverick

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #18 on: September 10, 2008, 02:37:09 AM »
...I really could care less about titties. I'm a homosexual all the way.

Fixed.

Just kidding! LOLOLOLOL!
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Offline EasyCure

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #19 on: September 10, 2008, 10:26:25 AM »
too easy (wish i said it first)
February 07, 2003, 02:35:52 PM
EASYCURE: I remember thinking(don't ask me why) this was a blond haired, blue eyed, chiseled athlete. Like he looked like Seigfried before he became Nightmare.

Offline Stogi

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #20 on: September 10, 2008, 12:35:50 PM »
Pshhh....
black fairy tales are better at sports

Offline EasyCure

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #21 on: September 10, 2008, 01:18:17 PM »
*Pshhh....*

(the sound of me getting slapped in the face with a huge...)

fixt
February 07, 2003, 02:35:52 PM
EASYCURE: I remember thinking(don't ask me why) this was a blond haired, blue eyed, chiseled athlete. Like he looked like Seigfried before he became Nightmare.

Offline NinGurl69 *huggles

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #22 on: September 10, 2008, 01:29:38 PM »
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Offline bustin98

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #23 on: September 10, 2008, 01:45:06 PM »
Mmmm, boobies. I'm a boobie man all the way. Though I draw the line at fake tits. And ugly tits with numerous stretch marks or so huge and fat that watermelons are green with envy.

The perfect tit is just a little more than a handful, puffy pink nipple, and firm. Those are some nice pillows to cuddle up with.

Offline EasyCure

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Re: Possibly the funniest statement ever
« Reply #24 on: September 10, 2008, 01:52:31 PM »
i've only seen one pair of nice pink nips.. :(
I think because i'm used to seeing darker colored ones, the pink ones are special lol.

if i had to choose.. i think i'm more of an ass man myself. Sure boobs are great but an ugly, flat ass is a huge turn off for me compared to a smaller chest anyway.

whatever, any chick willing to give it to you is a good catch right? lol
February 07, 2003, 02:35:52 PM
EASYCURE: I remember thinking(don't ask me why) this was a blond haired, blue eyed, chiseled athlete. Like he looked like Seigfried before he became Nightmare.